Reviews for The NewbieBy : XxKillerOfDreamsxX |
I wonder where you had intended to go with this. It is an interesting beginning, if somewhat cliched.
I'm very curious as to the Nutcracker reference as well.
I liked the way you portrayed how lost he was; how he wasn't quite certain how to feel finding out that he was "heartless" - discovering that he cannot feel.
I am curious as to Xemnas' speech as you go into no detail, surely something you intended to explore as the chapters continued.
Should you choose to come back to this piece, I would be interested to see where you take it; will there be plot? Or is the set up in the first chapter just for the porn?
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