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Reviews for Stolen Moments

By : LotornoMiko
  • From Rezalda on June 07, 2007
    Very good! The 69 was a nice touch, and like the first story, it was both sexy and romantic. (A little more sexy in this one, though. ;)) I was wondering how you were going to handle the short amount of time between Silmeria's materialization and Lezard's Sovereign's Rite, and you did it very nicely. I would have just been, "Aw, hell, let's just make this an AU fic."

    There's just one thing I thought I'd point out in this sentence:

    "Body shuddering, she returned her lips to Silmeria's vagina, sucking that hard nub into her mouth."

    Technically, the vagina is the inside, the hole in which the penis or fingers or what have you goes. The term for the outside is "vulva," which sounds kind of weird in erotic stories, so I'd suggest "nether region" or "intimate area" or something of the like. Of course, most people wouldn't even notice what I did...I probably just have too much time on my hands. :p

    Anyway, it was a joy to read as always. :) Keep up the good work.

    ~Celia
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