Adult-FanFiction.org : Games

Reviews for Fire Emblem VII - A Lord's Cavalier

By : Streti

From ANON - SilverStar on April 10, 2011
Eliwood and Kent make such a hot couple! I love Kent's devotion to Eliwood. It's heartbreaking that he can't have Eliwood all to himself.
Report Review
From ANON - Matt on August 14, 2007
I've always been impressed by your works; they tend to break the monotony of whatever fandom you write in. They're unbelievable hot and graphic, and I love them for it. The one thing I've always thought would be nice with your writing style would be a slash/yaoi story, though I've been afraid to ask considering you wrote so many straight stories. You've given me an unbelievably hot tale with this story, something I haven't read in a while. Very few stories can truly get my blood roaring, and you're one of the few writers able to consistently do so. Even though there were some, well, odd phrasing (butthole? Terminology like that somewhat dampens the mood and the flow of the action...), I was completed turned on by your writing, something I haven't been since I read Reichuu's stories in the .hack//SIGN section. Thank you for this story. I'd enjoy seeing more yaoi stories from you, but I will understand if you'd continue to write only straight ones, and I'd enjoy them just the same.
Report Review
From Streti on June 27, 2007
Well. Those stories that you mentioned were two years ago. I feel that since then my writing quality has deteriorated, and the general interest in my stories has also waned a little, so it was time to try something new, but also something that has been in the plans for a long time now. And I think I did a pretty good job. I won't ever be writing KH stories of that kind, but I will be writing more yaoi if I feel like it. The Wetter Margin is down because there is no suitable webhost for it, and my stories have been appearing at GreyArchive even as of late. The situation at GA has only confirmed my impression of the situation. Some of the problem also goes that I haven't had much time to play any new good games lately, and there are so few good games released anymore, that there's less material to draw from. Worry not, though, my next story won't be yaoi.

As for Delia, I understand the problem. The choice of words and style was also to create a different atmosphere for the two scenes, but perhaps I will try if I can find more fitting choices at a later date.
Report Review
From Omaesan on June 26, 2007
I've been visiting less and less this site. I don't like the direction is taking, but I saw *this* and I knew that I have to register and tell you two things.

What are you trying to accomplish? Are you so eager for praise and reviews to put a scam like this? Drowning in the 70-80% of yaoi content in this site finally took its toll? I just don't understand you.

You wanted reviews, we gave them. You wanted praise, you have it already. You wanted to know that people care about your work, your readers have made clear more than once that really like your work. You wanted help to reconduct your writing style, we all liked it like it was, although kindly enough we gave you a few pointers (that you ignored). But all this wasn't enough, you wanted more. If you wanted to be regarded here, you had to appeal to the majority of the yaoi fangirls of this site. Are you insecure or what?

Sorry if this looks a bit harsh, someone has to kick you in the butt to tell you that writing yaoi is a really bad move. What happened to your site, the wetter margin? Why don't you upload your stories to greyarchive anymore (it's open again btw)? If you want your stories to get more views, spread them! Limiting yourself to this site isn't doing you any good.

Write us something nice like "DQVIII: Sailor's dream" or "Shadow Hearts Covenant: Tea for two". No more yaoi, please. Or don't listen to me and just write the nth Kingdom Hearts Sora/Riku/Roxas fanfic. That'll sure make you popular around here :p
Report Review
From ANON - Watcher on June 22, 2007
Well. For one thing, it's very different from most of your other work. Less carefree, more serious. Even a little angsty in places. The quality was great. Once again, you prove that you are more than just some lemon hack.

As for the sex...

Hey, I'm male. I'm just not aroused by that. Sorry.
Report Review
From ANON - Delia on June 17, 2007
I understand firsthand how difficult it can be to come to terms with the lack of feedback that one receives on fanfiction, and I shudder to think of the talent that we have lost due to this shameful lack of appreciation for it. However, I was very glad to read that you, at least, have decided to write for yourself. In my opinion, that's the only good reason TO write.

I was very glad to have the opportunity to read this story: truth be told, I'm a raging Kent fan, and stories about him (and the rest of the FE cast, for that matter) are rare, and hardly ever of this quality. I enjoy the imagery of the title, as well as the pairing. The story itself, on the whole, was also very pleasant to read. In particular, Kent's relationship with Priscilla (and, of course, the reasoning behind it), as well as his selfless loyalty to Eliwood, were very appropriate.

I do have some constructive criticism to offer, however. First of all, I enjoyed the voice in which your story was written: for the most part, it conveyed the feeling of a very courtly, proper thought process, which was very appropriate to the characters involved. However, there were points when that voice was broken by words which didn't seem to belong in it. The most notable and jarring examples are in the final sex scene, where modern sexual vocabulary/slang ("butthole", "precum"... etc.) have made their way into the narrative. I recognize the difficulty of writing a sex scene without resorting to such terminology, especially when one doesn't have much experience in doing so for two men, but I thought I would draw your attention to the consistency error that it creates. By contrast, the scene between Kent and Priscilla is perfectly executed (especially the paragraph which begins "They made love, eventually..."), which may be indicative of your experience with heterosexual stories.

I encourage you to continue writing. Though the lack of feedback can be discouraging, I'm sure that you have many silent fans who would be disappointed to lose the privilege of reading your work. Whatever you choose, however, congratulations on a very good first stab at a yaoi story.

I wish you the very best.
Report Review
From Streti on June 13, 2007
Ah, well. You might notice that I have revised the description. Turns out, writing yaoi is not the easiest thing for me. That is why the story is maybe a little short, and I'm not sure if I captured a proper yaoi style. Also, this story already has reviews - but they're complaining about the previously shifted statement of intent, not commenting on the story.

These "fans" that were mentioned... trouble is, I rarely hear from anybody. Watching a story wrack up some hits is not satisfactory feedback. Most of them are likely to be people that open up a story, get bored midway (or maybe even beginning), and then close the window, and don't even get to the end, where the review button is. It is true that these are slim times for straight lemons, and I fear that non-yaoi is falling into obscurity due to lack of readers, lack of writers, and the difficulty of finding the stories in the first place. Sometimes, it feels like I am one of the last non-yaoi authors still writing (well, that doesn't apply anymore), a dying breed, judging by the lack of straight stories.

When it comes to future projects, I now consider yaoi to be in my repertoire, but the next story will be something else altogether. I guess I'm writing just for myself now.
Report Review
From ANON - Adam on June 13, 2007
You've gotta be kidding me. One of the few people who doesn't write goddamn Yaoi is going to be writing it exclusively now? The reason there aren't enough people reviewing your stories is probably because there aren't enough writers like you writing good, heterosexual sex scenes for this site.

I may not review most of your stories, but I do read them. I hope you reconsider this decision, as I will stop reading your upcoming works if you only write gay stories from now on.

Ah, it disappoints me that you'd still get more people reading and reviewing your stories even if I stopped...if you choose to just write Yaoi. Why must it be so difficult to be able to read good straight fics at this site?
Report Review
From OmegaX on June 10, 2007
I agree with God of War Streti, Please Reconsiter!!!!!!

Your original Golden Sun Fic was the one that truly inspired me to become a het writer, but I fear that if you only write Yaoi, that you'll lose a great amount of your fanbase. Your fics were and are a breath of fresh air in a stale yaoi drenched area, and I fear that if you slip as well, we'll loose a good amount of quality het fics to Yaoi writers.

Praying to Twilight for your reconsiteration of said declaration

Anonelbe
Report Review
From ANON - God of War on June 10, 2007
Streti:
I have long been a fan of your work, especially with your stories of Advance Wars, Fire Emblem and Golden Sun. Despite your claim to do only yaoi from now on, I would ask you to reconsider. Your skill as a writer is quite impressive, and I understand if you were merely branching out. However, the lack of reviews is no reason to stop writing that type of fanfiction altogether. Please, keep up the good work, and continue to branch out with the types of stories you do, as it will do nothing but improve your skill as a writer.
GoW
Report Review