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Reviews for Something More

By : yeahjesse

From lolzacid on August 08, 2011
It makes me sad this is not finished, it's a great read. Very well done.
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From Eleria13 on December 01, 2009
omg, I love it. I can hardly wait for the next chapter! XD
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From JeanMPat on April 13, 2009
But but but..... More? Please....!
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From Branny on August 24, 2008
Ohhhh Robin told me about your story...sorta. xD;;

But its been so cute so far.. I can't wait till you update again.. ^_^

That last chapter with him hugging Jak and claiming him....so cute...I really can see him doing that since he's already such a brat. "His" Jak.
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From sillyneko345 on April 22, 2008
Aww! I really liked this chapter's ending :3 Jak was so sweet to give Dax a ride to the car and spare his feet. It makes perfect sense that neither of them would mind Jak picking him up, too, since they've been doing it for, what? Four years? More? Anyway, it's adorable. Especially Dax huggle/squeezing his "property." Can't wait for some of the more romantic scenes to happen in the waking world!

Aside from the cute factor, I also like the premise of Vin realizing they'd been poisoned and helping them. Vin's such a nice guy! (And so well educated! Mustelid... I never knew.) I can see the boys still wanting to continue racing at this point just to get even with Razer, but now the deadly seriousness has been taken away. No one dies if they don't win, so that must be a big tension breaker. And besides, Dax wimping out over the shot was perfect. That seems so like him, somehow. Gee, Dax, you'd think YOU were the one in prison being forcibly injected with volatile substances for two years! lol

I just updated PD, so please consider that my thanks for this newest chapter :3 Can't wait for more!
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From Sione on April 18, 2008
Of course I mean happen not happy, duuh. I�m a bit slow today. The outtakes were great by the way, very entertaining.

"I�ve had stranger dreams." XD

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From Sione on April 18, 2008
Yay, a new chapter! I wouldn�t call it short, I�m very pleased. And I know about the time, it�s crazy how quickly just one month passes. Before you know it, you realise it was way too long since you updated.

Mustelid... that�s a new one, your story is so educational. XD It�s a perfect word for Vin to use, why say ottsel when you can say mustelid, lol.

Oh my, Daxter is having dirty dreams, but what a terrible time for Vin to interrupt! XD But hopefully it will happy for real soon, and not just in Daxter�s dream world.

I love Jak�s and Daxter�s interaction in this chapter, it�s gets even more interesting now when Daxter is human. The piggyback ride, was so cute!

I�m a bit confused though, did Vin have an antidote for the poison? And if so will it work permanently so that they don�t have to race anymore? Maybe I�m just stupid... XD Well, anyway great chapter, hope to see more soon!

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From Sione on February 25, 2008
Heh, the reason as to why I have done it in one chapter and you in four is because you actually can make the story last. XD

But now Daxter is human in your story too, yay! :D Dax as an ottsel is adorable but as a human he just wants to make me squeal. It's going to be really interesting to see his reaction when he wakes up. Loved the ending were Jak had to dress his very naked friend, lol, awkward moment.

And I knew Razor was evil, you can never trust a guy in a bath robe! XD

Thumbs up for the fast update, and the long chapter! I can't offer a long chapter but at least a new chapter shortly, just as soon as I get it back from Robin. I don't know how you people manage to write so much in so little time. Oh well I never was a very fast writer in English.

I hope you continue this soon, I must know what happens next! It�s going to be quite the surprise for Daxter to wake up as human.

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From sillyneko345 on February 24, 2008
Sej... darling... I thought we discussed cliffhangers, hmmm? XD It's okay. I know what's going to happen. Roughly. I can live with that. I think.

But! The ending to this chapter is really good, I think. I like that Tess was upset over she and Daxter being on kind of "iffy" terms, and then thinking he might have been seriously hurt. And of course Jak's embarrassment trying to get Dax decent on the ride home. He behaved himself very well, under the circumstances. Oh, and he actually obeyed traffic laws! Gasp! Mark that day on the calendar...

I also liked so many of the little details through the whole thing--Dax rattling off all the technical mechanic lingo, him snuggling up to Jak just before the race and both of them helping keep each other calm with the contact, and of course Ashelin's car being refered to as the turtle. I can see her pouting big-time. "But... I'm too sexy to be the tuuuuurtle!" X3

Keep up the good work! You have to update fast, because... well, then people get distracted by your updates and forget to pester me about updating! :3 In all seriousness, though, I have mid-terms this week. Then I can really really work without worrying about all the "real" work I should be working on. Perhaps next week will herald ch. 11, hmm? xoxoxox

(p.s. the last two outtakes = brilliance! Go on, Jak, you look at that "car part," look at it loooong and hard! XD It might be a little painful for whoever Razer tried that on, though O.O If he messed up, talk about ouch!)
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From dac720 on February 19, 2008
Great chapter! Though I think the beginning scene was the best, I loved Razor giving Jak the whats what about Dax. I wonder how our little orange friend will react when he finds out who he had spilled the beans to.

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From sillyneko345 on February 18, 2008
I guess I can forgive the lack of outtakes *this* time ;)

Seriously, though. I'm in love with this story. Even with all the spoilers and sneak peeks you so generously send me, I never know just what might happen next. I love the tension Dax unknowingly created by inviting Tess out to see them race, thinking to distract himself but ending up distracting Jak just as much if not more! And now Razer knows what Orange Lightning is thinking, and of course has no qualms about using that to his advantage... I'm really looking forward to the next race scene, now that Jak is frustrated on a triple front. How will he manage to keep his mind focused and not get blown to bits on the track?!

And also... if I was anything of an artist, I would so draw a picture of all the girls pillow-fighting in Rayn's bed. Imagine all the cute and sexy sleepwear! (It's a secret, but I love cute underwear.) I dunno, it just seems sweet. All happy and giggle-y and fun. And most likely with a little ottsel eye to the keyhole, loving every moment X3 Dax is such a pervy little brat, but we love him all the more for it.

Thanks so much for the lovely update! Now I'll go work and uphold my end of the deal, so you can go rest. Hopefully I can follow your productive example! xoxoxox
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From Sione on February 18, 2008
Poor Jak, he�s so horny. It isn�t easy to deal with teenage hormones. And I didn�t know Razor could be such a match-maker. What a drama chapter this was, I hope everything will work out eventually and I want to see human Dax! :)

Now I�m going to go and submit the second chapter to my story. AFF will get new chapters on two Jak and Daxter stories on the same day, that�s got to be a record or something. XD

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From dac720 on January 14, 2008
Wow, I never pictured Jak to be so um� needy *wink, wink* Though I thought the race scene in ch.3 was fascinating, who knew that a crotch full of ottsel could improve ones driving ability ;)
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From Sione on December 19, 2007
Yay an update, very nice, keep it coming! :)
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From sillyneko345 on December 18, 2007
//Shush, you..stupid..inner voice thingy! I was only joking, yeesh.// XD I love that line... sounds like some conversations I might've had with myself at some point. Poor Dax. Just face it, little furry dude; resistence to the hotness that is teh Jakku is futile! Mhu-wa-ha-ha-ha!!

Shower scene is love. That trippin' over their own feet awkwardness is just to die for! But it is entirely understandable, especially Dax being so cutely curious about what, exaclty, Jak looks like all excited. Poor little virgins... we'll have to hurry up and do something about that ;) The last outtake is perfect, too. Hmm... what sound does an ottsel make when it is squished by a vengeful racer who's... erm... *proportions* have been insulted? XD Luv luv luv. And luv.

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