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Reviews for Fun and Games

By : sillyneko345
  • From Zetht on December 11, 2008
    "FAG"...! Go, Sej. Irony at it's best that it would be this story...

    First, thank you for the freckles! *squee* And, indeed, the firecrotch. I know it may be weird to say that I found the mention of their body hair to be sexy - but I think it had more to do with them realizing they were growing up (important: that they were growing up /together/, still as a set even though passing time was doing odd things to them) and they were exploring each other with an apprectiation most people wouldn't have without those memories. Or, at least, Jak was exploring Daxter. Besides, let's be realistic here. No one mentions that. NO ONE. When that level of positive-feeling detail is attached to something most yaoi writers won't touch with a ten foot pole, it's difficult not to find it at least interesting. And I'm such an advocate of little things like drawing the "treasure trail" on my guys, that it hit me just right.

    Of course, speaking of their past, I love how you tied in the memories between them - such as the way they used to fit on the window sill (just since everyone else mentioned that, and I loved it too). Then, the comparison between past and present with how they can't fit in their old spot unless they're willing to encroach on each other's space (which, of course, they are). Because it's the memories between them that make their "couple" dymanic so powerful, whether it's interpreted literally as a romantic couple, or just as two guys who can share everything, and rely on each other for anything, for life.

    And though almost every fan who's played the first game, or read fics about it, or just knows the duo pretty well can recognize the mention of their familiarity with each other's body language (especially Dax, having had to learn Jak's expressions way early on in order to communicate with the other boy), it feels different to me when you make note of that shared intuition they have in your fics. It comes across to me that you understand a little more deeply what it actually means to know someone so well and so innately. And that leads to another point - it's absolutely no surprise that when someone is such an ingrained part of your life and behavior, that you'd be able to share something so intimate so easily, without much question or coercing. It seemed perfectly reasonable and realistic to me, just in case you need a second, third, or whatever opinion.

    Then, Jak falling out the window with his pants down = utter hilarity. I choked on my tea. XD And the entire paragraph contianing "...if just for the instant it took to get Daxter airborne" was cute/silly. We love the silly.

    And...and just to feed your English ego...holy well-written damn. Even on just the sentence level, this makes the grammar nodes in my brain twitch with happy. And I'm not even a writer. How do I put it...there's this rule, and it goes "art before craft." You draw, lay out your idea, and enjoy it. And only after you're done drawing do you go back and fix proportions and /think/ about it and make corrections to get the final deal. I guess it would be exactly the same as writing, and I wouldn't know how you actually go about it, but it feels like you go in and write, and enjoy the hell out of it, and afterward go through and concentrate on making the little things more special and detailed and /you/. It has the air of both play and work that a professional piece deserves. When you start publishing...those "popular" authors had better watch their asses.

    I see presents in your near future, definitely. Though you already knew that. If I don't manage something before I leave, I will definitely /bury/ you in gifts when I come back. Don't worry, they won't be too heavy. They are digital. ^_^

    -Zetht
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  • From on December 07, 2008
    Good job, Robin! Cute and a little bit angsty, but well written all the same.
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  • From on December 07, 2008
    Please update soon!
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  • From yeahjesse on December 06, 2008
    Okie-dokie!!!

    I read this two nights ago, but was also busy writing some programs and papers--so I couldn't risk taking time to review.

    This story is amazing!!! I love it! It's been a while since the last time we talked about it, so it came as something of a surprise. :) (I love you, seriously).

    ;_; I need to get writing, myself...

    Anyway! My winter break starts in one week, so I'll be in that carefree mode students get into when they can run about town with their parents out working.

    This chapter was adorable from beginning to end. Some things I especially love:

    - When Jak actually speaks to say "Please?" and his uncle is shocked
    - The reason why his uncle needs to explore in the first place ("north and east"--I giggled a lot)
    - The boys remembering what it was like when they both could fit on the window
    - When Jak gets to sleep with Daxter instead of going up alone (how excited he gets :D)
    - When Dax pushes Jak outside
    - When Jak starts undressing just because his clothes are wet, but feel perfectly normal doing that in front of Dax

    It was as sweet as your stories usually are, and it has the new aura of sensuality that you took on in the later chapters of "Talk to Me." The first time you mention Daxter on the window sill, I was a little taken aback, like "Woah--that's really bold of him to do," and his character filled in really well the whole way. ^.~ In all honesty, Dax reminds me of a kid I knew when I was 13 or 14--he also felt perfectly comfortable jerking off in a friend's house while that person walks around not knowing, and even wouldn't stop when you'd walk into the room and catch him. I'm not used to him behaving in his unabashed horn-dog glory, but I like it a lot. I'm also happy because I've largely forgotten what quiet, young Jak was like. He needed a lot more guidance from Dax to make decisions in life, back then (lol, or always).

    I think that "Fun and Games" (oh my God, did you realize that abbreviated--it's FAG?) will be really different from your usual work. Dax seems more dominant than ever in this one. And oddly, this has as much potential for ultimate-happy-ending-with-lots-of-sex-and-love-and-kisses as it does for disappointment, repression, and angst. Which can be really good! If you connect this to Hush and then connect that to another fic... Happy endings can be so much sweeter if there was a pretty good chance that everything would become horrible before it got better.

    Gaaaaaaaaaah--what else? Well! It was really cute smut. Jak is such a sweety! Like "wait, I get to look? I'm ALLOWED?! I'm so looking!!!"

    I also love the way Dax know what Jak's responses are even when they're lying facing away from one another like that.

    Cuuuuute!! I wuv you. I want to fill this review page with heart symbols but it usually doesn't like showing the less-than signs. You're amazing, as always.
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  • From Sione on December 03, 2008
    Ugly friend? Pfft that’s not a very nice thing to say, Daxter would be very offended if he had heard that.

    Oh Daxter you naughty thing, touching yourself while you’re in the same room as your best friend! And he’s not even concerned about it, I didn’t know he was such a daredevil. XD

    I wouldn’t have mind seeing Jak wrestle Daxter to the ground in retribution for pushing him out of the window but I like the fact that they are sharing bed, I wonder what these will lead too. *hint, hint* :D

    Please keep it coming!
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