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Reviews for Jewel

By : ElfyGirl
  • From ANON - JokerKid on August 11, 2016

    Don't know when this was posted but god please dont stop! I need more!


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  • From ANON - Tara on February 19, 2013
    OMG more please!!!!!

    Sincerely,
    I wish I was her! ;)
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  • From Kittynater on December 08, 2009
    I likey!! I hope you continue it, Wesker is just so sexi and demanding!!!
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  • From AileenBlue on November 30, 2009
    Allright, first of all I need to mention that I'm usually not a fan of Wesker/self-insert, actually I'm not even a fan of Wesker/OC and don't like smut that much either. And guess what? I absolutely love your story! It's extremely well written. I think I like it so much because you caught Wesker's personality so well, the way you portray him is very convincing. Plus, he doesn't seem like a rapist here, just very dominant. I also like your self-insert, she's way better than those of most stories I've read, her hesitation is realistic. And if I read a romance/smut story with an OC/self-insert, I don't place much value on a detailed background story, I want the story come quickly to the point.
    That's why I think your story is an awesome piece of work, the reader gets what he/she expects to get and you have a great writing style.

    I don't get the negative feedback you received... and I'd also recommand you to post your story at other places, especially deviantart.com, the Wesker fans would love it :)

    I know, flames and negative reviews can be very discouraging. Acutally I'm not one to post comments with so much praise, but I think you really deserve it. I really, really hope that you will continue this story. You have to! Otherwise I will cry! :)

    PS: English is not my first language, so please forgive me grammar mistakes I made ;)
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  • From anacsadder on July 18, 2009
    Well, I can look at this two different ways and have a different comments for both, so pick the ones that apply to what you're aiming to accomplish.

    I get the impression that this is by a Wesker fangirl for other Wesker fangirls to fantasize about. Sort of a PWP, I suppose. From that perspective, I'd give this a 4.5/5. It got to the point quickly. With a PWP I know dancing around with the finer points of why Wesker is attracted to her and in depth OC character development might get in the way of that. I did get the impression that the word choice could be mixed up just a bit, or that there could be an eensy bit more description (not too much for either). There were a couple of typos. Small things. On a personal note, it was a bit vanilla for my tastes, but I didn't deduct any points for that. I understand if not everyone wants to tie up the characters and spank them ;p

    Now, if this was meant to be more than a fun smutt story... I'm still inclined to give it a 3.5 or maybe 4 because the writing was better than a lot of other fanfics I've seen. Seraphina is a really odd name, though. I mean, I know there are stranger names than that out there, but exotic names don't help deflect Mary-Sue radar. Of course, I don't expect you to change her name now, but... avoiding that lable with an OC does go further than giving her surface flaws like being poor. There can be rich, beautiful OCs that don't come across as Mary-Sues. Like someone above me said, taking time to really think about character motivations goes a long way.

    To reiterate, those are two different sets of comments for two different types of stories. I'm not sure which you're going for (though I'm leaning toward it being a PWP), so I offered both. If you do want to consider either of them, keep that in mind. Anyway, this isn't bad. The two different scores average out to 4.
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  • From ThexDuke on July 14, 2009
    This Story is GREAT! i really like it, i hope you continue!
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  • From IsaChan on July 11, 2009
    I love it!
    Do continue!
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  • From RaveEchidna on June 25, 2009
    I have no problem with OC's however a self insert or Mary Sue is another matter. Seraphina is flat and dull, it almost feels to me like you are taking a page out of Twilight and trying to make what is clearly a dull girl into something 'magic' by having her catch the eye of something far more then human. And no being compared to Twilight is not a good thing. I hate to say this but this has been done to death and the way you depict Wesker is shameful, he's one of the most complex evil minds to ever be spawned by Capcom. To me in this fiction he has all the smoothness of a creepy borderline Pedophile, Albert Wesker is not Edward Cullen, the funny thing is all you need to do to make this into a Twilight one shot is to change Seraphina to Bella and Albert Wesker to Edward Cullen having him ask do I dazzle you instead of do I frighten you.

    You're not a bad writer but this fiction isn't good. If you are ever going to have an OC become attached to Wesker the relationship needs to be worked on and would need time to grow. Wesker is not a porn star, Weker is not a rapist, Wesker could indeed have any woman or man he wanted, so what makes this girl make a man known for self control become a heavy breathing brute with a hard on?
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  • From TwistedIllusions on June 24, 2009
    I can't believe you got flames on this story! I actually loved it! I thought it was quite well written; and Wesker's personality seemed almost on point to me. And even if your character is a self insert, it doesn't take away from the story; as there's a difference between that and a Mary Sue. I've got an OC in my stories on FF.net that shares my name, but she's not uber perfect, nor annoyingly gorgeous. I think people are just too harsh and quick to judge. And personally I think self inserts make the story more realistic. I'm sure you wouldn't get flames if everyone could just put their names in place of your OC. I do hope you continue.


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  • From DiamondKatz on June 23, 2009
    Not sure how I feel about this other than creeped out by Wesker's behaviour :
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