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Reviews for Mind ControlBy : BeefJerkyYo |
- From ninesenshi on September 05, 2010
I liked it. Could have been better though (longer sex, etc). Would have been better if Sheva did not have the device on and was fighting the whole time. But Jill raping Sheva? What's not to like? Need more of those fics. Now write another Ningyo chap!
SailorNemesis
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- From salarta on September 05, 2010
I liked it, though there were definitely some grammar and spelling issues that could've been solved by running the story through something like Microsoft Word real fast. The raw ideas were cool, a way of Jill sort of becoming a dickgirl but not really, and it makes good use of the mind control component. It's also nice sometimes for me to see a fic that isn't really long because it reminds me not to put pressure on myself to make it really long when I write (though it often ends up that way). Thanks for writing and sharing.
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