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Reviews for Love within the desert

By : toonmissy
  • From JohnSlayer on October 03, 2009
    totally awesome start!!! Tad short though, but I'm sure you'll make up for it!
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  • From thedragongly on December 28, 2008
    Short and sweet. I really liked it! I would have drawn it out more, but then again that's why many people choose not to read my stories. You have great detail in many things, but I have to agree with another reviewer that you need more. Well, not necessarily more, just to make some of the actions flow better. I understand that Mithos can probably teleport, but some of the other scenes between the two seem a little jointed, like you remembered to add the action at a later date.
    In spite of my horrible advice and vague references,I absolutely love this story! it was cool to see how you incorporated the Goddesses into more of the OoT legend. Very cool, and the walking legend of Mithos was unique.You made everything seem more real in the overall view.
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  • From thedragongly on December 28, 2008
    Okay, your story topic caught my interest in no time, buuuuut I haven't even started reading yet! The thing is, as soon as I clicked, i noticed that you stole my disclaimer! Hahaha! I'm flattered! I can't wait to read your story and give you a real review on it!
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  • From toonmissy on November 21, 2008
    Angellich. I have always been planning to ask this, but what do I need more detail in? It's good if you mention what needs more detail so that I can improve on that. Sorry, I used to be a part of tons of writer's workshops and I had quite a few published Canadian authors say that I had quite a lot of detail and fleshed out ideas. If it's the sex scenes, I've gotten good comments on the detail in them and would say I wrote them pretty well.
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  • From Nyrue on April 13, 2007
    Pretty good; you need to give a little more detail, but otherwise it's fine. Interesting story. :)
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  • From JustS on March 24, 2007
    Excellent work, good build-up too, I hope we see the next chapter!
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  • From Manis on February 21, 2007
    If this is a taste of what's to come then I think I shall be pleased..
    you did a good job in the details of the love making.. something I need to work on myself.
    I hope to see the rest of this on here soon.
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