Click Here!

  • 1

Reviews for Shaun’s Truly Horrible Terrible Morning

By : Jenovasilver
  • From LisbetAdair on April 05, 2012
    This is a nice pairing: there's a dynamic between these two characters which blends quite easily into a defensive conflict to drawn away from sexual attraction. I like that you've spotted that and made it work here. There's some really excellent dialogue in the preamble you've written that's observant of how Shaun and Desmond interact. I would like to suggest that you spend a bit more time with Shaun's thoughts on Desmond, perhaps fleshing out the character a little more might help: is this an opportunistic encounter, or have either character previously had encounters with other men? The point about Ezio's conquests is nicely made: that's going to be difficult for the team to watch and it would be intersting to explore how Shaun feels watching Ezio: perhaps in your introduction to the pairing, you could have Shaun's thoughts on watching Ezio, the point that he finds Ezio attracting how he sees the similar things in Desmond?
    Report Review

  • 1
T.O.S. | Content Guidelines | DMCA Info | F.A.Q. | Facebook | Tumblr | Abuse | Support | Contact | Donate

Click Here!