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for The Oath

by Eeveefreak

person PikaBot
schedule March 15, 2005 at 12:00 AM
For one thing, stick with one narrator. Having a jumping POV(EVen between chapters) is something I've seen done well exactly once, and it was by a phenomenal author.

For another, I'm not sure you understand basic anatomy very well. I would recommend you bone up(no pun intended) on the subject before continuing to write.
person vury happy
schedule December 7, 2004 at 12:00 AM
This was a nyce fic though the thought of a thirteen year old child in theses situations is rather disturbing..i still really enjoyed this fic. keeo up the grood work ^^
person Anon
schedule November 27, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Write more!
person Anon
schedule November 26, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Hey, not a bad HM fic...only one thing's confusing me and keeping me from enjoying it. Which HM is this from???
person TheDarkOne
schedule October 23, 2004 at 12:00 AM
ok. farily decent. is this ur first fic?

-The Dark One

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