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August 17, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I for one like this fic it gives a nice change to Sonicx. It said AU so it can be anything you want Chris doesn't have to be a boy he can be a girl in a AU. Sure there were a few mistakes but we all make them so no biggie.
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August 16, 2006 at 12:00 AM
1st of all chris in sonic x is a boy and it aint christina is chris. im not tryin 2 b mean just tryin 2 b right
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August 6, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I think you need to do a little bit more proofreading before update with the next chapter. There were several minute mistakes that I could find just by skimming through the entire story itself.
Secondly, this feels like it was rushed. She's in her dorm, gets stormed, then gets saved/raped by Shadow in one breath?
C'mon.
It might have had a bit of a stronger effect if you had spent a little more time describing how Shadow was building on her trust before he violated her, like pretending to find a 'safer' location or something of the like.
But other than that, I suppose it's an alright story. I'm not particularly fond of Chris' character in general, and keeping in mind that I'm being very open-minded about this story, I'm looking forward to your next update.
Secondly, this feels like it was rushed. She's in her dorm, gets stormed, then gets saved/raped by Shadow in one breath?
C'mon.
It might have had a bit of a stronger effect if you had spent a little more time describing how Shadow was building on her trust before he violated her, like pretending to find a 'safer' location or something of the like.
But other than that, I suppose it's an alright story. I'm not particularly fond of Chris' character in general, and keeping in mind that I'm being very open-minded about this story, I'm looking forward to your next update.