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Delightful Depression	By : iloveMP2yea Category: Kingdom Hearts > Slash/Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1175 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts, the characters of aforenamed franchise, and all concepts and themes © respective copyright holders. All names and marks ® and/or ™ their respective claimants. Kingdom Hearts is owned wholly by Square Enix.

Chapter List
- 1-Delightful Depression
- 2-For so My Hearts Wills
- 1
- 2
Please note: I do not own any of the characters from the Kingdom Hearts series—all are owned wholly and exclusively by their copyright claimants. In addition, this story confers upon me no monetary gain. Its contents, however, are strictly copyright © 2008 Bradly Scott Kneisel, pseudonyms "iloveMP2yea" and "SHOTA-kun™."
Author's Note: Okay, guys! This is the first fanfiction at which I have ever tried my hand. It's really rough—there is a lot of expansion work that needs to be done in just this first chapter! Feel free to review honestly, or not to review at all. Have fun reading.~
Prologue

“Why
did you ever come back‽” Seifer yelled at the top of his lungs as
Roxas ran away, breathing as heavily as he ever had.
“Why
don’t you just take him on, man?” Hayner gave him a questioning
look, mixed-in with anger and discontentment. “You totally could! I know
you could beat his ass!”
Roxas
shook head. “There’s no reason to. Let him think he owns the
town.”
“You
did it before!” Hayner turned around, crossing his arms. “Fine.
I’ll get him later. Come on, guys.” Olette and Pence followed him,
leaving Roxas.
“Aren’t
you going to come along?” Olette’s eyes dug into Roxas like a
jackhammer. She grabbed onto his arm, giving it a slight squeeze.
“C’mon.” Roxas didn’t budge. He didn’t want to move, he didn’t want to go away. He was ardently rooted
to the ground, invariably stationed against any suggestion of motion. She threw
his arm, running off to join Hayner and Pence. “Come back
soon…” she looked back, but he had his eyes glued to the ground.
“Fuck
him.” He kicked a stone, sending it flying. “What’s his
problem, anyway?” Roxas lifted himself off the wall against which he was
leaning and headed towards the train station. Arriving there, he made his way
to the top of the arch and looked out upon the sunset. “I can’t
believe…why did Sora leave me like this?” Roxas glared at his
hands, eyes aching at every fingertip.
Seifer and
the gang approached, making their way to the doors. Roxas quickly hid himself
against the cold concrete. “What a loser!” Fuu proclaimed, earning
herself a glare from Seifer.
“He’s
not a loser; he’s just not a winner. We’re only here to discipline
people, remember?” Fuu shut her mouth, joining in a strange glance
towards Seifer with Rai. “You’ve never cared be—”
“Well,
it’s time I start voicing my opinion.” Gazing upon the sunset,
Seifer let his shoulders fall in a relaxed sigh. “I wonder why Sora left
us like this…”
“Like
what?” Fuu looked around, thoroughly confused.
“Y’know…without
so much as an idea as to how we discipline people more efficiently. We still
haven’t beat the hell out of those three for stealing…”
“Three?”
Fuu and Rai asked in unison.
“—four.
Four: Hayner, Pence, Olette, and Roxas.” The two subordinate members of
the Discipline Committee exchanged confused glances before taking seats beside
Seifer on the steps of the station.
Let the sun set, then!, though Roxas. Let the sun set.

Chapter One
“Why
do you have to be such an asshole?” Roxas spat in Seifer’s face. He
was pinned up against a wall in a random alley of Twilight Town’s. He and
Seifer were alone, all alone. Roxas could smell the cheap cologne wafting off
his assailant’s body.
“You
wouldn’t understand, scum. You’ve never had to protect something.
You’ve never fallen in love.” Seifer sent a punch into Roxas’
stomach, leading Roxas’ head to fall onto Seifer’s shoulder. Seifer
supported Roxas’ head with one hand and wrapped himself into a hostile
embrace with the other. “Just remember—I’m watching
you.”
Roxas
lifted his head, catching glimpse of Seifer’s bright blue eyes. They were
so close that Roxas could feel Seifer’s breath, taste the toothpaste
he’d used that morning. “Scumbag.” Seifer let Roxas fall to
the ground with a good thump!
The ground
was getting wet. Tears. Roxas was crying. He let himself go, lost any
resistance, and gave up on any mental–emotional stability to which he may
have once had claim. “Yes I have. Yes I fucking have. And they have no
idea.” He sobbed, clutching at the ground, trying to find something to
stabilize himself and his reality.
Picking
himself up, he realized that blood was dripping from his mouth. He didn’t
mind. He gladly trod along as the sky began to drizzle a light rain upon the
small city. “Don’t give up.” Sora’s voice echoed in his
head. He wanted to bash the brunette’s head in. He’d already given
up. There was no motivation left in him, no encouraging words that could
lighten his spirit. He was spent. He had
been spent, since the day he arrived back in Twilight Town.
It had
been sixteen months, and Seifer hadn’t given him a hospitable glance
since then. He and his gang prowled the city, hostile towards all but violent
only towards him. But as many times as Pence and Hayner had offered to beat the
living shit out of them, he had to decline. No need to start trouble. No need
to hurt anybody. No need to hurt Seifer.
He arrived
home, making his way up the stairs to his room. His mother hadn’t arrived
home just yet—it must’ve been a late night for her. He grabbed the
blade off his desk, kissing the cold metal. Placing it gently to his skin, he
whispered the same thing he’d whisper every time. Every one of the other
hundred scars bore the same weight, had been made under the same pretenses,
were weaved-in with the same words.
“I love you.” He sent the blade
a-sliding. And another. And another. The blood dripped down his forearm, onto
his palm, pooling at the tip of his index finger. Putting the blade back on the
desk, he crawled into bed, wishing for a brand-new day.
“Goodnight,” he whispered as softly as he could. “Sweet
dreams.”

Olette let out a loud hmph! “I would expect that of you.” Roxas turned his
face towards the ground. “I mean, if you’re going to do it, at
least give me some legitimate reason.”

Roxas put his hand on her shoulder. “I told
you…I can’t even tell you. I have absolutely zero clue why the hell
I’d do it…”

“You’re lying. You’re lying
through your teeth and you know it! I’m supposed to be your best
friend!” She began to cry.

“All right! All right! But you have to
promise not to tell anybody—not even Pence or Hayner! Especially not Pence or Hayner!”
Olette raised her head slightly. She nodded, signaling for him to proceed.

“I–I think I might have a crush
on—”

“Is it that bitch–whore
Jenny?” Olette’s eyes seemed to be impassioned with a fiery plasma
that would not allow itself to die.

Roxas chuckled—more than just chuckled,
it was an outright giggle. “No! It’s nothing like that. Actually,
it’s not a crush at all. I…I know
I’m in love with…” Roxas caught himself. He was unsure whether
he was ready to tell even his best friend. Even after sixteen months.
Especially after sixteen months.

“Out with it! Who is it‽”

“Seifer!” Olette’s tears had
dried-up. She set her elbows upon her knees and her face into her palms.

“S–Seifer?” Roxas nodded.
“Oh, Roxas.” With a teary face, she popped up. Putting a victorious
hand in the air, she began with her declamation: “We’ll just have
to show him!”

“…what?” Roxas gave himself a
good, heavy sigh.

“Well, does he know about this?”

“No…why would I have told him?
He’s beaten me up so many—”

“So we have to show him you love him! At the very least, he’ll get freaked
out and leave you alone for a while!”

Roxas shook his head. “A crazy
proposition” would have been a dramatic understatement of the situation
at hand. “And just how do you propose we do that?” Roxas’
eyes drifted to Olette’s, which were lighting up with ideas at the speed
of light.

“Oh…oh, I have my ideas.” She
stood up and grabbed the key to her house. “C’mon, we’ve got
some work to do.” Roxas and Olette barreled, at a speed surely no less
than that of sound, down the streets of Twilight Town and into Olette’s
house. Both of her parents were home, at whom Olette waved and screamed
“I’M HOME!” as she bolted up the stairs, Roxas in her grip.

“What the hell‽” Roxas
wasn’t sure he could take what he was seeing. Olette’s parents
owned a flower shop, so Olette’s room was naturally filled with one of
every type of flower imaginable.

“Step one: make a bouquet.”

“I don’t like step one. I have a
feeling I’m going to like the other steps just as bad.” Olette
giggled as she assorted them, happily prancing from one wall of her room to the
next, from her desk to her bed, from her closet to that random spot on her
floor. In the end, she had Roxas tie a pretty ribbon around the assortment of
flowers.

“I like it.”

Roxas smiled. “I like it, too.”
Olette smiled and handed Roxas a small box. “What’s this?”

Olette shook her head. “Open it,
silly.” It was a necklace. The platinum shimmered in the light, the pearl
at the end glimmering against the sun drifting-in. “It’s real
platinum, and a real pearl. Well…half a pearl. The other half is on the
bracelet you’re wearing right now, the one I gave you æons ago.
Come here, I’ll tell you what to do.”

Roxas shook his head. “Whatever you
say.”

Seifer discovered the bouquet early in the morning. He discovered an
odd set of film canisters around one o’clock in the afternoon. Each had a
small piece of paper in it, on each was written a single word. And when put in
proper order, they instructed him to go to the station. “Anybody here‽
Hello!~” Seifer threw the bouquet down and looked out upon the water. The
sun was setting again. He’d been here exactly twenty-four hours earlier.
He’d looked at a sunset that looked identical to the one he witnessed
now.

Glancing over at the bouquet and the film
canisters he’d set to his left, he let out a sigh. “The identity of
this secret admirer,” he began slowly, cautiously, as if avoiding against
jinxing the process in its entirety, “the person I want this to be could never wish this upon me, could never actually
feel that way.” He sighed again.

“Go now!” Olette whispered to
Roxas, the two of them hidden behind a pillar toward the station, behind
Seifer.

“I–I can’t!”
Roxas’ arms and legs were shaking, his voice wavering, his vision
blurring in and out.

“Yes you can! Do it!” He took out
the necklace Olette had given him and began his approach. He stepped quietly,
being sure not to make any noise, getting closer and closer to the boy whose
heart he knew he’d never steal. Crazy
fucking Olette. I’m going to die, for sure.

He placed his hands over Seifer’s eyes.
“What the—‽”

“Shh,” Roxas purred into
Seifer’s ears. He let his hands fall, placing the necklace around the
boy. Continuing to purr into Seifer’s ear, he locked the jewelry into
place and cupped Seifer’s cheek with his hand. Turning the boy’s
head to face him, Roxas looked him straight in the eyes. Which were
watering…? He was crying.

Roxas leant in and placed a kiss on the
boy’s lips. “I love you.” Seifer didn’t move. His hands
rested on Roxas’ knees, which lie to either side of him.
“I’ve loved you.” Roxas placed him arms around him in a deep
embrace. “This is how I show you.”

Seifer left Roxas on the ground, gasping for
air. He was clawing at his gut, trying to get air into his body, trying not to
vomit, doing his best to stay conscious. He wanted to fight back, he wanted to
retaliate with his own sucker-punch, but he couldn’t muster the
energy—physical or mental—to do so.

Seifer walked over and grabbed at the
half-pearl on Roxas’ right wrist. “Heh,” he scoffed.
“How nice. What a cute little gesture. Olette tell you what to do?
I’ll tell you what. Next time,” Seifer took Roxas by the hair,
bringing their faces millimetres apart. “Get different flowers—I
don’t like the purple ones.”

“S–Seifer!” Roxas gasped.

“Toy with somebody else’s emotions
next time, scumbag!”
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Delightful Depression