Aches of the heart | By : blackdiamondprincess Category: Kingdom Hearts > Slash/Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 10233 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Probably most of you guys out there know
the news by now, I'm going to start a new story that follows up to this one.
Therefore I changed the purpose of this chapter a bit and made it an Epilogue for
'Aches of the heart' and an Opening for the upcoming story
'Together in our world alone'.
I thank all of the readers and reviewers
of this story and all Riku/Sora fans out there, without which I wouldn't have
been able to find inspiration for this story. I thank all of you once more for
letting me share my world with you guys; it's a pleasure each time!
Take care everyone and write on write on!
-Balckdiamond
Princess!
_________________________________________________________
18 months have now passed.
Riku has become the vice-CEO of his
familial company after his brother got sentenced to 25 years of imprisonment
for attempt to murder with premeditation and conspiracy to rape.
Cloud and Leon left
Destiny City after the verdict, they moved to Xillion City on
the vast land to pursue their individual careers.
Kairi and Wakka still aren't married, but
the preparations are coming along well. They decided that it would be best to
wait for Kairi to finish her last year of college, which means that they'll
probably be having it in September, two months from where this chapter will
open.
Roxas, now free of the grip his
ex-boyfriend held on his life, moved to Destiny City to
pursue his psychological studies there. He and Sora became particularly close
over the months following the incidents in Crystle.
Sora finished his literature and
psychology studies and together with Riku he moved into a spacey house on the
outskirts of DC. Though all seemed well in appearances, their relationship has
met many wobbly moments and sadly, they haven't always been able to find a way
to overcome those gloomy periods.
Like now…
_________________________________________________________
Epilogue/
Opening: Together in our world alone
_________________________________________________________
The moon was shining beautifully in the
starless sky, its silver luminescence casting a trail of shimmering light on
the surface of the tranquil sea. The soft sound of the waves rolling onto the
beach in the distance and the soothing marine breeze were coming through the
open window giving out on the veranda.
Taking a deep breath and resting with the
front of his head against the glass surface of the window, he felt how arms
came to encircle his waist and held him close to his lover's body.
"Come back to bed…" A loving
kiss was caressed on the skin of his right shoulder, pushing aside the fabric
of the shirt he was wearing.
He closed his eyes and moved his face to
the tender touch, lifting his eyes to lock them with his. "Riku…"
"Is there something wrong?"
Riku whispered back, brushing a brown lock behind Sora's left ear gently.
"No…" The brunet whispered,
shaking his head and closing his eyes with a small smile as he received another
kiss on his cheek. "Everything is perfect. I'm only missing you…"
"I'm missing you too. So much…"
Riku held him closer and closed his eyes, breathing in the sweet scent of his
skin.
"I love you."
The next moment Riku was holding but air
in his arms and he sank to his knees, suddenly remembering the events that had
happened before. Sora was not there with him and it all had been but a dream…
With a sigh he woke up, opening his eyes
and sitting up in his bed with a sad expression on his face. Almost every night
for the past two weeks he had had that same dream, making him feel morose every
bright morning that had followed.
Trooper, the dog he had given Sora as a
Christmas present over a year ago was lying at the end of the bed, giving him a
tristful look.
"Good morning, boy." He said,
producing a semi-cheerful smile, but the dog did not seem to get fooled. He
whimpered in compassion with his owner, who sighed in defeat.
"I know…" He whispered, moving
himself out of the large bed. "I miss him too…"
He put on his bathrobe and walked out of
the room, Trooper following him close behind.
The park was nearly abandoned in the
early hours of a Saturday morning, the paved road cleared of any other pet
walkers or joggers like himself.
Trooper was running next to him,
following his moderate tempo and knowing the route they usually took by heart
now.
Riku smiled at the dog, his mind remembering
the times they'd go for runs with Sora like this and almost always ending up
with him carrying Sora up the stairs to their apartment. A chuckle escaped his
lips and he slowed down in his running to come to a full stop a few meters
farther, bent over and with his eyes closed. He heard Trooper bark ahead of
him, standing next to a drinking fountain. He walked over to the dog and drank
from the jet of water, feeling refreshed. "Thanks, Troop. Let's continue?
I lost my focus for a second, but I'm okay now."
Trooper barked and ran ahead, and he
quickly followed him to finish his morning jog.
His portable rang in the pocket of his
sweater as he was now standing in front of the door of his house, ready to open
it. He took it out, opening the device to bring it to his ear. "Hello,
Riku here."
"Baby?"
"Sora?" He whispered and his heart beat went up in excitement. "Babe, is
that you?"
"Yeah… it's me…" Riku could feel tears in his eyes as he listened to his soft voice,
taking a deep breath to steady himself so not to rush into the conversation.
"Are you alright?" He said,
trying to keep himself calm as he now closed the door and made his way to the
kitchen.
"Yeah..."
He could hear his soft chuckle on the
other line and he felt like crying all over again. The past two weeks had been
hell without him, he would definitely admit that and he wished he'd forgive him
and come home.
"I'm taking a jet in an hour, Riku. For DC-International Airport. I'm coming home."
Riku took a deep breath in relief.
"At what time will you land?" He asked suppressing a smile and his
tears at the same time.
"At 10.57 am."
"Ok… I'll come and pick you
up…" Riku whispered with his eyes closed, wanting to keep him on the phone
for a while longer just so he'd be able to hear his voice. "I missed you…"
He then said, hoping he sounded as sincere as he wanted to sound. "And I'm
sorry…"
There was a slight hesitation on the
other line and he could hear a soft sniffle and a sigh, signs that the pain
still hadn't left him.
"I missed you too Riku…" His voice was trembling, and Riku knew he was probably wiping away a
few tears from his cheeks. "But I'm coming home now and I can't wait to
see you…"
"Oh babe…" Riku bit his lower
lip to prevent it from quivering. "I can't wait to see you either…"
"I got to go… See you…"
"See you soon."
"Bye."
"Bye, Sora." He waited for
click on the other line and lowered his phone from his right ear, his eyes
closed as he bit his lower lip, realising that he had been granted another
chance with Sora.
His eyes then fell on the wall clock
behind him, reading 8.06
am. He went to look for Trooper so he could
give him something to eat, his heart free of the constant ache it had been
enduring and his mind feeling less heavy with the idea that they were finally
going to talk things out.
_________________________________________________________
The arrival's hall was almost abandoned
by the time he got there, having made sure that he wouldn't be late by leaving
half an hour too early.
Yet, as he looked around the waiting
area, he was surprised to see a familiar brown haired young man already waiting
for him in one of the chairs.
Sora stood slowly as he spotted him, a
small smile growing on his lips as they approached each other.
"You're early…" Riku whispered
now that they stood face to face.
"Yeah…" Sora softly spoke back,
a feeling of unease settling in between them as their eyes found it hard to
meet. "Good thing you are too…"
Riku nodded courtly, wanting for him to
look at him, but not knowing what to say to ease the growing awkwardness
between them now. He looked down at the red rolling suitcase Sora was holding
in his right hand and bent over to take it over from him. "Do you… Do you
want to go?" He asked softly, closing his eyes as their hands met very
briefly.
Sora suppressed a gasp at the small
contact and retreated his hand to put it in his back
pocket. "Uhm… yeah…" He whispered, letting go of the breath he had been holding in. "Thanks…"
Riku hated the distance that had built
between them, but he had none other to blame than himself for this. It hadn't
mattered how many times he had begged for forgiveness and implored Sora to come
back home, the result had been that they had both suffered two never-ending
weeks of loneliness and pain. He couldn't hide or lie that he loved Sora; so much
that life without him was but a hollow and miserable existence.
They were finally standing in front of
each other again and all the things that hadn't been told on that night two
weeks ago needed to be said now. He had to make Sora understand once more that
he couldn't live without him.
"Sora, listen, I—"
"Riku, I—"
They both smiled at each other before
looking away again.
Sora sighed in slight disappointment and
then looked at him. "You go first." He offered with a soft smile,
rearranging the handbag he wore over his left shoulder.
"No, it's okay, what was it you
wanted to say?" Riku whispered, giving him a gentle smile.
Sora hesitated for a moment and then
closed his eyes. "Is this the way it's going to be now?" His voice
died out a little and he opened his eyes again. "Is it going to hunt us
for ever or what?" He whispered with a melancholic chuckle, feeling closer
to tears than to laughter.
Riku clenched his fists at that and shook
his head. He reached out to Sora and placed his free hand on the nape of his
neck. "Fuck it."
Before Sora could even start to gasp in
surprise, Riku had already pulled him to him and was pressing his lips against
his, kissing him long and hard.
With the element of surprise now gone,
Sora could feel his knees grow weak as Riku held him closer, his lip seemingly
on fire and his stomach feeling like it was filled with butterflies.
Riku let go of the suitcase he was still
holding with his right hand and moved it up to cup his face so he could deepen
the kiss.
The first moan vibrated against his lips
and Riku slid his lips away from Sora's mouth, dropping kisses along the way to
his neck to burry his face in its crook with Sora's left shoulder as he now
held him in a tight embrace.
"My love for you has never changed,
Sora. I love you like on the first day I discovered my feelings for you and
even more."
Sora sniffled, closing his eyes and
returning the embrace. "Baby… I'm so sorry…"
"Let's get home." Riku
whispered, kissing the soft skin of his neck. "Let's get back home."
He smiled in relief as he felt Sora nod and reinforce his grip on him.
"I missed you so much." The
brunet whispered as they were now walking towards the exit hip to hip.
"You have no idea how much I did as
well." Riku squeezed Sora's hip briefly as he thought back of the dreams
he had been having ever since he left and smiled contently knowing that this
time Sora wasn't going to vanish. "No idea."
_________________________________________________________
His eyes were fixed on the ceiling while his body
shook with each ardent thrust Riku made in and out of him, his gasps and soft
moans convincing him that pleasure was still what he was being procured.
Somehow, somewhere between their frantic
make out session on their way up the stairs his body quit following the upbeat
tempo of the flying clothing garments, the sensual touches and the deep kisses.
It had missed the fire of their otherwise intense reunions, although now he
could feel the heat of Riku's body against his and the passion behind the many
caresses and gentle words, something else was missing.
Why didn't their lovemaking do something
to him?
A worried expression grew on his face as
he closed his eyes, his hands grabbing Riku's sides more desperately as the
pace quickened. "Hnnnh...b-baby..."
Even moaning came out as a mere automatism, and he realised that this hadn't
been what he wanted. He didn't want to make love to Riku. Or
at least, not right now...
"What's wrong?"
His eyes flew open and he was staring
into Riku's deep, sea green orbs. "N-nothing..." He softly whispered
with a smile, oppressing the trembling of his lips and the upcoming flow of
tears. "Go deeper, Riku... P-please..."
"Baby, are you crying?" Riku
questioned, stopping his movements and cupping Sora's face with his right hand.
Sora sniffled and shook his head, not
wanting to give into what he was feeling. "Don't stop..." He
whimpered, closing his eyes again and rolling his hips tentatively against his.
Though this time, he couldn't hold back the sob that found its way passed his lips
and the teardrop that rolled sideways his face. "Please don't
stop..."
"Sora..." Riku was now
completely dumbfounded as he watched him braking down in tears
"W-why... why did you stop?"
Sora whimpered, opening his eyes to look up at him.
He gave him a non-understanding look.
"Did I do something to upset you?" Riku asked worriedly. "Did I
hurt you somehow?"
Sora turned his face to the side and
closed his eyes, shaking his head. "No..."
"Then what's wrong?"
Not a word came out of Sora, who kept his
eyes closed as he sobbed further, refusing to look at him.
"You still haven't forgiven me, have
you?" Riku whispered, beginning to withdraw himself from him, a hurt look
on his face.
"No! That's not it!" Sora
whispered, looking at him now, biting his lower lip. The look in Riku's eyes
broke his heart and more tears found their way down his cheeks.
"Then what?" Riku asked, almost desperately. "Talk to me."
He couldn't tell him, he just couldn't
bring his heart to do it and as a result he simply turned his head to the side
and closed his eyes.
"I thought so; you haven't forgiven
me yet..." Riku now started to move himself off of Sora.
"Riku—" Sora whimpered, trying
to hold on to him.
"No, Sora..."
"Baby, please…" Sora pleaded,
holding on to him now and looking him in the eyes. "I just feel like we're
going too fast… I thought I wanted this, because I had missed you so much, but
I realised that I didn't… I just can't, it's too soon."
Riku didn't answer, his eyes trailing
away from his as a disappointed look grew on his face. "I guess I can't
hope for things to be the way they were before…"
"It's just too soon… I'm
sorry…" Sora had closed his eyes again. "I really am."
"Yeah…" Riku chuckled
melancholically. "Not as much as I am…"
He got out from underneath the sheets,
grabbed his pillow and his bathrobe before leaving through the bedroom door.
"Oh
god…" Placing the palms of his hands on his face, Sora rolled over to his
side, crawling into a foetal position, feeling then more than ever that their
relationship had hit rock bottom. He feared for what would happen next. He felt
tired and helpless as he thought back of all the arguing they had done so far.
He wanted to leave the past to what it was, but what was he to do now that he
felt like he was starting to lose faith in the one and only person he had loved
for all his life?
_________________________________________________________
A small picture of Sora was standing on
the small table in the living room. He had been staring at it for over an hour
now from his position on the couch. Nothing seemed to be going right anymore.
And there was no one else to blame than
himself.
Once again.
He remembered the last look Sora had
given him right before leaving two weeks ago. He hadn't even said a word, not
even a tear had rolled out of his eyes. He had simply stared at him with an
expressionless face before walking out of the door of his office.
After he had caught on the floor and on
top of his secretary, making out with her like he had never loved anyone else
before.
Riku ran his hands through his hair
deeply regretting that night.
Too much booze and oppressed sexual
frustrations.
He shook his head though; it still did
not explain why he let Lanelle seduce him that
easily.
Granted, he and Sora had been arguing a
lot more the weeks before, but it was mostly about the smaller things like
food, Trooper or even the emplacement of their new flat screen television. Yet
now that he thought about it, those had also contributed to the problems they
had had in the bedroom, or rather he had had in the bedroom with Sora…
Sora had refused to let him touch him for
over a week because he had been mad about something Riku now didn't even
remember.
He sighed, wondering what else it was he
could do to make Sora love him the way he had before again.
"Riku?"
He sat up and looked behind the couch,
finding Sora standing near the stairs in the hall, fully dressed and carrying a
travelling bag over his left shoulder. "Sora…"
"This isn't going to work for
me." Sora said, closing his eyes and facing away from him. "I'm not
ready to do this again."
Riku couldn't even start thinking of a
reply; he just stood there now; looking at him with his heart feeling like
someone was stabbing it with a knife with each beat. A trembling smile formed
on his lips though and he nodded, knowing he wouldn't be able to hold him back
anyways. "Are you going back to DI?"
"I don't know…" Sora whispered,
blinking his tears away and sniffling softly. "I think we need some time
apart—I need some more time away from you."
Riku closed his eyes, keeping the tears
away, and nodded with a brave smile. "I understand…" He then opened
his eyes and placed his right hand on his mouth, shaking his head. "Or no…
I actually don't understand." He confessed with a trembling voice, his
eyes pleadingly looking at him now. "What am I doing wrong?"
Sora took a deep breath, to keep himself from sobbing, "It's not you. It's me; I'm not
ready for all of this again."
Riku looked away to hide his now flowing
tears and ran his right hand over his face. He knew what he meant; he knew it
all still hurt too much. He now realised that by coming back, Sora had hoped to
feel better about the situation, but now it seemed that it had only made things
worse. He had done and he was still doing it.
He was hurting him again.
"I'll call you." Sora
whispered, walking to the door and reaching for the knob.
Suddenly, Trooper, awakened by the voices
of his owners, trotted inside the hall from the kitchen. He barked once as he
saw Sora with his bag and then whimpered.
"Hey boy…" Sora whispered,
kneeling down in front of him and petted him lovingly. "Oh, you've grown
so big…"
"Take him with you… He really missed
you before." Riku softly said.
Sora looked up at him briefly and then at
the dog. "Let's go then." He stood again and took the leash hanging
on a hook by the cloak closet next to the door. After having attached the pet
to the leash he opened the door and ushered Trooper out before going through
the door as well and closing it without another word.
Riku sat himself down on the wooden floor
of the hall, his back resting against the archway leading into the living room
as his watering eyes stared at the now closed door, left alone in his now empty
house.
_________________________________________________________
The talk show was nearing to its end and
he felt himself become tired as he closed his psychology book, making sure his
pencil still indicated the last viewed page. He stretched himself out in the
large black chair he was sitting in and reached for the remote standing on the
low table in front of him, turning off the TV.
His naked feet walked over the fluffy
white carpet and crossed the living room towards the kitchen, just as he heard
soft knocks on the door.
He checked his watch, reading half past eleven, wondering who it was that could be passing by at this late hour.
He opened the door and immediately
recognised the brunette standing with his dog in the hall of his apartment
building.
"Hey, Roxas…" Sora whispered
with an uneasy smile.
"Sora! What are you doing here?" Roxas wondered.
"Can… can I come in?"
_________________________________________________________
ToBeContinued…
-BDP-
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