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Blood Song	By : Hikari86 Category: +A through F > Dragon Age (all) > Dragon Age (all) Views: 1631 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Bioware owns everything Dragon Age. I claim no ownership and make no money/profit.

Chapter List
- 14
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Sorrow

It took some time getting back to the surface, but eventually they all made it, glad to see the sun again. They found themselves still in the Wending Woods, but not where they had entered the mines from. It was a completely different area, but they found it to be closer to Vigil's Keep.
As they made their way back, they took turns carrying Keenan since they were unable to bring the cart he was in with them. It was a slow process, since Keenan was in a great deal of pain every time they moved him. Anders healed what he could and tried to numb the pain but there was so much damage, none of it seemed to help. Damien couldn't stand to see his friend like he was, and Lisha could see it was hurting him just as much as it was hurting Keenan. She and Velanna were in the lead as Damien and Nathaniel carried Keenan. Sigrun and Anders stayed in the back of the group, keeping watch for any darkspawn that might want to follow them.
As they went forward, everyone stayed silent except for the occasional groan from Keenan. They were all tired, wanting to get back to the keep and get some rest before going on to the next investigation. Lisha remembered the next thing she had to do was find Kristoff. She wasn't sure where to start first. Asking Damien anything he knew about Kristoff would perhaps be best.
As she thought, something caught the corner of her eye. She stopped and gestured for the others to do the same and looked over where she saw something, hand hovering over Sulhigil. Velanna came right next to her, sensing the same thing as her own hand went straight to her staff.
“Andaran atish'an, falons,” a male elf said coming through the trees. He was Dalish and Lisha could see more behind him. “Do not be startled, we only wish to be about our way.”
“Marren?” Velanna said.
“Velanna!” The elf looked surprised to see her. “Well, well, this is certainly... surprising. Especially since you're traveling with... humans.” Marren slowly glance beyond her and Lisha to the others standing behind them.
“I've expanded my horizons, clanmate, just as Ilshae wanted,” Velanna said bitter, crossing her arms.
“We are no longer your clan, Velanna.”
“Hold on a moment,” Lisha interrupted. “Are you saying Velanna was exiled?” Lisha looked over at Velanna. “I thought all your clan died.”
“No, they were my closest friends, who I lead astray.”
“Yes you did,” said Marren. “And if they are dead, then they died without a cause.”
“Look, I know I made a mistake,” Velanna nearly yelled. “I'm sure once you tell Ilshae all about it, she's be smug.”
“No, she won't. Ilshae has passed on. We are a clan without a Keeper now, thanks to you.”
“What? She's... dead?” Velanna was surprised, her bitterness seeming to lower.
“Yes, she was stricken with guilt over losing you and half of the clan. We're better off without you, Velanna, even if we must go without a Keeper.”
“Where are you headed?” Lisha asked.
“To the lands given to the Dalish thanks to the Hero of Ferelden. There we hope to settle as many other clans already have. We were heading there to begin with, before we had to make a quick detour.”
“I'm sorry to hear about your Keeper,” Lisha bowed. “Mythal guide her.”
“May I ask who you are?” Marren asked. “And why are you traveling with Velanna?”
“I am Lisha Mahariel, Dorf'caun and leading my fellows back to Vigil's Keep.”
“Really? You are Grey Wardens? I'm sorry...” Marren bowed low. “If I had known, then I would have greeted you more properly. Tell me: are you the Lisha who lead Keeper Lanaya's clan to victory at the battle of Denerim?”
“I am, but what do you mean 'Keeper Lanaya?' That clan belongs to Zathrien.”
“Not anymore. Several months ago Zathrien stepped down and gave his First his staff, then disappeared into the Brecilian Forest. Apparently he was unable to handle dealing with humans, from what I've heard.”
“I'm sure,” Lisha said slowly, although she could probably guess the real reason for why he left.
“Well, we have lingered long enough,” said Marren. “We need to keep moving and I'm sure we're keeping you as well. Andruil guide your path.” He nodded to both Velanna and Lisha before leading his clan through the trees. When they were gone, Lisha turned to Velanna.
“Velanna... are you--”
“Don't bother with me,” Velanna snapped. “It's nothing. I'm fine. Shouldn't we keep going? Keenan's not getting any better.”
Lisha eyed her suspiciously, knowing all too well Velanna was hiding her real feelings. She reminded her of Arawin, and wondered how the two would get along.
The rest of their trip back to the Vigil was mostly uneventful. Lisha was curious to know about Velanna's exile, but knew enough to not prod her about it. Velanna was tricky enough already to just try and have a normal conversation, let alone asking her about her past.
“Did you just...?” Velanna said glaring at Sigrun.
“What?” Sigrun said unsure what Velanna was saying.
“I swear I saw you pick up a handful of dirt and sniff it back there.”
“No I didn't.”
“You did. I saw you.”
“Alright, I did, but it smells so good! I love the smell of dirt and trees and sunlight. Way better than the smells you get in the Deep Roads. Darkspawn and body odor. Eck. So what's the problem with me smelling a little dirt? Aren't elves suppose to be close to nature?
“Figuratively!” said Velanna. “We don't stuff our noses in it!”
“Well maybe you should.”
“I don't think—whoa! Is that Vigil's Keep?” Velanna said surprised as they came to the keep.
“Oh yes!” said Anders. “This here is your new home. It's kinda crowded at the moment, though, so you may not get a room. Lucky for you, however, I'm willing to share.”
Velanna cringed away from him. “I'd rather sleep in mud than with you!”
“What a coincidence! I'd rather sleep in mud with you than by myself.”
“Ah, Lisha!” Velanna growled as she went to her. “You better keep him away from me.”
“Velanna, I'm not going to be able to fight all your battles for you,” said Lisha. “He's only doing it because it gets you angry. But you don't need to worry about a room. There are plenty.”
“I'll take the one furthest away from him.”
“That, I can arrange.”
“Please... put me down,” Keenan moaned as they made their way to the front of the keep. Nathaniel and Damien gently placed him down under the Andraste statue. Lisha saw he was looking no better than when they left the woods. He was pale and clammy, looking exhausted and sick. Anders, completely forgetting about his banter with Velanna, went to check on him.
“Does it still hurt?” he asked, looking very concerned as he examined Keenan's legs. “It looks like the bleeding stopped, at least.”
“All I can feel is the pain,” Keenan breathed. “I just want it to end. Please... make it stop.”
“Is zere anything you can do?” Damien asked Anders.
“I'm trying, but there's not much I can do,” said Anders. “There's way too much damage. The bones are shattered with a whole bunch of swelling. If I had gotten to him sooner, then I might have been able to do more.”
“You can't leave 'im like zis. In pain all ze time!”
“I know, but I also can't keep giving him numbing spells, either.”
“Just end it,” Keenan said softly.
“No, I'm not going to let zat happen,” Damien said to him. “I didn't pull you out of zose mines just to see you die 'ere.”
“No,” Keenan said shaking his head weakly. “Sever my spine.”
“What?” Damien and Anders blurted together.
“You can't possibly be asking me to do that?” Anders said.
“I know I'll never be able to walk again. Doing it will take away the pain, I know it will. When I was young, there was an old man in my village who's spine was broken. He felt nothing from the waist down, and to me, that sounds wonderful right now.”
“Are you serious?” Damien asked. “Is zat what you really want?”
“All I want is the pain to go away.”
Lisha looked on at the scene, saddened by it. She hated to see Keenan in so much pain, and knowing there was nothing they could do about it. Anders and Velanna could continue to put numbing spells on his legs, but eventually they would stop working for him. She wasn't sure if what he wanted was the best thing, but she couldn't think of anything else.
“Lisha, do you think I could talk to you for a second?” Anders asked.
“Oh... sure.” Anders took her around to the other side of the statue.
“Do I have to do it?”
“Anders, well... I...” Lisha said taken aback by his question. “I-I guess not. I might be able to talk Velanna into doing it. She probably won't mind. Why, do you not know how?”
“No, it's not that, it's...” Anders rubbed his hand on his face. “This goes against everything I was taught as a spirit healer. I'm suppose to heal, not... break!”
“But you said you can't do anything for him. I know it's not an ideal solution, but it's what he wants.”
Anders looked at her with sad eyes. “I know, but what he's asking me to do is basically the bane of every spirit healer.”
“What do you mean, exactly?”
“No mage in history has ever been able to heal a spine before. Well, nerves actually. It's something that's been tried but never successfully accomplished.”
“Really?” Lisha asked. “But I thought mages healed nerves all the time.”
“It's not that easy. And healing a spine back together is nearly an impossible task. It's one of the reasons why I can't believe he's asking me to do this.”
“Okay, then let's think for a moment. What are our other options? Could you amputate his legs?”
“I could, but that wouldn't help much,” Anders sighed. “The damage is also in his pelvic region. And I can't really get rid of that.”
“Anders, I know this is difficult, but you may just have to do what you don't want to do. It's a hard decision, but I think Keenan has made his choice.”
Anders looked away from her, frustrated. “Maker, I hate being a spirit healer sometimes. Grr, fine!” He made his way around the statue back to Keenan. “Damien, could you please help me carrying him back to his room. He'll be more comfortable there.”
Damien nodded and together he and Anders took Keenan into the Vigil.
Lisha watched them enter. She then turned her attention to the others who also watched. They all seemed unsure on what to do about the situation. “Alright,” she said to Nathanial and Sigrun. “You two are free to go and do what you need. I'm not sure what we're doing next, so get some rest while you can.”
Both Sigrun and Nathaniel acknowledged her before heading in the keep themselves. All that was left standing at the statue and looking at it was Velanna.
“I should hate Her, but I don't,” said Velanna. “I can respect a woman who fights for freedom and justice.”
“Who are you talking about?” Lisha asked.
“Who do you think?” Velanna gestured at the statue. “The shamlen prophet, Andraste! I'm staring directly at her statue.”
“Yes, I know that,” Lisha said calmly. She knew all too well about that statue she was beginning to loath. “But hearing something like that from you surprises me.”
“What? I can look past petty hatred when I have reason to. Besides, I find it funny. Andraste fought a tyrannical empire, only to have her followers become one themselves.”
“An interesting observation. I think that may be one thing you and Anders have in common.”
“Please, don't ever say anything like that to me again! To think I might have something in common with that... ugh, it's just horrible!”
Lisha smiled. “So do you think you might be able to tell me about what happened with your clan?”
Velanna crossed her arms and looked down at the ground. “You know, Andraste is one of the things I envy about humans. Even though She helped to free us from slavery, She mostly did it out of convenience. The elves were an army, willing and capable. Course, if it wasn't for Her, we may still be in Tevinter, serving tea to the magisters.”
“Or not,” Lisha said seeing Velanna wasn't ready to talk about her exile yet. “Who knows, if Andraste hadn't come around, then maybe someone else would have. Maybe the elves would have formed a rebellion and we would've freed ourselves.”
“Wouldn't that be a story to tell.” Velanna nearly smiled at the thought, but it soon became another of her scowls. “But of course, something else the shemlen's took from us.”
Lisha raised an eyebrow. “There are many things you don't like about humans, aren't there?”
“Of course. If you were to go to any human child and ask them about any tale they know, they could recite to you droves of stories from beginning to end! But if you were to go to any elven child and asked them the same thing, they would not be able to tell you one.”
“Are you saying we don't have stories?” Lisha asked. “But we do.”
“Not necessarily,” Velanna scoffed. “Not nearly as many as the humans, and none of them are complete. All of our stories, our history was lost, taken away never to be recovered again. And what we have found has only been fragments. A tale without an end has no value. A story without a beginning has no moral. How are we suppose to understand or learn from such things?”
Lisha sighed, seeing Velanna looking frustrated. She knew of what the mage spoke. She had grown up with incomplete stories, songs they didn't know the meaning to, and fragments of their past that would not fit together to complete the puzzle. “It's not ideal, and realizing we may never recover our past is something no Dalish wants to think about, but unfortunately... it might be true.”
Velanna snorted.
“But you know, there are complete tales out there about elves. They're just not talked about a whole lot. Probably because they never leave the mind of the one who actually experienced them.”
Velanna looked over at Lisha confused. “What does that mean?”
“It means, maybe we can create our own stories.”
“Now you're just being ridiculous,” Velanna scolded. “Make up our own stories! What would be the point in that?”
“To give our own children something to learn from. Something to be proud of.”
Velanna had to look away from Lisha, seeing she was serious. “It's still ridiculous.”
This made Lisha smile. “Come on, Velanna. You still want to be a Grey Warden? I think it's time we found Varel and got it done.”
***
Lisha knew that she could always count on Varel to be in the throne room if he was no where else. She was correct when both she and Velanna walked in to find him dealing with a few servants.
“Oh, Commander, I'm so glad to see you back,” he said seeing her. “I heard you cleared the Pilgrim's Path and found two of the missing Wardens.”
“I did, unfortunately however, one will never be able to take up the sword again.”
“Ah yes, I heard that too. Keenan was a good man. May the Maker guide him through this tough time.”
“Aye.”
“Oh, and Commander, there is something I should bring to your attention.”
“It's not another ceremony, is it, Varel?” Lisha asked feeling sick just from the thought.
“No, no, there's nothing like that going on. But it's about the conspiracy you thought may be going on. I know you said you didn't care much about it, but I took the liberty to investigate anyway. I hope you don't mind.”
“Not at all.”
“Well, I still haven't uncovered any names yet, but there is a conspiracy. Someone is out there trying to oust you Wardens from Amaranthine. And they mean business too. I even intercepted a letter that was heading to the Crows in Antiva.”
“My, my, someone must really want us out, then, if they got the Crows involved.” Lisha rolled her eyes. “Relax, Varel. If I'm not worried, you shouldn't be either. I know how the Crows work. I used to be one.”
“You were, Commander?” Varel said shocked.
“Oh yes, a long time ago. Though, I'm not sure I can actually call myself a Crow. I worked for them, but for a short time before leaving. But I guess it doesn't matter. I was with them long enough to understand how they work. If a Crow actually does decide to take the contract against eight Grey Wardens, then he's more than likely a youngster with very little experience, just trying to make a name for himself early. So like I said, there's nothing to worry about.”
“Of course, Commander,” Varel chuckled. “I nearly forgot the Crows don't like going after Grey Wardens. They're never able to fulfill the contract. But eight Grey Wardens? Who's the eighth?”
“Right here,” Lisha said gesturing to Velanna. The Dalish mage nodded to Varel.
“Ah, I see. You keep finding recruits where ever you go, Commander.”
“Ferelden needs as many Grey Wardens as she can get. Whenever I see an opportunity, I'm not gonna let it go.”
“Of course, Commander, I'll get things prepared.” Varel had the throne room emptied, leaving only him, Lisha and Velanna inside.
“From this moment forth, Velanna, you are now a Grey Warden.” With the chalice in hand, he handed it to Velanna who took it and drank without even looking at the contents.
Lisha watched with only slight worry as Velanna began convulsing, her eyes closed tight before fainting to the floor. When Varel checked her, he sighed with relief when he found her to still be alive.
“Now there really are eight of you, Commander.”
“As I knew there would be.” There would be more soon, especially when Arawin arrived. And even though Keenan may never fight again, Lisha still considered him a Grey Warden no matter what.
When Velanna awoke, she looked dazed. “Oh, that was not at all what I expected.”
“And what did you think it would be?” Lisha asked as she helped her to stand.
“I don't know, but certainly not that!” Velanna stumbled a little, Lisha having to hold her up right.
“Why don't we go find you a room so you can rest?”
“Yeah, that sounds... good.”
Walking together through the keep, eventually Lisha found an empty bedroom for Velanna to call her own. Sitting her on the bed, Lisha called for a servant to watch over Velanna and retrieve whatever she may need. She checked to make sure Velanna was all right before leaving, seeing the mage had already fallen asleep once she hit the bed. Lisha wondered how long it had been since Velanna had had a good night's sleep. She must have been exhausted.
The servant bowed to Lisha and assured her she would watch over Velanna as she left. Not exactly sure where she was going, Lisha just walked slowly down the halls. She needed to speak to Damien, but didn't want to disturb what might be going on with Keenan. She knew that at some point she was going to have to check on the situation, but she didn't feel like now was the time. Nor did she really want to be there when Anders did whatever he had to do.
As she walked, Lisha passed an open doorway that lead to a fairly large room. When she peered inside, she saw it was a library. There were many books all along the shelves and up to the ceiling. Inside was also Sigrun and Nathaniel, looking over the books.
“Oh hey, Lisha!” said Sigrun. “Look what Nathaniel showed me. Can you believe it? I didn't even know so many books existed!”
“And they're all at your disposal, Sigrun,” Nathaniel smiled.
“I don't know if I'm going to be able to get through all these books in time, but I sure am gonna try.”
“Then you better get started,” said Lisha. “I don't know how long we're going to be here, so read while you can.”
“Will do!” Sigrun made her way over to a table with a pile of books and took the top one and sat down to begin reading.
“This is something I didn't expect to find here, either,” Lisha said to Nathaniel. “Something tells me this wasn't your father's.”
“No, it was my mother's,” Nathaniel answered. “It was back when they first were married. Either during a time when he was just trying to please her or because he actually did love her, I'm not sure. But my mother loved reading and loved books. He had this library made for her and bought all these books to fill it. Some of my happiest memories are in here.” Nathaniel looked around the room with a small smile on his face. It made Lisha smile to see it.
“So your mother taught you to read, then? To enjoy the written word.”
“Oh, very much. She made sure all three of us knew how to read and write. It was our favorite pass time for awhile. When all of us were little, this was the one thing we liked to do together that wouldn't get us into trouble. We'd sit down in a corner together and flip through several books before dinner. The only thing we ever argued about during those times was which book we would read next.”
“So you do have happy childhood memories. I knew there was something.”
“Yeah... I guess.”
“Well,” Lisha said looking about the room as well. “Which one is your favorite?”
“Oh, that would be my mother's favorite. Here.” Nathaniel walked over to a bookshelf and began looking through the books before taking one and handing it to Lisha. When she took it, she looked over the cover to find it blank. Flipping through the pages, she found them to be blank as well.
“I don't think I understand,” she said peering at him.
This made Nathaniel chuckle. “My mother always told me, the best stories are the ones we write ourselves. She loved blank books. Loved giving them to us and loved even more to read them once we filled them with whatever we wanted.”
“When was the last time you wrote your own story?”
“Too long ago.” Nathaniel looked away from her, seeming downcast.
“Then maybe you should start again,” said Lisha. “I would love to read them.”
“Really?” he said looking surprised. “What about the darkspawn?”
“You think that's all Grey Wardens deal with? During down times, we have to do something to occupy our time. There are many Grey Wardens with hobbies.”
“Hmm, I did enjoy it. But it was also foolish tales. Little boy fantasies about saving the kingdom and rescuing the beautiful princess. But you wouldn't want to read those.”
“How do you know? I'll read whatever you write, Nate. But hey...” Lisha looked over the blank book again. “Do you think I could have this? There's someone else who might benefit from it. Someone else who has stories I'm interested in reading as well.”
“Oh, of course. There are loads of blank books in here. Take as many as you want. But... who is this other person?”
Lisha smiled at him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Ma serannas.” She then left the room, book in hand.
Nathaniel watched her leave, never taking his eyes away.
“You really don't like her, huh?”
He turned around sharply at Sigrun's sudden appearance at his side. “Sigrun, could you please not sneak up on me like that.”
“Oh, I'm sorry, did I disturb some 'little boy fantasy?' Was the beautiful princess elven, or did that recently change?”
“Sigrun,” Nathaniel moaned. “I have no idea what you're talking about. And I really wish you would stop.”
“I'm just playing with you.”
“Yeah, well, it gets annoying after awhile.” Not looking at her, he left the room in a heave. Sigrun shook her head as she watched him go.
“Yeah, he's in denial. Or he's embarrassed by it.”
***
“Alright, where is he, Warden? Cough him up, I know he's here!”
If it wasn't for the fact Lisha knew Felsi, she would have thought the dwarf rude and out of place. She came up on Lisha fast, nearly before she knew what was going on. Lisha had been on her way to the kitchens, before being intercepted by her. “Felsi... it's nice... to see you again,” Lisha said.
“You too, but I'm not here for chit-chat. Now where is he?”
“Oghren? I'm not actually sure...”
“Well you better find him, because he needs to pay--”
“Hang on to your beard, woman!” Oghren bellowed as he made his way down the hall to where they stood. “I thought I heard your flaps yappin'. So what brings you here? Is this a conjugal visit? Looking for Oghren to grease the old wheel?”
“Don't lay a finger on me!” Felsi yelled, balling up her fists. “I can't believe you! Out of all the stupid things you've done, this has got to be the worst!”
“But you said it would be... hot,” Oghren chuckled.
“We were role-playing!”
“Okay, hold on there,” said Lisha becoming very disturbed. “What's all this about?”
“Oghren coming and joining the Wardens, that's what.” Felsi glared at him, an angry look that seemed if she stared at him long enough, he may burst into flames. Oghren was even beginning to back away from her as if he might.
“Hmm, something told me this might be a problem later on,” Lisha sighed. “I tried asking him how you and the baby were, but he didn't say much.”
“Of course he wouldn't,” Felsi heaved. “Look, Lisha, I don't blame you, nor do I blame Zelda and Arawin, but him being a Warden now just makes my life harder than it was before.”
“Hang on there, Fels,” Oghren protested. “Don't go blamin' all this on me. You kicked me out! Where was I suppose to go?”
“Back to Highever, maybe. You had a good things going there! They respected you in the army. Why couldn't you stay there?”
“No, I didn't have a good thing, you did! And I'm sorry for just leavin' like I did, but I just now got the ol' conker on straight. I feel at home here, more than I have anywhere else.”
“You really think so?” Felsi looked hurt, but kept herself from breaking down. “I'm sorry you feel that way. Fine, Oghren, if that's what you want... I guess the baby and I will just have to get by without you.” She turned without nodding and headed down the hall without looking back. When Felsi disappeared, Lisha turned to Oghren to see him grumbling with his head hanging low.
“Aren't you going after her?”
“No, I'd just end up being hit. She's a tiny thing but packs a surprising wallop. And in this mood, she'd go straight for my danglers. Yeah, I think it's safer to stay away.”
“Oghren... she's your wife, you should go after her no matter what.”
“I know, but... I think I'd rather face a horde of darkspawn.”
Lisha shook her head. “Does she think she can't be with you even as a Grey Warden? She and your son can come and live in the keep with you, if she wishes.”
“Look, Commander, I know you're trying to help, but just let it be. Felsi will be fine. She can handle things better than most. Now, if you would excuse me...”
Lisha was left alone in the hall. She had actually been heading to the kitchen to look for Oghren anyway, to see how he was doing and if he was up to their next task. She hadn't been able to ask him directly, but maybe he was now. Or maybe he'd be willing after that fight with Felsi.
Her next stop was finding Keenan's room and seeing how things were going. She hoped everything would be better than before, but she didn't let it go too high.
When she finally located the room, she found the inside to be thick with sadness. Keenan was lying peacefully on the bed while Damien was seated next to him reading what looked like a letter. Anders saw her in the doorway and went over. She could see from his face he didn't look pleased.
“So?” she whispered.
“It's done, for better or worse.”
“So now he's not in any pain. Isn't that a good thing?”
“It is, but... I don't know how to handle this. I just want to go in there and heal him completely but I can't.”
“It's something you need to learn, Anders. Even as a spirit healer, you can't fix everything. All you can do is try and make him comfortable.”
Anders sighed, and Lisha could tell this was the most troubled he had ever been. He was young, naive, thinking he could do anything. Now he was getting a taste of the real world, or at least a taste of the thin line that was life and death.
“Do you think I could do it?” he asked after a short moment of silence.
“Do what?”
“Fix a spine. Develop a way with magic to heal what was once thought to be unhealable.”
“What do you think?”
“When I was in the Circle, going through some forbidden papers I found on the first enchanter's desk, I found research notes from some mages in Tevinter. They had been conducting experiments to heal spines. No blood magic involved, either, which was what caught my attention the most. I despise blood magic. But they were using a combination of creation and spirit spells, particularly the spell which animates the dead, to put a severed spine back together. It was very interesting.”
“Oh, that does sound interesting,” said Lisha. “Why didn't they complete it?”
“For the same reason I'm sure their research was banned for. They experimented on unwilling slaves, and their methods weren't necessarily humane. This was back when one of the Archon's successfully banned slavery. Only for a short time, but enough to stop their research.”
“Well,” Lisha said as she saw the sparkle in his eyes as he thought about it. “I think if you tried small, such as with rats, then you might be able to do it. It'll take some time, though. After we've dealt with the darkspawn in Amaranthine, I don't see why you wouldn't have time.”
“Really?” Anders said surprised. “Because I really want to do this. But as a Grey Warden, won't I have to deal with darkspawn elsewhere as well?”
“Only if the commander gives the order.”
This made Anders smile. “Then excuse me. Keenan's fine for now, and I need to go find me some rats.”
When Anders left, Lisha made her way into the room. The light was dull, only a single candle burned next to the bed where Damien sat. She went over to see that Keenan was fast asleep, looking peaceful. “How's he doing?” she asked softly.
“Better, I zink,” Damien answer. He put the letter down. “It's what 'e wanted, but I don't know if I can handle it.”
“It's what needed to be done. Don't blame yourself. If there's anyone to blame, it would be me.”
“Why would you say zat?” Damien said surprised by her comment.
“Because if I had decided to go to the Wending Woods first, we might've been there in time to save him the pain. Maybe even to save the other Wardens.”
“You shouldn't blame yourself. You didn't know we were zere. You didn't even know we were alive. It's all right, Lisha. I don't blame you. Neither does Keenan. Zis is just... hard.” Damien looked down at his hands, ringing them together as his eyes slowly drifted to his friend.
“You two are very close, aren't you?”
“Perhaps too close,” said Damien. “He was my best friend. We went zrough the Joining together. We had each other for one night. It was a mistake, but one neither of us regretted. We might've been together after zat, but he loved 'is wife, Nida. 'E didn't want to betray her again. Wanted to stay faithful. I respected zat. And now she's 'ere.” Damien held up the letter. “She's in Amaranthine. Waiting for 'im.”
“Why doesn't she come here?”
“Because she doesn't like 'e's a Grey Warden.” Damien stood from his seat and went around the bed. “She never liked zat he was a Grey Warden. Always tried to get 'im to leave ze order.”
Lisha watched Damien pace about the room. “If she doesn't like Keenan being a Grey Warden, then why did she marry him?”
“Zey were married before 'e became a Grey Warden. 'Appy, until ze Joining.”
“Hmm, something tells me you don't like her all that much,” said Lisha.
“Not really. She doesn't appreciate what 'e does. What we do! 'E's doing zis for her! 'E came to Amaranthine to give 'er a better life. Zen she sends zis letter and doesn't even bother to come and see if 'e's okay when zere's no response.” He brandishes the letter angrily, stopping in the middle of the room. “Zis letter was sent several weeks ago, before the darkspawn attacked ze keep.”
“Keenan could have already replied to her.”
“No, I know 'e didn't,” Damien said crumpling up the letter. “We were too busy. 'E didn't even read ze letter. I found it on ze desk still in its envelope, unopened.”
“Okay, calm down,” Lisha said seeing Damien was beginning to get angry. “We can settle this. If Nida is still in Amaranthine, then later we can go and find her to tell her about Keenan. You can go and tell her yourself.”
“I guess,” Damien said calming down. “But I know she'll blame it on me. She never liked me. Even before Keenan and I...” He looked over at his friend again, sighing.
“I know this is a hard time, Damien, but I did come here for other reasons than to check on Keenan. I need you to tell me what you know about Kristoff.”
“Kristoff?” Damien questioned turning to her. “You mean he 'asn't returned yet?”
“No. Varel told me he was investigating something and wasn't here during the attack, but not much else.”
“Oh. Kristoff was investigating something about ze darkspawn in a place called... what was it? I zink it was called ze Blackmarsh. Oui, ze Blackmarsh.”
“What was he investigating.”
“I'm not exactly sure. 'E just said before he went zat 'e may 'ave found a clue to why zey weren't going back underground. And if he 'asn't returned yet... zen I don't know, Commander.”
Lisha thought for a moment. “Then I guess that's where we'll head next. If Kristoff went there some time ago and hasn't returned, then he may be in trouble.”
***
A few hours after Lisha had talked with Damien, she had all her Grey Wardens in the throne room for a meeting. They all stood in front of her in a curved line, each of them looking slightly haggard.
“I've called you all here because after talking with Damien about Kristoff, I've decided we need to go to the Blackmarsh as soon as possible. Velanna, Oghren, Sigrun, you three will be coming with me.”
“Thank the Maker!” Anders sighed. “For a moment there, I thought you were going to make me come.”
“I told you I'd get us another mage and I did,” said Lisha. “Velanna, are you up to your first mission as a Grey Warden?”
“I suppose I have no choice. But what are we doing again? I don't know who this Kristoff is.”
“He's a Grey Warden that has gone missing. Damien told me he was last seen heading to the Blackmarsh to investigate the darkspawn. That's where we're headed to hopefully find him.”
“Wait, the Blackmarsh?” said Nathaniel. “Lisha, please, you can't leave me here if you're going to that dark place.”
“I've made this decision so you can rest, Nate. The four of us will be fine.”
“You don't know the Blackmarsh like I do. It's a horrible place, filled with monsters. You're going to need me to guide you.”
“Excuse me,” Velanna sneered. “But I've been to the Blackmarsh and I know of what you speak. I can guide just as easily.”
“Commander, please...” Nathaniel continued to plead.
“Oh, calm down, Nathaniel,” said Sigrun. “I know you don't want to be separated from her, so you can go ahead and take my place. That is, of course, if Lisha allows it.”
Lisha raised an eyebrow. “I suppose if you really need to come... Nathaniel.”
“Thank you... Lisha.”
“Interesting,” Damien mused.
“While I'm gone, Damien you're in charge. If Arawin were to arrive in my absence, please make sure she is taken care of.”
“Of course, Commander. You don't need to worry. Belle will be in good hands, and so is ze Vigil. Varel will see to zat.”
“As I knew it would. Alright, Sigrun, Anders, behave yourselves. Just because you're staying at the keep doesn't mean you can fool around.”
“Oh no, Commander!” said Sigrun. “I'm not going to fool around. This gives me the chance to catch up on the book I'm reading. I still got a whole library to get through.”
“Good. Now, let us be off. Hopefully this will be a quick trip.”

Paraphrasing from Dragon Age: Origins: Awakening
A/N: For the word 'Dorf'caun', I combined the Sindarin word for 'commander' and the Dragon Age Elvish word for 'grey', and put them together in my own way to try and make Warden-Commander, or Commander of the Grey. It's probably not the way it would have been done in the game, but oh well.
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