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Leon May Cry	By : Slayne Category: +M through R > Resident Evil Views: 5954 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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((Geez, sucha perverted title...))

Chapter 2: One Eyed-Jack
The two enchanted guns Ebony and Ivory fire at the undead with the chainsaw�A chainsaw? What is this? The fuggin� Texas Chainsaw Massacre?
Geeez � Considering that it is a disgusting village inhabited with an assload of cannibalistic goons, in an abandoned town it might as well be. Dante fires his guns and just as quickly as he had drawn it, Dr. Salvador fell over, what seems like a heap load of bullets covered all over his body.
DAMNIT DANTE, HAVE YOU EVER WATCHED ANY ZOMBIE MOVIES? You gotta aim for their head there, buddy. But hey, we�ll leave him alone, he�s trying to show off here. So down big Ben goes, convulsing on the floor a bit from the magic of Dante�s bullets and then dying, vanishing into a nasty green slime.
Honestly, why green slime?
Anyway, the other goons surrounding Dante didn�t seem a bit phased about what had just happen to the better of them. Then again, they are mindless creatures afterall, there�s no room in their heads to think for themselves and only serve one purpose and that purpose is to stab things.
Well, okay not these zombies; their purpose so far is to stab any intruder with sharp pointy objects, like pitchforks and other farm equipments. FARMERS? Dante�s adversaries are farmers � not soldiers from the pits of Hell, no, he�s facing against fuggin� FAMERS, man!
Farmers who look TOTALLY human, if not for the fact that they are pale and smell like road kill and are infected and being controlled by the Las Plagas. Well, seeing that it�s no fun using his gun all the time like pretty boy Leon over there, Dante has decided to get CREATIVE. Ya know, using his sword to slash at the nearest ganado, using awesome ass-kicking combos on their asses and even combining them with an insane speed of shooting from his two lovely guns.
Now c�mon, Dante can take on DOZENS of demons from Hell at the same time with no problem, a dozen of cannibalistic goons were of no comparison, hell, they were so fragile that I bet Dante could pick one up and tear them in half just like paper! Hell, one swing of his sword could cut through metal, flesh and bones.
But like I said, he�s only showing off right now to look good in front of the human there, who was watching, his eyes focused on Dante. Yeah, that�s what he wanted, an audience, a witness to show how skilled he is, and even though it�s only one person witnessing this he didn�t mind; one sexy person was enough.
Especially if that one person was a sexy cop like Leon! Was Leon even a cop? Well, he used to be a rookie cop in Raccoon city but after experiencing crazy shit with Umbrella Corps�s zombies and being one of the very last few survivors he soon joined with an Anti-Umbrella task force with the other surviving S.T.A.R.S members where they soon ended Umbrella Corporation for good. He later joined many agencies and is now a sexy government agent who proves to be more useful and have more experience than he did when he was a rookie cop.
D-Did I mention he was sexy already? But enough about that.
A minute later, after Dante�s little hacking and slashing frenzy was over, there were no more of the undead in sight and everything seems to be clear of any danger. Wow, your new back-up sure knows how to throw them back, Leon!
�Now how�s that for getting rid of all unwanted guests?� Dante chuckles as he makes his way up the stairs to face the smaller blonde man. Leon sure was a pretty little thing �
A gun was suddenly pointed at Dante�s head and the demon-slayer raises a brow at the now angered young man.
What the heck? And just a minute ago he was staring at Dante kicking ass with his eyes lighting up so excitedly too! He could have sworn he was checking Dante out while he was at it, or maybe that�s all in Dante�s imagination? Eh, no, not really. The agent DID watch; astonished as Dante�s inhuman strength over empowered a whole group of Los Ganados (from Spanish which is the literal plural of The cattle or The Livestock) with little to no problem. Hey, Leon was good, but he wasn�t THAT good and he couldn�t help but become a bit suspicious about his new �back-up�.
Not only that, but Dante�s cocky attitude was pissing him off just a little bit. Just a TAD bit; okay I lie it was pissing him off greatly, which explains the gun aimed expertly at the too-good-to-be-human-cocky-ass-bastard named Dante over here. Yeah, if Dante were back-up, the agency would have told him, or at least would have WARNED him of not only Dante�s attitude but also his fashion sense. Hey, long coats look awesome in movies, cartoons, video games, etc, but if you were to see someone with them on in real life, they�d look a bit dorky.
An exception of course, would be if the person was uber hot, which Leon had to admit Dante had a good body, but with that attitude, the attraction is little to none. Damnit Leon, you�re too picky.
�Who are you really?� Leon growls, knowing for sure that the agency would NEVER hire such a dumbass as Dante; who is now batting the gun away from his head and onto the floor.
Bad move.
Cause Leon takes this as his cue to attack Dante with his handy-dandy knife! In which Dante easily takes a step to the side, quickly wrapping one arm around Leon�s neck and taking the human�s knife away, placing it near Leon�s neck to keep him still. Leon�s fists start to curl but did nothing to provoke the demon-slayer from cutting his throat open. Okay maybe struggle just a bit but to no avail; Dante was too strong.
�Why is it that every time I help someone, they always try to kill me?� Dante asks a bit annoyed, more to himself than to Leon.
Dante sighs, shaking his head referring to every babe he had ever aided during his life. Like Trish and Lady for example, two women who tried to kill him multiple times when all he really wanted to do was help them. Ya know, act like a fucking GENTLEMAN to them but I guess he�s just prone to being shot at or nearly killed by women or something. He did afterall admit that he had rotten luck with women maybe it�s about time he crossed over to the other side?
Hey, with Leon�s body facing forward and his back practically pressed against the demon-slayer�s front, it�s kind of hard to think with so much FRICTION being caused by Leon struggling so damned much! Stop struggling so much, Leon, yer gonna make Dante have a hard-on and you�ll notice it once it starts to pop up and say �hello� to your ass! Then again, keep struggling, we like that kind of thing.
The demon-slayer notices that in this position, he could easily take advantage of the smaller human �
But Dante isn�t that cruel. He�s a gentleman of course and would never do such a thing as raping a person, let alone a man. By tying them up and teaching their ass to obey him and only him and going all BDSM on them and then fucking their brains out until they scream and moan his name.
NAH, Dante isn�t that kind of person! Of course not! He would NEVER dream of doing that. Even to a person who was threatening to SHOOT the demon-slayer�s brains out and probably with enough bullets to his head, ultimately kill Dante! You know what, Leon? You may not be a woman, but you sure are acting like the ones he�s encountered in the past!
�I saved your life, didn�t I? You should give me some credit, pretty boy.� Dante says, smiling mischievously. Leon�s struggling ceases to a stop as he accepts the fact that this idiot isn�t planning to let him go any sooner � That still doesn�t change the fact that Leon won�t give up without a fight.
�Not like I needed your help.� The human grumbles; which is true since Leon was perfectly fine by himself without the help of any demon-slayer. ��Fucking show-off.� Oh, that sure hit a nerve on Dante cause his guard was let down enough to let Leon slip away from the taller man�s grasp. GO LEON, GO!
�Um, excuse me for the language, but what the FUCK is your problem?!� Dante growls.
Honestly! The NERVE of this fucking Human! And to think that Dante found him a bit attractive too in that tight black shirt of his and that ass that seem to rub up against him while he was still struggling against Dante oh and lastly those HIPS that rolled when Leon was pushing furniture. Seriously, take a look at his hips the next time you make him push something. You�ll be astonished.
�Do you have any idea who I am?!� Dante yells, to which Leon rolls his eyes. Psh, of course he doesn�t know who you are or why you are here or anything about you, Dante because he obviously doesn�t seem to care.
�I am the son of Sparda!� Leon raises a brow. �The son of the Legendary Dark Knight?� Leon doesn�t have a clue. �The most terrified devil of all time?� Okay Dante you better stop before he laughs at you.
Luckily for Dante, a transmission from the walkie-talkie the agent wore around his belt interrupted Leon from humiliating Dante with his cold words; Damnit.
Well, as Leon talks with what seems like a female on the walkie-talkie, Dante�s going to find a bathroom. Nature calls afterall and what sucks about it is that he couldn�t find a goddamn bathroom anywhere. Well, there�s nothing wrong with going on the side of the building right? So that�s what he�s doing right now, and with his superior senses and ass-kicking moves, there�s no way a creature as clumsy as a ganado would sneak up on him and leave with their bodies still intact.
Dante�s only violent because he�s sexually frustrated is all, there�s nothing to worry about, his mentality is healthy it�s only normal for a demon to want to cut the living shit out of people and watch the blood drip down to the floor.
Okay, maybe not the floor, but on Leon instead. Yeah, Leon, that�s right�
Naked and drenched in gore, crawling on all fours in that mess begging for Dante to �claim� him and looking so cute as he blushes, his eyes half-lidded and just giving him the sexiest look the human can possibly give his demonic lover. The human then unzipping the demon�s pants; not wasting any time engulfing as much of Dante as his mouth could fit. Sucking, licking, and lightly biting expertly causing Leon to send a vibration of whimpering moans whenever Dante would groan in appreciation. Leon bobbing his head up and down, the pace increasing as each growl of pleasure would escape from the demon�s throat, his mind feeling dizzy at just how fucking good Leon�s warm, wet mouth felt against his throbbing �
�I guess that explains why your ego is so big.� Leon says, observing the large �One-Eyed-Jack� that Dante now seems to cover.
Wait, how come Dante hadn�t sense Leon sneaking up on him?! Oh well, that�s because the demon�s mind was in the fucking clouds the whole time that he was in too much of his blood-lusting world to even take notice of the smaller man. Dante curses to himself and Leon leans against the wall, having his own little victory here of catching Dante in his most embarrassing state that seemed to have humiliated the demon a great deal; Life is good once again. Though somewhere in the back of his mind, Leon was impressed at Dante�s little soldier there, okay �little� doesn�t quite justify the size of Dante, he was WAY beyond that size.
But no matter, because the human doesn�t want to waste anymore precious time. He explains to Dante that a small chopper will come to pick them up and that they will return back to civilization as soon as they rescue Ashley and meet at the rendezvous point. Which is good! As soon as they find her, they�ll be able to leave this god forsaken island! Precious time are wasting you say?! Well, let�s get going then, huh? Cause Dante wants off this island already! Look at how pumped and excited he is!
�Your pants are still down.� Leon says bluntly. Oh sure, leave it to Leon to point out the OBVIOUS. Geez, what a bitch!
***
A/N: Doomy here! Thank you everyone for all yer lovely comments. Every five new comments I will make a new chapter. xD;;
But yey! Second chapter, yo! Leon really hates Dante�s guts, man. But he�ll eventually warm up to the ego-maniac, soon. Hopefully.
Yeah, they are a bit out of character, especially Dante, so don�t kill meeeee..!
I�m trying to aim for humor here. w;;
Anyway, Review as always!
All comments are appreciated! Good or Bad. :3
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Leon May Cry

Chapter 2: One Eyed-Jack