Adult-FanFiction.org : Games

Cullen and His Lingering Regrets	By : Royality Category: +A through F > Dragon Age (all) > Dragon Age (all) Views: 1963 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Age, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1
- 2
- 3
As pieces of armor hit the floor one by one, sounds of metal clashing against the wooden floor and laugher filled the room as the two middle-aged men found it extremely amusing undressing one another. Both were covered in layers upon layers of protective gear, but it was Cullen who found flesh first by opening a thin, white silk robe which had been hidden under three or four thicker, worn-out linen ones and unraveling an old bandage from around the Mage’s midsection. Hawke also finally located the Commander’s skin as well after pulling apart the leather-tied strings of a weathered, but still well-padded, doublet and tugging a simple undershirt over Cullen’s head.
“Scars,” they said to each other in near unison as they both had marks on their bodies that weren’t there four years ago. A brown index finger traced down a short diagonal line near Cullen’s waist just left of the man’s navel.
“Sword wound?” Hawke asked as Cullen took a deep breath in to flex the muscles there.
“Indeed. Before Cassandra recruited me from Kirkwall, one of the recruits turned on me because I wouldn’t let him kill a young mage I was helping escort out of the city,” he sighed in remembrance. “The girl was only seven years old, had just left her home only weeks before the Rebellion. When I stood between her and another Templar’s sword, I was run through. I found her hovering over my cot later, crying her eyes out and trying desperately to heal me with what little magic she could manifest. I placed her in the care of other mages when I joined the Inquisition. I may not have fully understood why you defended the mages when Anders attacked the Chantry, but I do now. The Circle didn’t just hold veteran blood mages. There were also children there, some barely into their primaries like she was, but we were told to kill them as well. You…understood that.” It was his turn to trace his fingers over Hawke’s chest where he caressed a small, but fairly fresh mark there as well. It was only a few centimeters long, likely from a short dagger, but how close it was to his friend’s heart concerned him. “And you? This is likely to have an interesting tale attached.”
“Sure,” Hawke shrugged smugly as he slowly squatted down to kiss where the new scar had formed near Cullen’s Adonis’ belt. “I got stabbed. End of story.” While the Commander frowned at the brush off, he remained still as his smallclothes were pulled down from his waist and the kissing continued around more sensitive areas. Maybe it was the scotch that allowed for such complacency or the sad truth that Cullen hadn’t let anyone near him in such a venerable state in over a year. Whichever it was, he only moved his hands away from Hawke’s nude body to hold himself up against the wall as his groin was licked and teased to a full, throbbing erection.
A few groans released from the back of his throat as his inner, muscular thighs were scratched. Looking down, he caught the lustful glimpses of those strangely illuminated seafoam pupils looking up at him. While being started at, Hawke would bounce the pink tip against this tongue on purpose to give the man a good show until Cullen became too flustered and had to look away. It was an intricate dance between embarrassing the highly aroused Blond and genuinely working with his nether regions to send him over the edge in uncontrollable pleasure.
It didn’t take long for Cullen’s body to betray him as he sprayed his first load inside of the Mage’s mouth. The sheer amount choked Hawke to where he had to let the rest squirt over his lips and chin. “Been awhile?” he taunted as he stood up presumably to gather his own armor to leave even with his own erection pulsating, but was instead spun around and landed on his back on top of the bed.
“You think you can get away that easy?” Cullen asked as he crawled on top of the Champion, kicking off his already pulled down undergarments.
“Thought crossed my mind…Templar or not, wouldn’t it be strange if someone found us tangled up like this?”
“If the Seekers couldn’t find you just a few klicks from Kirkwall, I’m pretty sure no one is going to suspect to look for you in my chambers…If they do, well, you did lock the doors…” Hawke grunted in response, already won over by the kisses and nips to his neck. Sensual biting was a weakness of his and it didn’t help how Cullen already knew that about him. Moving down the caramel skin, he stopped to stare at the potentially fatal wound again, but decided to run his tongue over it while licking his way back to Hawke’s dark pink lips.
As they easily slipped back into heavy kissing, Cullen’s callused left hand moved to interlock his fingers with the Mage and used it to his advantage to pin Hawke’s arm above them while his right one slid down the Champion’s side to eventually find its way between the pair of toned, tan-colored thighs. It was a clumsy gesture, Hawke thought, as Cullen attempted to stimulate his sex the way he assumed the man would touch himself. There were slow up and down strokes at first, followed by some twisting around the tip and thumbing at the dripping slit. Any notion of pre-cum was squeezed out to use as lubrication all while Cullen continued to nibble at Hawke’s mouth, ears, and neck. He took his cues from how much Hawke would moan and distort or how tightly his hand was being squeezed return. The grinding against the swollen head forced Hawke to gasp for air and spill more juice between his fingers. Feeling his own sex stiffen once again at the painfully erotic scene, Cullen was soon aching to plunge his cock it whatever hole he could.
“What are you waiting for?” Hawke asked as he grew restless as well and wiggled a bit, opening his legs to make it even more obvious as to what he was referring to.
“…But you’re not…prepared and mine is…over there,” Cullen whined as he looked to a far table with a few bottles of salves and potions. One of which was his small container of moisturizer he would claim was for his dried-out skin due to the cold before he would admit to the other private uses. “Silver one to the left.” Looking over, Hawke’s eyes glowed briefly as the little canister levitated and floated over to be within Cullen’s reach.
“Mages,” the Commander shook his head with a smile, but promptly took what he needed from the air and popped the lid. Inside was a white-orange cream he took a dab of on his fingertips before tossing the rest of the canister to the floor. Reaching down, he smeared it over Hawke’s opening and his own hardened organ. Hawke hissed at the heat at first, but it lessened to a sensual tingle in only a few seconds. Once Cullen had lined himself to enter, he took Hawke’s other hand to pin it above the pile of white hair as well. “I used to tell my recruits that your type didn’t need to use their hands to cast spells, but I wonder if you’ll be just as capable in this scenario.”
Before Hawke to respond, he was kissed again gently, but the sharp pain of being inserted into made him bite down on Cullen’s lower lip hard enough to draw blood. Cursing, Cullen pulled away just enough to be out of danger, but their noses still touched as he continued to pound away at the trapped man underneath him. The headboard bounced repeatedly off the stone wall and the floor creaked as it was about to fall apart right from underneath them. Locking eyes once more, he cried out as his seed spilled for a second time. Hawke winced from the sensation as he soon followed with his own eruption, his body clenching around the member still buried deep inside.
Panting, his fingers were slowly released as Cullen pulled out and rolled over onto his back with a leg hanging off the edge of the bed. The yellow curls of his hair stuck out like tumbleweed and became the source of Hawke’s amusement as he snickered while attempting to flatten them back down in vain. The Mage’s own hair was also stuck up in wild spikes with his overgrown bangs glued to his forehead from sweat which Cullen brushed away with a smile before leaning in for another much sweeter kiss this time. “Was that a thank you?” Hawke asked half-jokingly while positioning himself to look down at the Commander.
“More like a you’re welcome, I would think.”
“And people say you don’t have a sense of humor, Rutherford. So, time to ruin the mood with seriousness then?” After giving Cullen a nudge, he rolled over on top of him to look the man directly in his eyes. “When is the last time you took your lyrium, Templar?” Cullen’s hands automatically went to cup Hawke’s rear when he was laid down upon, but his teasing stopped as he was asked such a question.
“…How did you…?”
“Your blood. I could taste it…or I should say, I couldn’t taste it. Firstly, I’m a mage, so don’t ask me how I can taste it. Secondly, I did have a…relationship with someone who had lyrium embedded into their flesh. Briefly. I also understand that blue lyrium may be in short supply, but surely you can…”
“I am not a Templar. Not anymore…and it isn’t a lack of supplies, Seren. I have simply stopped taking it.”
“What?” Surprised, Hawke moved his hands to push the upper part of his body up to hover over his bed partner. “What do you mean you stopped taking it? Cullen, you can’t just…”
“I did, alright? It’s done.”
“But you’ll go into withdrawal and…”
“I’m already in withdrawal…and that’s my problem.”
“But you’ll die!” With a patient sigh, Cullen closed his eyes.
“Again, that’s something I have to risk…Hawke? Seren? Come back to bed…” he mumbled as the Mage had stood up in a huff to pace in frustration.
“You just told me that you’re willing to die because of lyrium! We have enough to worry about with rifts, the sky being torn apart, demons, darkspawn, and Maker knows what else, but now I have to worry about you killing yourself?!” Growling, Cullen took a particular offense to being yelled at and stood as well to grab Hawke by the shoulders.
“Me? You’re the one who runs off with the apostate that blew up the Chantry, disappeared for a year, and come back with a stab wound which barely missed your heart that you refuse to tell me about! Aren’t you being just as reckless?” Pressing his lips together into a thin line, Hawke pulled away once his scar was mentioned and looked to the ground.
“…It’s just a wound. Plenty of people were trying to kill Anders after what happened. Varric wrote Tales of the Champion for my sake, complete with a version of me that looks nothing like I do really. No one recognized me once we separated from other Kirkwall mages…”
“Yes, and I am grateful he described you as a giant man with pitch black hair, pale skin, and the beard of a dwarf, but if you really received that wound from protecting Anders, you would have just said so…”
“Don’t forget how I supposedly smear the blood of my slain enemies across my face,” Hawke stopped to chuckle dryly. “I kill darkspawn, dragons, and poorly dressed slavers. Why in the Maker’s name would I smear blood on my face?” Sitting back on the bed, Cullen hung his head down until he felt fingers stroking his messed hair again.
“You only killed that one dragon…”
“There were a lot of baby ones!” Hawke protested as he tried to lighten the mood, but it once again felt solemn as he finger-combed the messy yellow curls. “How bad are your symptoms? From the withdrawal, I mean?” The Commander shrugged.
“Fever, restlessness, some mild shaking. The pain comes and goes. Nothing I can’t handle but…”
“…If I tell you where I got this scar, will you let me help you? No matter what it is?” Looking up, Cullen searched Hawke’s sad eyes for something to hold on to.
“…Agreed.” With a smile, Hawke turned away to kneel down next to his armor and took his knife out from its hiding place. Cullen remembered that blade. It was the very same one which Hawke refused to kill Anders with. Moving back to the bed, the Mage took a seat next to him. Taking his own left hand, Hawke used the blade to cut his palm open. “…Blood magic…So it’s taken you after all?”
“No, I’m not about to summon a demon or anything…Give me your hand.” Cullen stubbornly refused by just staring. “Come on, you said you trusted me, so trust me.” Pressured but true to his word, the Commander offered his hand as well where, as expected, it was also cut into the very same way. “Now the tricky part…Don’t let go alright?” Hawke warned and grasped Cullen’s wounded palm with his own. A blue light appeared, swirling wind and magic around them strong enough to shake the bed about as much as it was when they were making love on it. The Commander cried out in pain as his veins lit up down his arm and throughout the rest of his body. It only took a few seconds before the light vortexed into his chest, briefly illuminating his heart before dispersing. Releasing his friend, Hawke fainted into Cullen’s arms as he blacked out for a few seconds, but quickly came to after being caught. The wounds had also healed, only leaving a splash of red. “See. No demons.”
“…What…What did you do?” Cullen asked as he carefully laid Hawke on top of the pillows to rest.
“It’s a…healing technique Anders developed that merges the blood of two people. Not his own, but say…a healthy person who recently got over a certain illness and someone who is still sick and too weak to recover. We take some of the healthy blood, sprinkle a bit of healing magic in, and move it to the sick. The healthy blood, with help, will fight off the illness that would otherwise take weeks to cure with normal treatment if the person doesn’t die first. While there is technically blood AND magic involved, I wouldn’t call it blood magic…Not really anyway. People use leaches to drain bad blood all the time. No one talks about selling their soul to the leaches…” He tried to laugh at his own joke, but only ended up groaning in pain.
“Why would you give me your blood?” But with a held out arm, Cullen immediately noticed how it wasn’t shaking anymore.
“Because I like you.” The blush on Cullen’s face made Hawke laugh again into a fit of coughs. “And also because I’m a mage. My blood reacts differently to lyrium. I use it to enhance my abilities, but I do not have a dependency on it. Even without a potion, I will still regenerate my strength albeit slower. I charged my blood to take over the nasty bits of your normal boring blood...It’s not a cure and will only be temporary…but considering tomorrow’s battle, I…we need you at your best.” Even though he understood most of what he was being told, the ex-Templar still frowned at the thought any sort of foul magic at work. Still, he had given his word and didn’t see a demon anywhere, so he had to put faith in his friend as promised. Putting the arm down, he moved to crawl on top of Hawke once again.
“And now you tell me about the scar on your chest. The one that looks as if it was made with your own knife over there.” Sighing, Hawke was hoping Cullen wouldn’t pry, but a part of him knew better.
“…That’s because it was my own knife.”
“And you’re not the type to fall on your own sword…”
“…No, I didn’t do it to myself. It was…Justice.” Blond eyebrows furrowed at the response.
“Justice? You mean Anders?! Why would he try to kill you?!”
“No, I mean it was Justice. Anders is…gone. For now.”
“Gone?” Moving back, Cullen moved to Hawke’s side looking more concerned than angry. “What do you mean he’s gone? You told the Inquisitor that you left him behind because of the Wardens.”
“And I did…but it was the Breach and all the massive holes to the Fade. Anders and I were traveling south since he wanted to get in touch with his old Commander after Kirkwall. We couldn’t make it that far since many of the Wardens had no idea how to reach their own leader. We were heading towards Amarathine when the Breach appeared and a rift opened up near us. We sensed demons and were ready to fight when Anders took my blade from my belt and attacked me without warning…but it wasn’t him. Being close to the Fade, Justice took control and...Well, let’s just say that I’m not his favorite person in the world. The only reason he missed my heart was because Anders is still in there. Somewhere. There’s just enough to keep him from killing or leaving me, but still. Since then, he reminds me every chance he gets that if not for Anders still being in there somewhere, I would be disposed of.”
“That bastard!…I…I…” But before Cullen could rant, he stopped himself as Hawke had turned over to avoid any further questioning. “…I’m sorry. This must be very difficult for you.”
“If stopping the rifts will bring Anders back, I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I don’t know what will happen tomorrow…so I’m glad we cleared the air…among other things.” Rolling to face Cullen once again, he looked up with a sad expression. “If I don’t make it out of the fortress alive tomorrow, will you…at least tell him that I tried? Even if you only talk to Justice, I know Anders is part of him. Please?” Cullen nodded to the request and let Hawke snuggle against his chest afterwards to rest. “Thank you.”
Running his fingers through the pale hair of his companion, Cullen gave Hawke enough time to fall asleep before getting comfortable himself. “I should have just said I loved you back then. Imagine where we would be now,” he whispered before drifting off, not noticing the tickling against his collarbone was from blinking eyelashes.
- 1
- 2
- 3
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Cullen and His Lingering Regrets