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The Mage and the Templars	By : Nyghtlei17 Category: +A through F > Dragon Age (all) > Dragon Age (all) Views: 8458 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Age or any of its characters. I do not make any money off of this fanfiction.

Chapter List
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The next week she practiced her lightning spells. She couldn’t bare to cast any Fireballs, thankfully Senior Enchanter Wynne did not ask that of her. She ate her meals with Jowan and listened to him talk about a girl he met while she made a great effort to keep her eyes at her own table. She kept busy and made sure to stay away from the library. She walked the halls like everyone else and kept her eyes down whenever she heard the clinking of a nearby Templar.

   At night she lie in her bed staring up at the empty top bunk in the darkness. She closed her eyes but every time she did she saw those honey eyes. She felt her eyes begin to burn with tears. Please, she begged the Maker. Please make it stop. She cried herself to sleep, drifting into the Fade.

   She awoke to someone shaking her. It was Jowan. “What is it, Jowan?” she blinked in the morning light.

His voice was shaking as he spoke, “There’s an Abomination loose in the Tower!”

   She didn’t speak. She just listened and tried to collect her thoughts.

   “It got out of the Harrowing chambers, it took down the Knight-Commander and the First Enchanter.”

She still couldn’t speak. If an Abomination was strong enough to incapacitate the Knight-Commander of the Templars and the First Enchanter… they didn’t stand a chance.

   “Hurry Kitsune we have to hide. The storage room should be safe.” Jowan pulled her to her feet. She quickly pulled her robes on and grabbed her staff. They made their way through the crowded halls and up the even more crowded stairs (which were very difficult to traverse due to the opposite flow of terrified mages). They finally made it to the storage room. Jowan opened a hidden door only the Tranquil that worked there were supposed to know about. “Come Kitsune, you first.” He nudged her back but she wouldn’t budge.

   She couldn’t move. She was staring down the hall towards the library. Cullen was always near there in the mornings. He probably had never seen an Abomination, he could be hurt or… worse. She had to see. She needed to know if he was in the library. She could easily pretend he didn’t exist but she still wanted him to do just that, exist. “Jowan, I have to go.”

   “What?!”, he said incredulously. “Have you gone mad?”

   “Just hide here.” She pushed her friend into the door. “I’ll come back.” She shut it before he could protest.

   She grabbed her staff with both hands and inhaled deeply. I have to do this, she told herself. She would never forgive herself if she didn’t. She ran straight for the library, not letting the knot in her stomach stop her from running as fast as she could.

   She poked her head in the library to get a good look. It was completely silent, nothing was moving. She crept in, careful to keep her guard up. She had Winter’s Grasp already building in her gut. Kitsune stopped walking when she heard books tumble to the floor. The frost spell worked its way up her staff and pooled at the top. She leaned against some nearby shelves and held her breath. As she went to look on the other side of the bookshelf something cold moved across her stomach then a large leather hand covered her mouth.

   Her screams were muffled by the hand. She looked down to see a longsword holding her in place against what she knew was armour stabbing her in the back. She whirled around to see intense honey eyes staring back at her. She breathed a sigh of relief into the hand, the relief was short lived.

   Don’t move, he mouthed to her. Don’t make a sound. Do you understand?

   She nodded eagerly. He released her slowly. She could feel herself smiling but wasn’t sure if it was showing on the surface. Cullen pushed her away from the edge of the bookshelves and stood there himself. He raised his longsword to use like a mirror. What he saw in the reflection she did not know but she figured it to be the Abomination. Without looking away from the reflection he grabbed her by the front of her robes and pulled her in front of him. She watched the Abomination slither in and out of the spaces between the bookshelves. It was getting closer and it’s power was so strong she could sense it growing the closer it got to her.
Her head began to throb the closer the demon got. “Mages fall into the Fade and never return.” she heard a cold voice hiss. “Mages who desire. Mages who are angry. Mages who are weak” The whispers seemed to pass through her and rumble in her chest. She felt her knees buckle and she swayed against Cullen’s chest. He steadied her with a hand on her shoulder.
“Kitsune”, he whispered. “You have to fight it.”
His words were not reaching her. She heard them, she just didn’t trust them. “No”, she said loudly. She turned from him and shoved him against the shelves with her staff, knocking some of the books from their places. “You are not real. I do not desire you.”
“Kitsune! Listen to me, please!” His words were wasted on her.
“I am just the elven mage! I am nothing to you!”, she screamed in his face. Mages who desire. Mages who are angry. Mages who are weak. The words repeated in her head over and over. No, please not this again. She covered her ears and sank to her knees in front of the Templar. “I have to wake up. Wake up. Wake up.” She chanted it over and over. I am weak.
“Maker’s breath”, he huffed. “ Get up! We have to go. Now!” He pulled her up by her arm and forced her to run with him out of the library.
She scratched his hand that gripped her arm. She felt the flesh tearing under her nails, she dug deeper. “Let me go! Let me go!” She pulled away from him before he could drag her further along. They got to the doorway, froze in their tracks.
He squeezes her arm so tight she thought it might break. “Close your eyes!”, he barked at her.
She didn’t listen. She stared directly into the dark hollows of the Abominations eyes. She could feel her thoughts becoming more tangled than they already were. She couldn’t form a coherent thought. She watched helplessly frozen as the Templar holding her arm was flung across the room by a magic that far surpassed her own. He cried out in pain when he slammed into the shelves behind her. Something deep inside her mind began to stir. It was the same feeling she had when she told Jowan she would not hide. The same feeling that pulled her out of the Fade when the Desire Demon had her in its grasp.
She didn’t realize she was clutching her oakwood staff with both of her hands and instinct had made her prepare Winter’s Grasp once again. The Abomination reached out a disgusting, mangled hand. She exhaled and allowed ice to spray from her staff. The Abomination was frozen, for now. Whatever hold it had on her was gone. She ran to the pile of books that the Templar lie under. “Cullen”, she shouted. “Cullen, please get up.” She shook him repeatedly but he would not respond. She gathered a healing spell deep within herself. She wasn’t very good at it but she had to try something, the ice was beginning to melt.
A warm white light surrounded his body and he began to stir. He smiled weakly at her, “Kitsune” His smile quickly faded and was replaced with a look of horror. She cried out in pain. She lost control of her body as lightning trembled through her. She dropped her staff and her entire body seized. Her vision went black as she fell.
There was no Fade. There was nothing but darkness. There were no sounds, nothing. She thought she was dead. But if she were dead she should be in the Fade. She was in nothingness. She could feel something. Something warm. It felt nice, she never wanted it to go away. It was so comforting here in the darkness. She was walking, but unsure if she was actually going anywhere. She couldn’t remember why she was here. She didn’t know where here was. The comforting warmth was getting warmer. She wanted to get closer. She saw a faint light in the distance. Or maybe it was in front of her and it was just very tiny. Kitsune held out her hand, it grew larger and larger getting warmer and warmer until…
She opened her eyes slowly. The light here was much too bright. A stark contrast to the darkness she was just in. The ceiling here looked familiar but she was unsure. She tried to move her head and to her dismay she could not. A blurry face hovered over her, she recognized it as came into focus. “Senior Enchant-” her voice caught in her throat. She tried to clear it but her voice would not return.
“Rest, child.” said Senior Enchanter Wynne. “You are alright, now.”
Kitsune inhaled deeply. That was good news wasn’t it? But wait exactly was wrong with her?
As if reading her mind Wynne answered her question. “The Abomination electrocuted you. You’ve been comatose for almost a week.”
A week? How could she have been asleep for that long.
“I healed you every day until you woke up”, she brushed a few stray silver hairs out of Kitsune’s face. “You were foolish to try to fight the Abomination that incapacitated the First Enchanter and the Knight-Commander. Brave”, she added. “But mostly foolish. You and that young Templar, thinking you could take on such a monster.”
“Cul...len”, Kitsune managed to say. How could she forget him. She ran back to the library to find him… and the horrible things she said to him. She searched Wynne’s eyes for the answer.
“Templar Cullen fought off the Abomination as best he could”, she sighed. “He sustained a few injuries but he managed to get you and himself to the Dining Hall. He asked me to help you…”
The older woman trailed off, her eyes growing dark.
“He collapsed and he also is comatose”, she looked to some place that she could not see, she assumed that’s where he was lying. “You need rest, Kitsune. You are not strong enough yet.” Gently, Wynne fluffed her pillows.
She lie there for a while, staring at the ceiling in the infirmary. There were still so many questions she just wasn’t able to ask them just yet. She closed her eyes and paid a much needed visit to the Fade.
She awoke to the morning light shining through a window. She tried moving a bit. Her toes wiggled and she could make a fist, a weak one but it was an improvement. She sat up slowly, feeling every bit of lying stiff for a week. Stretching her limbs she prepared herself for standing. She made it out of the bed just fine but her legs were weak, she willed herself to walk. The direction that Wynne had looked, she looked for him there. She saw a body lying on a bed identical to hers. Slowly approaching the person lying so very still she braced herself, unknowing what she would see.
Unkempt blonde hair, pale skin, strong jaw, and a wound that went from his cheek to his top lip. If she hadn't have been so weak, if she could've resisted the demon, Cullen would be awake. He would be with his Templar brothers, not here lying comatose in the infirmary. She stood over him for a time, she lost track of time. She had started crying at some point, silently pleading for him to wake up. “I am sorry, Cullen”, she whispered. She put a hand out to touch him but snatched it back. Her hand hovered in front of her for awhile, debating with herself whether or not she should touch him.
She put a small hand on his forehead and pushed his hair back from his face. He felt cold beneath her hand. His hair was soft between her fingers. The tears began to well in her eyes again, they fell from her and landed on his cheek. Quickly, she wiped her eyes with the back of her free hand never losing contact with his skin and hair. She wanted him to open those honey eyes, she wanted to look at him again, she wanted to say how foolish she had been. Reluctantly, she returned to her bed. Staring at the ceiling, she asked the Maker why it was her that was awake and not him.
The young Templar remained in comatose for many weeks to follow. Kitsune visited him every day. She sat by his side and ran her fingers through his blonde hair which had grown quite a bit. She prayed to the Maker to let him wake soon, he was losing weight rapidly. He no longer looked like the strong, healthy Templar she had hit with her Fireball weeks before. Kitsune herself hardly ate, whenever she did it tasted of dirt and ashes. Jowan had lost his patience with her after she had ignored him and made every excuse to be alone. Now he never spoke to her. She heard the whispers of mages and Templars alike. They accused her of having an unhealthy obsession with a Templar. Something that was more than frowned upon by the Chantry and the Circle. The only peace she found was in her studies. She asked Wynne to help her with her Creation spells. Maybe if she would’ve been strong enough to heal him, he would be awake.
She heard the infirmary door creak open, she snatched her hand away from Cullen’s head. Wynne was right on time with his healing. “Kitsune?”, Wynne called. “Why don’t you help me today?”
Her heart jumped, help with a healing? Her? Was she honestly ready for that. “Yes, Senior Enchanter”, was all she said. She went to retrieve her staff from the corner by the door.
“Here.” Wynne handed her a vein of pure blue Lyrium and a small box. She opened it to find a syringe and many other tools. Tools that allowed the Templars to melt and inject pure Lyrium into their veins. She took it with unsteady hands. Kitsune melted the Lyrium vein over a flame from her hand and prepared the syringe. She injected it into a large vein in the crease of his elbow. His arm glowed an unrealistic color of blue. “Now the healing, child”, Wynne said.
She nodded and held her staff firmly. The heat began to build in her and she watched as the bright white light surrounded his body. She knew this spell had much more power behind it than the one she performed in the library all those weeks ago.
She slumped back into the chair she had next to his bed. “He is never going to wake up is he Wynne?” She had never spoke so casually to a Senior Enchanter before, but either Wynne didn’t notice or she ignored it.
Wynne placed a hand on her shoulder. “I… I don’t know, Kitsune.” She sighed deeply and softly said, “But I think it best you let him go.”
She didn’t hide the tears that flowed from her face. She looked up at Wynne, not with anger but sheer terror in her grey eyes. “I… I can’t. This is all my fault…” Letting Wynne pull her close to her she cried loudly into the older woman’s robes.
“‘Tis but the Lyrium keeping him in this world now, child”, she whispered as she rubbed the top of her silver hair. “I will leave you.” Wynne left the infirmary quietly, locking the door behind her.
Kitsune wiped away the tears and studied Cullen’s meek face. It was nothing like the one she longed to see, this would do. She leaned close to his face, investigating every line and every freckle on his face committing it to memory. I won’t say goodbye, she thought. I will see you again in the Fade. Just once she wanted to know what it felt like. Knowing the door was locked, she brushed her lips against his cold and unmoving ones. She ran her slender hand through his disheveled hair one last time. Without looking back she left the infirmary never intending to return as long as he remained there.
As hard as it was she didn’t ask Wynne about Cullen’s condition. The Knight-Commander wanted to keep him in this world until the Maker was ready for him to join his ancestors in the Fade. Kitsune didn’t visit him, she didn’t ask, she willed herself to eat, to forget, to move on.
“You are doing well, Kitsune”, Wynne said approvingly. “You will make a fine Healer.”
She smiled for the first time since the Abomination. She had finally learned what happened to it. The other Senior Enchanters and a few Templar Commanders managed to destroy it.   Cullen had wounded it but he chose to get her to safety instead of destroying the demon. “Thank you, Senior Enchanter” she bowed and felt the smile fade away.
“The First Enchanter wants to see you in his quarters”, Wynne said.
She nodded her response and made her way to Irving’s quarters. The walk from the library to the First Enchanter’s quarters was a long one. She despised the walk as it only gave the other mages and Templars the opportunity to point and whisper. She thought of casting a devastating Earthquake spell and knocking them all flat on their backs.
“She was almost turned into an Abomination”, she heard some younger mages whispering in the hall.
“They say she only survived because she used Blood Magic on Cullen, traded his life for her own”, she heard Templars whisper on the stairs. She ignored them, concentrating on walking to Irving’s quarters.
She opened the large door quickly and turned to push it shut. “You wanted to see me First Enchanter?” she asked with her back to him.
“No, I summoned you”, said a cold and familiar voice. The Knight-Commander Greagoir stood in his armour, greatsword on his back..
She bowed, “Knight-Commander”
He gestured for her to sit down at a table in the center of the room. “I wanted to ask you a few questions.”
She sat in a chair that was so soft she sunk in it. “Yes, Knight-Commander.”
He sat across from her, his large build and grim face making her sink further into the chair. “You were with my Templar when he was attacked, correct?”
“Yes, ser”, she squeaked. “I was.”
Greagoir propped his elbows on the table and folded his hands, one on top of the other. “You fell under that Abominations spell, yes?”
She nodded. His tone made her afraid to speak.
“Speak, elf!” he shouted at her.
She jumped, “Yes, ser” He was making her relive the words of the demon. Mages who desire. Mages who are angry. Mages who are weak. Her hands began to shake. “Yes, I-I was weak”
The Templar smirked, “Shame it wasn’t you”, he mumbled.
She looked him in the face for the first time since she had been in this room.
“Shame you weren’t the Abomination. Weak mages like you are already demons”, he spat the words in her face. “When your Harrowing comes, I will be the one to strike you down.”
“I tried to save him”, she said to the table. “I did.”
His smug expression twisted into a horrible one. “Save him?!”, he exclaimed. “You are the reason he is still in comatose! You were weak! You let that demon control you!”
She was about to scream at him. She was going to say a number of things to him and risk him striking her down right there. But the sound of the door bursting open stopped her.
“Knight-Commander!” a Templar huffed, out of breath but still managing to find his words. “It’s Cullen, ser” Kitsune stared at him wide eyed and her lips slightly quivering. “He’s awake.”
She had stayed in the First Enchanter’s quarters while the Knight-Commander and the Templar rushed down the stairs to the infirmary. Her heart was pounding as she paced the length of the room. He was alive. She felt a weight lift from her. He was alive but, that didn’t mean she could see him. It hurt her to think that but it was the truth. It had been almost two months since she had heard his voice, since she had seen his honey eyes. What did she want from him? What did she want from herself? She sank back into the chair that was much too soft and closed her eyes.
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The Mage and the Templars