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Shepard Finds Her Soul Mate	By : KTT2123 Category: +M through R > Mass Effect Views: 5865 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Mass Effect nor its characters. I am making no money from this.

Chapter List
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When Shepard rouses out of a deep sleep, she immediately becomes aware that something is different. That she isn’t alone. The last time she hadn’t been alone in her bed was when one of her siblings had crawled into bed with her. She never allows her lovers to sleep with her. The level of trust that requires has never been met in any of her past lovers.
Lily remains still but senses no threat. Cautiously, she flexes her fingers and feels warm, leathery skin. Opening her eyes, Lily confirms her suspicion. The body she is curled against is indeed Garrus, as she knew it would be. There is no one else alive that she trusts enough to fall asleep next to. For a second, Shepard is confused as to how the turian ended up in her bed. Then, the memory of last night flashes before her eyes: her breakdown after Horizon, Garrus’ arms lifting her off the shower floor, drying her ice cold body, carrying her to the bed, then the warmth of his arms and body around her. The last thing she remembers is feeling safe and not feeling alone. For the first time in a very long time, for the first time since her parents, her sisters and brothers died. That desperately lonely part of her had eased for the first time in years because he had been with her.
Garrus is still sleeping and Shepard takes the opportunity to study him. Even asleep his face is full of sharp planes, containing none of the softness humans have in rest. Her eyes caress the features of Garrus’ face. Lily studies his clan markings, marveling at how the dark blue color stands out against his muted gray skin. The markings are interrupted only by the newly healing scars on his face. She imagines his eyes, such a piercing blue, that always makes her feel as if he somehow can see into her soul. His mandibles are slightly flared, exposing his sharp turian teeth. Despite his ‘alien’ appearance, Lily only sees the features of a beloved and trusted friend. One of the few she has left.
Shepard has never seen Garrus without a shirt and examines the strangeness of his chest. The first thing she notices is his skin. Up close it is vaguely shimmery, akin to snake skin, which adds another dimension to his otherwise lackluster gray skin. Plates of varying thickness cover his upper chest, with each plate being well-defined. Shepard wonders if this definition is because Garrus is so muscular or if it is typical of turians. Most of the plates appear smooth, while others are slightly rough. Garrus’ neck is without plates, the skin appears smoother, softer and is surrounded by what Vakarian had once told her is called a carapace. To her it seems to be something between a hood and a krogan’s hump in appearance. His waist looks much like his neck, the skin being thinner and plates noticeably absent. Stroking a finger across the ridges of Garrus’ chest, Lily jumps in surprise at how the simple touch causes such an intense fluttering in her chest. His chest plates are so warm to the touch. Moving her fingers down his chest, Shepard strokes his waist. Vakarian’s skin is remarkably different in texture there. His chest feels very leathery, while the skin at his waist is surprisingly smooth and soft. Garrus, still asleep, responds to her caress at his waist with a purring sound coming from deep in his throat. The heat she feels from touching Garrus flashes through her body and intensifies with his obvious approval. Shocked and a little overwhelmed by her reaction to Garrus, Lily snatches her fingers back. She pushes those strange feelings away, aware that she can’t deal with them right now.
Shepard shifts her weight in an attempt to slip out of his grasp. In response, Garrus rumbles disapproval low in his throat and tightens his arms around her, holding her more securely to his chest. The action is so atypical of him that Lily can’t help but laugh. The turian never has been a touchy-feeling kind of guy. The sound appears to wake Garrus and he looks around the room before his intense blue eyes settle on Lily’s. For a second, the two just stare at each other. Then, he suddenly stiffens, obviously waiting for a reprimand for his bold behavior the night before and for the position in which they lay together.
His awkwardness only increases the longer Shepard’s deep purple eyes silently stare at him. Her gaze is intent, as if seeking out his secrets, yet giving nothing of herself away. Finally, he can’t take the quiet anymore. “Uh…you were so cold from the shower…that…uh…I thought my body heat could…you know…warm you up?” Lily simply quirks an eyebrow as Garrus stumbles to explain himself. “Uh…well…I must have fallen asleep…uh…I should just go, right?” The turian continues to shift nervously side to side. Since Shepard is still pressed against him, every movement slides her against his bare skin, which only appears to increase his unease. His mandibles fluttering endlessly as his eyes dart back and forth, avoiding Shepard’s eyes, an illustration of just how nervous he is. The turian is so agitated that he seems totally ignorant that his arms are still tightly encircling her, preventing her from leaving his side.
Laying her hand on his chest, Lily soothes, “Garrus. Just relax. I am not going to attack you. I want to thank you.” It is Shepard’s turn to look uncomfortable. Her obvious insecurity finally settles the turian’s anxiety down. She continues, “Uh…what happened on Horizon…well…it was…I…Kaidan…” It is Garrus’ turn to feel smug, his mandibles fluttering to show a glimmer of his amusement that Lily is so agitated, that her usual silver tongue is astonishingly absent. Seeing Shepard flustered is something he never thought would happen, much less witness and be the cause of. Eventually, Garrus contains his amusement enough to tilt his head and flutter his mandibles in a questioning manner. Shepard has just been staring at him, baffled by her utter lack of finesse. *What the hell is going on? Why am I acting so awkward? It’s only Garrus…right?* Shepard questions herself. *I feel as tongue-tied as a teenager on her first date. Date!?! Why did I say date? Focus, Shepard!*
Garrus continues to look at her with a question in his eyes. “Uh...” Shepard mentally shakes her head. Easing out his arms, she sits up in the bed. A serious look upon her face, she asks earnestly “Is Kaidan right about me, Garrus? Am I a traitor? To the Alliance? To him?”
Vakarian immediately sobers, quickly sitting up in the bed. “What?! Shepard! NO! You are not a traitor! If anyone was betrayed, Kaidan betrayed you!” the turian answers fervently, his hands gripping her biceps firmly, his gaze intense, as if willing her to believe him. “He didn’t even give you a chance to explain, just assumed that you had betrayed him, that you what? Faked your own death? Let twenty crew members die?! Left the Alliance to work for Cerberus?! Seriously?! Assumed that you would let him, and everyone else, believe you died for two years?! Doesn’t he know you at all? He said he loved you but he sure didn’t show it. Kaidan knows nothing about love or loyalty or trust, nothing about you or who you are. I knew it was you on Omega, the first time I saw you through my scope. I knew it was you, never any doubt. Your scars were gone but you were still you. He was in a relationship with you, how could he not know!?”
Shepard just gapes at Garrus. He is breathing heavily and his face and eyes are filled with rage and intensity. *I have never seen Garrus act this way before…this intense and passionate. Definitely never outside a mission. Where has this been hiding all this time?*
More calm, Garrus continues on “You are doing the right thing here, Shepard. The Alliance sure isn’t doing anything about the Collector attacks and neither is anyone else. What are you supposed to do? Sit back and watch as thousands, maybe even millions of humans are taken, while the Alliance does nothing? That’s the right thing to do?! That’s bullshit and you know it! Cerberus is evil. You and I both know that. The horror…the torture they inflict through their ‘experiments.’ They are willing to do anything as long it gets results. No matter the pain and suffering they cause, no matter the cost, no matter how unethical or immoral. Jack’s a prime example of what they are capable of. She’s is one fucked up woman. Let’s face it, what she went through would have broken most people. It’s amazing she didn’t attack you when she knew you were Cerberus after what they did, it’s amazing she doesn’t just try to kill everyone she sees. The husks they created. What they did to Admiral Kahoku. What they did to that Alliance team, the Thresher Maw attacks. There is no denying they have done a lot of horrifying, evil things. But they are the only ones willing to do anything about the Collectors. If we can stop the Collectors, then hell yes it is worth it to work with Cerberus!”
“Garrus…I—I don’t know what to say.” Lily is staggered by the vehemence in his voice, in how much he believes and trusts in her. *Someone actually believes me, trusts me, recognizes that I am doing the right thing.*
“What, the great Commander Shepard doesn’t know what to say?” Garrus says dryly. His comment breaking through her shock.
“Laugh it up, Garrus. You are really enjoying this aren’t you?” Shepard smirks. She takes a deep breath and sighs. “But seriously, besides Joker and Chakwas, you are the only one from the Normandy, from my past, to believe in me, to trust me, to be there for me.” Although smiling, Lily has tears in her eyes. “Kaidan was just the last straw. The man I was with before I died, who professed to love me but didn’t, couldn’t trust me.” The tears disappear as her anger ignites, “How can he say he loves me but can’t trust me? What kind of man does that make him? What kind of lover? Even Anderson, a man like a father to me, doubted me. Sure, he got my Spectre status reinstated but he knew I was going to Horizon, knew that Kaidan was there, knew that Kaidan and I had been together and he did nothing. No warning, no heads up, nothing. He let me be blindsided. I deserved more than that from him. I mean, I woke up in a Cerberus lab, finding out I had been not only dead for two years but Cerberus…Cerberus!...was the one that brought me back. The Alliance, the Council had made no attempts to recover my body or those of my crew. Just left me there in the cold darkness…” she says with a faraway look on her face.
“My team, my crew, my friends were all gone. Surrounded by people I didn’t know, didn’t trust and the people I trusted didn’t trust me. Everyone changed but me. Yet, when I found you, I finally gained some balance. Somebody I trusted actually trusted me back. Garrus, you never questioned following me, you questioned trusting Cerberus but never me. You were the first person to not doubt me, to have my back. And I needed that so badly. You don’t know how lost I would have been without that, without you. I was so alone… Joker and Chakwas couldn’t help me in the field when I needed someone I could trust at my back. Jacob seemed to be an honorable man but he was still Cerberus. I needed someone who wasn’t Cerberus. When I desperately needed you, you were there. I don’ know how to thank you Garrus.”
“Shepard…I…I don’t know what to say,” he stammers awkwardly.
“Now, who’s tongue-tied?” teases Shepard.
Garrus still doesn’t know what to say, while loyalty to your superiors is just expected of turians, loyalty to a human…one who is linked to a radical human terrorist group? *I know how Dad would react to me following Shepard again. He was furious when I quit C-Sec to follow her the first time. He was so disappointed and angry that I threw my career away to follow a Spectre and a human one at that. Given how much he despises Spectres, I wasn’t actually surprised. But following a Spectre working with Cerberus, without official Council approval? Spirits, he would be so angry, so disappointed in me. More than when I quit C-Sec for the second time to go to Omega after Shepard died. Dad never understood why her death affected me so much. Without her, I was so empty, so lost. Omega was an escape, a last ditch effort to do something with my life before it was over. Before I could no longer bear to live without her. Dad... when has he ever been proud of me or understood me? I’m just not a very good turian, not a very good son.*
“Well, enough of this warm and fuzzy crap. I’m going to take a shower and then we’ll go out and find somebody to kill, sound good Vakarian?” Shepard pats Garrus’ arm, climbing out of the bed, and enters the bathroom.
Garrus’ mind is running through all that has happened since last night. Shaking his head, the turian finds and dons his armor. He takes the time to clean her armor before leaving. By the time he is in the elevator, she is already done with her shower. Garrus is still lost in his thoughts when he enters the mess hall. Miranda, Jacob, Jack, Gardner, Ken, Gabby, and Joker all turn to stare at him.
Garrus stops in his tracks, puzzled. “What?” he says wondering why everyone is looking at him that way, as he goes to the cupboards to get some dextro-friendly food. Every eye in the room follows him.
“Sleep well, Garrus?” Joker asks with his signature smirk across his face. “Shepard’s bed soft enough for you?” The turian starts a little at the blunt question. It is obvious that they all know he never left Shepard’s quarters last night. The group is practically salivating to hear all the dirty details. They all seem to assume that Garrus and Lily had sex last night. Everyone eagerly awaits Vakarian’s answer, wondering if he’ll admit the ‘truth’ or lie. Jacob is especially intent, unknowingly revealing his growing feelings for the woman to anyone who takes the time to look. “Wha—What?” stutters Garrus.
“I asked you to check on Shepard last night, not sleep with her,” Joker replies sarcastically.
“I didn’t—we didn’t—” stammers Garrus. He draws a deep calming breath, recognizing the manipulating attempt by Joker as the same he had successfully used to fluster Kaidan in the past. Narrowing his eyes, Garrus glares at the group. “It’s not going to work, Joker, I am not as naïve as Kaidan.” Joker raises his brows and tries to look innocent. Jack loses patience and demands with her usual bluntness, “So, did you fuck her or not, Vakarian?”
Not knowing how to respond, Garrus looks up from his food to see Shepard walking in behind the group. He flutters his mandibles and grins, knowing that no one else has seen or heard her. Lily smiles back before putting her intimidating commander face on. “Yeah, Garrus, so did you fuck me or not?”
The group jumps. Shock, guilt, uncertainty, and fear are written all over their faces. Gabby and Ken stand frozen, fear coming off their bodies in waves. They seem to be hoping they are invisible and protected from Shepard’s wrath as long as they don’t move. Gardner tries to look like he isn’t involved, furiously wiping the mess hall countertop. The Cerberus ice queen’s façade shows signs of cracking, despite her attempts to appear unaffected. Jacob strives for stoicism but fails, looking more like a guilty little boy caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Shockingly, even badass Jack looks a little scared at what Shepard might do. “Uh…Commander, we were just…uh…” sputters Joker, his normal arrogance astonishingly absent. Shepard lifts an eyebrow, wryly asking “You were just…what?” He jumps up, and hobbles as fast as he can force his legs to go, not caring if he breaks a bone in the process. “I think I’m needed in the cockpit,” mumbles Joker. The rest of the group disperses just as quickly, abandoning their food, each murmuring feeble lies before leaving Garrus and Shepard alone. Their eyes finally meet again.
“Did you see that, Joker jumped about five feet in the air?!” snickers Garrus.
“They were asking for it, weren’t they?” laughs Lily. A few moments later, she declares, “You know they aren’t going to let this go, right?” Shepard pauses before saying matter-of-factly, “And it’s not going to be me they are going to be pestering either. I don’t think anyone is brave enough to challenge me…not even Jack apparently.”
Garrus sighs, slumping his shoulders. Suddenly, he brightens.
“Hiding in the battery isn’t going to work…” Shepard says sympathetically.
The turian’s hopeful appearance collapses, “Spirits…”
Lily just laughs at how miserable Garrus looks; taking pity on him she states “You could just tell them the truth.”
Vakarian just shakes his head, “It’s not going to help. They won’t believe it anyway,” he moans pathetically.
“Then lie. Tell them we had sex, they’ll be so shocked that you admitted it that they’ll be speechless. Can you imagine the look on their faces? Priceless…” A devious look appears on her face. “Hmm…I wouldn’t want to miss that. Maybe I’ll tell them,” Lily says slyly.
The look on Shepard’s face scares Garrus more than a little…*I am so glad I’m not on her bad side, there isn’t a more daunting adversary than Shepard.*
“Yes! This is going to be fun. Garrus, I don’t want you to say anything to anyone, got it? Here’s what we are going to do…” The Commander lays out her plan.
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Shepard Finds Her Soul Mate