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To Break a Hero	By : Tanwen Category: +M through R > Mass Effect Views: 6126 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Mass Effect, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 5
- 6
- 7
A/N: I consider this to be the start of Part 2 of this fic, with a POV switch to Shepard. And … cue the angst!
Kaidan was still missing.
Commander Jane Shepard had brokered a peace between the krogans and turians, defused a bomb, defeated a Reaper, and cured the genophage. She was facing the greatest threat the galaxy had ever seen and was the only one who seemed to be able to get anything done these days.
But she couldn’t find the man she loved.
Liara and Garrus were each trying to keep her spirits high, in their own ways, and she appreciated her friends’ efforts. It just wasn’t the same as having Kaidan by her side.
She resisted the urge to check her terminal again. She’d have been notified if there was anything - and she needed to start getting ready to go to the Citadel. She didn’t know what Councilor Valern wanted of her, but she wasn’t about to ignore such a direct communication from the Council.
“Shepard, we have exited the mass relay,” EDI said through the speakers in her ceiling.
“I’m on my way to the bridge,” Shepard replied. “And EDI - get ready. I’m taking you and James on this one.”
“Yes, Commander,” EDI replied. Shepard thought she might have heard some triumph in the AI’s voice.

Shepard was on edge as they made their way through the cafeteria towards the executor’s office. Cerberus. They never could leave well enough alone, could they? What, exactly, were they hoping to accomplish with this coup? The other races would never rally behind them, not after their very well-publicized pro-human stances. All Shepard could really conclude was that they wanted to sow chaos and confusion and step into the power vacuum. Which made them barely better than the Reapers, at least in her current mood.
Shepard and EDI took positions on either side of the door leading to the executor’s office, and James stepped up to open it. Guns drawn and pointed, they advanced to take in the scene.
Executor Pallin was slumped over his desk, almost as though he was sleeping. The blue trail from the bullet wound in his head put the lie to that scenario. Shepard groaned and opened an omni-tool channel.
“Bailey, looks like they got the executor and two salarian bodyguards,” she said.
“Damn. All right, keep searching,” Bailey replied. “If you don’t see the councilor’s body, don’t count him out yet.”
EDI and James walked around the office, looking at the various items that had been scattered in the struggle. Shepard came over to stand next to EDI as she looked out over the railing to the office area below. She saw a flicker that indicated someone’s cloak was turning off, and the salarian councilor stood up. Shepard breathed a sigh of relief, and started to move towards the stairs.
In the next instant, the councilor was engulfed in a corona of blue light, moving backwards towards the wall rapidly and hitting it with an audible thud. Shepard, EDI, and James drew their weapons and looked around for the attacker.
A figure clad in tight-fitting black armor strode forward, with what looked like cybernetic implants on his face - covering the eyes that Shepard knew should be a beautiful light brown. His black hair looked darker than Shepard remembered, if that was possible. For a moment, Shepard was sure that she had taken a bad hit and was hallucinating. There was no way this could be happening. There was no way that was who it looked like it was. He couldn’t be wearing Cerberus colors, not after his vehement comments on Horizon.
“Alenko?” James asked, and Shepard jumped at the unexpected exclamation. Right. James could have met Kaidan before. In the corner of her eye, Shepard saw EDI lowering her pistol as well.
“Lieutenant Vega,” the figure said, turning his head up to look at the balcony. Shepard let out an anguished cry - it was Kaidan’s voice. She’d know that voice anywhere. “Good to see you again.” His voice was flat, emotionless, seeming to put the lie to his words.
“Alenko, what the hell is going on here?” James said.
Kaidan - no, fuck, it can’t be Kaidan, this is some fucking joke - laughed bitterly. “What does it look like, Vega? I’m with Cerberus, and Cerberus wants the Council destabilized so they can come and take over the Citadel. Fucking weird if you ask me, but no one did, and I’m a good soldier. I don’t question my orders.”
“Kaidan, what happened to you?” Shepard said, finally finding her voice - even if it came out cracked from anguish.
“Commander Jane Shepard,” Kaidan said. His arm was outstretched, pinning the salarian councilor to the wall. He stalked towards the salarian with a cat-like grace that seemed more fluid and honed than Shepard remembered. “First human Spectre. Savior of the Citadel. Former Cerberus agent,” he said, drawing out the last three words. “Back in Alliance colors. Good for you. As for what happened to me - well, that’d be exactly what it looks like. Cerberus took me. Shortly after you defected from them. I wasn’t exactly thrilled with it, at first, but I came around. Now I’m fully onboard with the Cerberus mission. More than you ever were.” He smirked. “Hard to resist when they put the thoughts directly in your head.”
A blue biotic ball came streaking towards Kaidan, from where he’d entered the room, and Shepard’s head whipped to look at Thane. Kaidan dropped the salarian councilor and turned to face Thane, his mouth twisting in a sneer. “Drell,” he said. “You’re in the final stages of Kepral’s Syndrome. Do you really think that you can beat me?” He swung his left hand around and let out a biotic blue flare, and Thane matched it with one of his own. It put Shepard in mind of the fight between Samara and Morinth on Omega.
Shepard forced herself to break the paralysis that seeing Kaidan again had placed over her - and everyone else, it seemed. She made her legs move towards the stairs, not thinking about what would happen when she got down there.
She rounded the corner and pulled out her assault rifle. The two men were still locked in a biotic standoff, though they had shifted while she was running down the stairs. Kaidan dropped his biotics at the same time he dropped to the floor, sliding across it like there was a layer of grease to speed him along. He kicked Thane’s legs out from under him and the drell landed hard on his back. Shepard could see him cough, short of breath, and she took off at a run.
Even as she moved, she knew she’d be too slow. Kaidan’s arm suddenly sprouted a sword, of all things, and he drove it downward into Thane’s heart. The drell gasped, and then fell still. Shepard’s stomach plummeted all the way to the ground.
“Kaidan!” she yelled. A cold, calculating part of her tried to get her to raise her rifle and point it at him again, but she couldn’t. All she saw when she looked at him was the tender smile he gave her after sex, the way his eyes sparkled when she cracked a joke. “What have you done?”
Kaidan kept his eye on Thane a few minutes longer before he looked up at him. Shepard was barely aware of James running past her to the salarian councilor. “I’ve defended myself,” he said calmly.
“He was trying to stop you from assassinating a councilor,” Shepard shouted back. “What the hell happened?”
“I told you already, Shepard,” Kaidan replied, his voice cool. “Cerberus happened.” It was harder to read with the cybernetics, but Shepard still thought she saw his face relax, soften, as he looked over her shoulder. She turned to see -
EDI.
“Eva,” Kaidan said. His tone just about broke Shepard’s heart - the last time she’d seen him, he’d said her name that way. “So you did live.”
“Dr. Eva Coré is gone,” EDI said. “I have control of her body now.”
“Ah. EDI, right?” Kaidan said. The smile lines on his face vanished, a hard and determined expression returning. “The prodigal AI. No gratitude for those that created you?”
“I was assigned to help Shepard,” EDI said. “I am continuing to do so.”
Kaidan laughed harshly. “You just fell victim to the Shepard effect, like I did,” he said. “She draws you in, makes you think it’s possible to do anything. Even if it’s not in your best interests to go so. She makes it so your loyalty to her overrides everything else. Logic, reason, orders.” Shepard thought she saw a brief expression of sadness on his face - but if it was there, it was gone in a flash. “And you pay the price for following her while she gets off scot free. Dodges all consequences. Loyalty to her got this drell dead, just now.” He kicked Thane’s corpse, which set Shepard’s teeth to grinding. Thane deserved better. Some of the shock was starting to wear off, and she was vacillating between anger and crushing despair. She noticed that her off-hand was shaking and tried to take a minute to calm herself.
“They made quite sure I knew why I was being subjected to this,” Kaidan continued. “Or, rather, I should say - you did, Eva. You were the person that brought me into the Cerberus fold. You convinced me of where I belonged.” He took a step towards her, and now there was no mistaking it - his expression had changed again. It was, once again, one that Shepard recognized.
Tenderness.
Shepard was suddenly sure of just what type of convincing Eva had done. Her left hand clenched at her side, and for the first time she felt she truly understood the saying “seeing red”. “That bitch,” she spat out.
“But I thought Eva- sorry, EDI - was with you now,” Kaidan said, affecting a false innocence. “How can you call one of your trusted friends a bitch?”
“It’s not the same, Kaidan,” Shepard replied. Her voice cracked on his name. She was going to start crying any minute now.
“No, it isn’t,” Kaidan said. “There’s no saving me. What Cerberus has done can’t be undone.” His face flickered again, and for a moment, he sounded like his old self. “You can’t save me, Shepard - please don’t try-“
Abruptly, his face was hard again, and when he spoke, his voice was even. “I guess he’s not entirely gone. I - he - loved you very much. That’s why they worked so hard to make sure he - I - knew why this was happening. Because of that love. Because you cared about me, they went out of their way to break him - me.”
Shepard was shaking, head-to-toe, on the verge of a complete breakdown. Once again her mind tried to insist this was some sort of horrendous nightmare. Cerberus couldn’t have kidnapped Kaidan. Cerberus couldn’t have tortured and indoctrinated Kaidan, using EDI’s body to give it a personal touch that, all of a sudden, Shepard could see all too clearly. They hadn’t fractured Kaidan’s mind in the process, making it so that the part of him that loved her was subsumed by the cruel personality Cerberus had implanted in him.
But it wasn’t possible to believe that, not when Thane was bleeding out nearby, impaled on a sword - Kaidan’s sword. The coldly rational part of her mind that had taken over on Akuze was screaming at her again, trying to get her to raise her gun and shoot her damned enemy already.
The fact that the enemy was wearing Kaidan’s face made that impossible.
“I suppose it’s fitting that you take her from me,” Kaidan said, “seeing as how they took me from you.”
“Kaidan-“ Shepard began, not sure what she was going to say.
“Don’t,” Kaidan replied, harshly, “Kaidan me.” It was what he’d said to her on Horizon.
“Shepard,” James said, and Shepard almost jumped to see him next to her. “He does work for Cerberus now.”
“Ah. Someone regains their senses,” Kaidan said. “That’s my cue to exit. I’ll be seeing you again, Jane.” He took off at a run, and Shepard made herself move to chase after him.
By the time she got anywhere close, he had jumped into a car and was speeding away.
“Shepard,” James said, coming up behind her. “We have to go after him. He’s probably going to try for the other councilors.”
Shepard just stood there, staring into the distance.
“Shepard!” James shouted.
“Thane Krios is dead,” EDI said from behind her. Shepard whirled around. Part of her wanted to attack EDI, start spitting curses at that stupid robot body that had been used to seduce and corrupt Kaidan. Her Kaidan. Hands shaking, she holstered her rifle. She closed her eyes and took three deep breaths.
When she opened her eyes again, her face was set in stone. She was Commander Shepard, first human Spectre, and she was going to save the Council. Again. She brought her omni-tool up. “Bailey. We need a car. Ka- Thane died protecting the salarian councilor. The - the assassin is probably going after the others now.” Fuck. She couldn’t afford to be weak. “The assassin is Kaidan Alenko. Formerly Alliance. Cerberus turned him.”
“Alenko?” Bailey said. “He was on your crew, wasn’t he?”
“He was,” Shepard replied, trying to pretend that waver in her voice hadn’t slipped in. “But now he’s an enemy of the Council. Warn them. We’re on our way.” She cut the connection.
“Shepard, are you-“ James began, but Shepard cut him off by whirling around and glaring at him.
“You already know the fucking answer to that question,” she said coldly. “But I’ve got a job to do, so it doesn’t fucking matter. We need to protect the Council. We move now.”
- 5
- 6
- 7
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To Break a Hero