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Leaving the Deep Roads	By : ArchaicLegend Category: +A through F > Dragon Age (all) > Dragon Age (all) Views: 3881 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Disclaimer: Dragon Age and the characters of the game do not belong to me. This is a no profit fanfiction

Chapter List
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He heard the voice through the blue white fire. "She is the reason you are fighting Anders don't turn on her now." He saw the girls scared face..... She was scared of him. Justice raised his arm preparing to strike. 'NO!' Anders screamed but his mouth was not his own. He fought against the walls of his mind, he could feel justice calling up his power. He screamed and pulled his power back cracking Justices hold. Justice pulled, he would have his vengeance. Anders collapsed curling in on himself, he would not let justice do this. Hawke's face swam before him, he could see the faith in her eyes. He drew on that faith like a drowning man gasping for air, slowly he pulled himself back, Justice raged but he was in control now.

"Maker No!" The horror of what he had almost done clawed at him. "I almost...." He saw the young mages face in his minds eye, her eyes full of fear. "If you weren't here...." He looked into Hawkes face, he saw no condemnation, no hatred just a unwavering faith. It was that that broke him he couldn't look at her couldn't look at any of them. "I need to get out of here," he said and fled.
She walked into the clinic alone, it had been a fight to get the others to let her. They had argued long and hard, but had finally acceded with the previso that she met up with them at the hanged man after. She was pretty sure if she didn't show, they would come down here and have a less than tactful discussion with Anders, specifically what she was trying to prevent. She saw him hunched in the back sorting through his papers. She made her way towards him slowly, not wantting to startle him.

She hard him muttering as she approached,"trash... trash.....keep....Trash.. Trash......won't be needing that any more."

She was sure he had heard her approach, he had stiffened but refused to turn and acknowledge her.

"You're upset," she said carefully. "We need to talk about it."

"Upset doesn't begin to cover it!" He snapped, pain and self loathing in every syllable. "You were the only thing that kept me from murdering an innocent girl." He stood turning to face her then, his face motley and tear streaked. "It's all gone wrong......Justice and I we're just a monster! Same as any abomination."

"You were out of control, but even then you heard what I was saying. You knew in your heart that you had to stop."

He looked away from her his voice quiet, "You have too much faith in me... Without you I would never have known who was there until it was too late." Taking a deep shuddering breath, he met her gaze again. She could see resignation in his eyes and that terrified her more than anything else's he had seen that day. "How can I fight for the freedom of mages when I am the example of the worst that that freedom brings."

She went to reach for him but he cringed and she let her hands drop. "Mages are dangerous," she said simply. "That's why this has been so hard." She wanted to shake him tell him to not give up, but that would not help. "Make yourself the proof that they can control their powers."

He shifted moving away unable to face the compassion in her gaze. "I don't know how.... how can I even trust myself to heal anymore... What if that ... Creature of vengeance turns on a patient . Will he.... Will I resist.....or will I loose his fury."

Smiling gently she tried a different tact. "We got rid of sir Ulrich right, Meridith will look down right reasonable in comparison."

"Did you find anything on sir Ulrich?" He asked carefully. "Or was the Tranquil solution just another of my delusions."

She pulled out the letter she had found on sir Ulrich's body and showed it to him. "It exists but it was Sir Ulrichs plan no one else's. "

He lunged forward grabbing the letter, like a drowning man reaching for the surface. "Let me see that." He read quickly his eyes tunning over the lines of text. "The Devine ... Rejected the idea... Meridith rejected the idea ... This was... Not what I expected." He looked at her, something akin to hope returning to his face. "Perhaps I sould try talking to the grand cleric maybe she is more reasonable than I thought... Thank you it will think on what you said."

"And...."

He cut her off, "Please Hawke. I must do this alone." He smiled reassuringly at her, "I... I just need time."

She nodded. "You know where I am," She said simply and squeezed his arm.

He grasped her hand and squeezed it back. "Thank you."

It was not one of her usual clinic days, but she wanted to check in with him, make sure he was ok. She looked around puzzled there were a few patients about being tended by assistants but she couldn't see Anders anywhere. Suddenly she spotted him kneeling down in the back of the clinic near one of the old collapsed shafts. "What are you doing?" She asked as she approached.

"Putting out milk," he said standing, he smiled. "I miss having a cat around. But I think the refugees have scared them off... Or maybe eaten them." He turned to her, "You know I've been meaning to thank you. Having someone like you making a name for yourself in Kirkwall, its done a lot for mages. You're the kind of leader we need, to tell the world we won't be punished any longer for our maker given gifts."

"Ooh I love it when you go all hot headed revolutionary," she said smiling flirtatiously at him.

He looked at her longing and fear etched into his features, "I've tried to hold back, you saw what I almost did to that girl. You've seen what I am, but I am still a man, you can't expect me to resist forever."

A buble of hope blossomed in her chest, after all this time. "I don't want you to resist," she said plainly.

Without preamble he steped forward, one arm curling around her waist he pulled her forward into him. His lips crushed into hers. Years of desire and yearning exploded out from her and she met his fire with her own. Her tounge darted into his mouth dancing with his, the groan of pleasure from him goaded her desire and she slid a hand inside his coat searching for skin. He moved back releasing her. They both quivered like plucked harp strings.

"This will be a disaster, but I can't live without it. We could die tomorrow, I don't want it to be before I tell you how I feel," he said, releasing his breath with a pent up shudder.

Her heart sang in her chest, "I have never felt this way about anyone."

"I thought with justice, this part of me was over." He looked at her, disbelief and desire fighting for dominance. "I can't give you a normal life. If you are with me we will be hunted, hated, the whole world will be against us."

She nodded, she was stepping into this with both eyes open.

He took a deep breath, steeling himself. "If your door is open for me tonight I will come to you, if not I will know you took my warning at last."
She paced nervously, after so long would he actually come. She stopped infront of the hearth in her room, and took a deep breath trying to calm herself. She had asked Bodan to leave the front door unlocked, he wasn't happy about it but did it. She had checked it twice already just to make sure. She watched the fire, she loved the way it danced on the logs, like a living thing. She absorbed herself in the activity, like her father had her do as a child. 'Once she could control the fire outside,' he had said. 'She would be able to control the fire within.' She heard a light footstep behind her, she turned. Anders stood in the doorway caught between apprehension and desire.

"You're here," she smiled the tension releasing from her. "I wasn't sure you would come."

"Justice does not approve of my obsession with you, he believes you are a distraction." He gave her one of his lopsided grins. "It is one of the few things on which he and I disagree." He walked forward to stand infront of her.

"So he's kind of an unwilling participant in our threesome."

He grimaced. "Please don't call it that." She took a step toward him, not touching him, not yet. "When I was in the circle love was only a game, it gave the Templars too much power if there was anything you couldn't stand to lose." He reached forward and cradled her cheek. "It would kill me to lose you."

She leaned into the touch. "You aren't going to lose me."

He lent forward his lips an inch from hers. "No Mage I have ever know has ever dared to fall in love." She could feel his magic flowing in and around her, he moved even closer his lips almost brushing hers. "this is the rule I will most cherish breaking." The kiss this time was tender, the desperation from the morning held in check. She sighed into his kiss, her anxiety leaving her in a rush. She broke the contact but grasped his hand in hers. Years of using a staff had developed callouses on his palms, they were healers hands, fighters hands, the hands of the man that had become so important to her. She tugged on his hand and lead him to her bed. He smiled as he followed, his teasing smile that promised such sensuality and passion. She pulled him down onto the bed and he crawled on top of her. Their hands roamed across each other revelling in the freedom to touch each other. They kissed their tongues dancing playfully. He kissed her lips and throat slowly working his way down to the neckline of her robe. He looked up at her questioning and she nodded. He untied her robe as if he was unwrapping a precious gift. She had been naked under the robe and he let out a small sigh of pleasure. "Maker you're beautiful," he whispered. Delicately running his hands across her skin, watching the goosebumps that developed in his wake. She reached up and started to undo the catches than held his coat on he smiled and stood leaving the bed for a moment. He pulled his coat off slowly folding it neatly and putting it on her desk chair. His eyes stayed on her. When he started to untuck his shirt, she got out of bed and walked over to him, her robe fluttering open. He was not about to rob her of the pleasure of disrobing him. She gently batted his hands away and ran her hands along the edge of his shirt untucking it. With excuciating slowness she pulled his shirt up running her hands along his chest and sides as she did so. He grasped her face and kissed her deeply drinking her in, she responded with ardor, running her nails lightly up his back. He shivered and closed his eyes briefly. She pulled back and pulled his shirt over his head. It was the first time she had seen him with no shirt. He had the strength of a fighter but also the softness of a scholar. He was, in her eyes, the most handsome man she had ever seen. She kissed, licked and nipped her way down his chest running her hands over as much skin as she could. She trailed her tounge down the dusting of hair that lead from his belly button to the waistband of his britches. She could feel his cock straining against the fabric. She smiled, he had also forgone the niceties of small clothes. Slowly and carefully she tugged the waistband down, his phallus sprang free. She looked up at him a twinkle of mischief in her eyes. He stared down at her his pupils dialated, his breath comming slow and shuddering. She pushed him back gently until he bumped into the desk. He grasped the edge with his hands, his white knuckled grip the only sign of his own anxiety. She smiled up at him and carefully trailed her tounge from the base of his shaft to the tip, running it around the tip for good measure. His sharp intake of breath told her it had been a while. Smiling she sucked him him to her mouth, the groan he released made her pussy throb. She ran one hand up his chest while the other cuped his balls as she slowly langerously, moved her mouth along the shaft. She took him deep, massaging the tip with the muscles in he back of her throat.

"Maker," he gasped as she did this for a third time. She drew him in and out, licking, swirling and sucking till he quivered like a fly stung horse. She looked up at him her gaze hazy with lust. In one swift movement he pulled her up, and turned her so she was leaning against the desk. "My turn," he said his voice husky with pleasure and desire. There was a frenzied moment where he threw off his britches and shoes, pulling her slippers off as well. He came to her naked, just as the maker had made him. She drank in the sight of him, "If you keep looking at me like that I might not be able to restrain myself," he said chuckling cradling her face in his hands.

"I thought we'd gotten over this restraint business," she said pulling him against her. The table was just at the right hight, his phalus brushed her nether lips.

He shuddered with the effort of his control. "Not yet sweetheart," he said grinning wickedly and kissed her. Slowly he moved his way down her body, he paused at her bountiful breasts and sighed drinking her in. He traced rings around her nipples with his tounge then gently sucked one of them into his mouth, she moaned with pleasure, thrusting her chest forward involuntarily. He ran his hand down her body to her throbbing cunt. He lightly grazed his fingers across her full nether lips. She bucked against him hungry for more. She could feel him smile against her breast, with consummate patience he moved his mouth to the other breast and dipped the top of one finger into her pussy. She bucked driving it deeper. He tutted and settled one hand on her hip holding her still, while with the other he deftly penetrated her as his own langerous pace. He used his thumb with consummate skill applying pressure to her sensitive clit. She tried to move to thrust forward but he held her in place. Slowly tortuously he fucked her with his fingers until she was begging for him. Caught between intense pleasure and the pain of frustrated release.

"Anders," she gasped. He released his grip on her and pulled her to the bed. She moved onto it and beckoned to him. He crawled up her naked body his skin sliding against hers. She shivered with pleasure her body on fire with sensation and wrapped her legs around him pulling him up until his phallus brushed against her damp pussy.

"Are you sure?" He asked holding himself above her.

She smiled at him, and ran her fingers along his jaw line. "Yes."

Carefully he positioned himself, gliding inch by glorious inch into her. Using her entwined ankles she pushed him into her as deep as he would go, he made a guttural sound as he slid in to the hilt. She shuddered with the pleasure, reaching up she pulled his face down to hers and kissed him slowly. They stayed still for a moment enjoying the sensation of finally being together. Then he began to move, he started slow, but there were too many years of desire between them. She moved with him, driving him harder and faster with the heels of her feet. He reached between them and fingered her clit. She made inarticulate sounds as her pleasure mounted. He drove her higher, his own pleasure almost to much to handle. Using her heels she pushed him in hard and deep as she climaxed hard around him. He cried out and years of pent up sexual tension exploded within him releasing with a hot spurt of semen. They lay there breathing hard, neither able, or willing, to move.

"Maker," she breathed running her hand through his tousled hair. "We should have done that ages ago."

He chuckled, "probably."

She stood by the fire, her mind wandering over the lovemaking session of the previous night a smile playing on her lips. She heard him come up behind her his arm sliding around her turning her towards him.

"I love you. I’ve been holding back from saying that." He looked guiltily away. "You should have a normal life, not be tied down to a fugitive with no future, but I don’t ever want to leave you."

There was a burlp as his stomach growled. She smiled his grey warden metabolism was going to keep Orana busy. "Want a sandwich?"

He laughed caught aback. "You will be an inspiration to generations of romantic poets." He touched her face, true joy shining in his eyes. "So not to bring up anything unpleasant," he shifted uncomfortably. "But the Templars were sniffing around my place yesterday. It's possible I will need somewhere else to go ... In the near future... Would here be an option?"

She would say yes in an instant if he wasn't so cute when he was uncomfortable. She smiled cheekily, "Are you asking to move in?"

"Well... Yes..." She could see the tension in him a deep uncertainty that he tried to hide with humour. "I thought you might appreciate not having to step over the drunkards in dark town every time you want to see me.... What do you say?"

She gasped his hands smiling reassuringly. "I want you here....till the day we die."

Relief broke across his face, like the sun through clouds. "For three years I have lain awake every night aching for you..." He cradled her face in his hands. "I am still terrified I'll wake up."

The kiss that followed was long and deep. She heard his stomach burble loudly again and pulled away.

"First lets get you some food, then you can find some inventive ways to thank me."

He ginned, "I think I can manage that."
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Leaving the Deep Roads