Skywalkers

7: Pillow Talk

When Leon woke in his own bed, night had fallen. Most of the house was dark as well. In fact, the only light he could see was the nightlight from the bathroom that lit whenever no other light was present. He immediately looked for Cloud - and found him straight away. The blond had brought in a chair from the kitchen, just as Leon had done that first day, but instead of sitting across the room, he had settled directly next to the bed. And in the process of waiting for Leon to recover, he had fallen asleep, his head supported by his crossed arms as they rested on the mattress.

Memories floated back into Leon's consciousness as he lay there. Bits of remembered emotions flickered through his heart and head. He could still feel that hunger for battle bubbling below the surface, but it was just a quiet sensation now, quite unlike the fire that had taken him while he fought Zack. Leon realized, as he thought about it, that not once during that fight had he felt fear or even thought about himself at all. All his thoughts had rested with Cloud: to free him from his prison, to avenge his pain, and to protect him from ever being hurt by anyone again.

Carefully and gently, so as not to wake the other, Leon lifted a hand and ran his fingers through Cloud's hair. It was strange, he thought, how strongly he felt about the blond, how much he wanted to help him. Perhaps it was because, unlike the countless women who fawned over him at his book signings, Cloud didn't want to be protected. Not once had he asked for help - quite the opposite, he had attempted to push Leon away several times so as to protect him. It hadn't worked, though; Leon had stayed right there by him whether Cloud liked it or not, and he had absolutely no intention of ever moving.

Eventually, Leon's senses began to prickle, and he stop musing long enough to realize he was being watched. He let his gaze focus on Cloud, and sure enough, the blond's eyes were open, just barely visible in the near-dark. Quickly, Leon pulled his hand away. A soft sound of protest escaped the other man as his fingers fled.

"You didn't have to stop," he murmured with a hint of annoyance. "It felt good."

Leon swallowed, unable to think of anything to say to ease the embarrassment of being caught petting the sleeping blond. "You're awake," he settled on after a moment, even though it sounded stupid.

"You are, too," Cloud returned, apparently undisturbed by the whole thing. He pushed himself into a sitting position before asking, "How do you feel?"

"Perfectly fine. No different than normal."

"No side effects then. Good."

"Cloud." Almost without knowing it, Leon's hand reached out and gripped the other man around the wrist. He really didn't want to ask this question, but he also knew that he needed to know the answer. "What did Zack do to me? At first, I thought he was going to make me into a Skywalker, too."

Cloud sighed and looked away. "So did I, and I'm ashamed to admit it. Zack and I promised each other that, even if someone asked for the treatment, we wouldn't give it until he knew exactly what it entailed." His posture slumped slightly. "I … thought he had forgotten."

"So what did he do?"

The hand that Leon didn't have trapped came up to support Cloud's head. "I'm not entirely sure," he answered. "He obviously gave you an enhancement package, but I don't think that was all." He paused, and then in a sharp voice that commanded response, he said, "My sword is called First Tsurugi. How many parts does it have?"

"Six," Leon replied immediately. He blinked. What the hell?

"What weapon did Reno use?"

"An EMR." That piece of information Zack had volunteered, so it didn't seem as strange. But then:

"What does it stand for?"

"Electro-Magnetic Rod." Where the answers were coming from, Leon had no clue. His mouth moved on its own without his input.

"How many blades does the Souba have?"

"Two. What the hell? Cloud, how do I know this stuff?"

"What kind of weapon is Dual Hound?"

"A pile bunker. Okay, that's enough! I've never even heard of a pile bunker."

Cloud sighed and met Leon's angry eyes with a look of resigned calm. "He gave you memory inserts. Sounds like the basic weapon package along with the advanced. And from the way you fought yesterday, he undoubtedly gave you several martial arts packages as well."

"Memory inserts?" Leon echoed, confused and more than a little nervous.

"It's nanotechnology combined with chemical stimulants. He basically implanted years worth of studying and training directly into your brain."

"Are you saying," Leon asked slowly and deliberately, "that I have a bunch of tiny machines in my head doing things to my brain?"

"Yes."

"Pardon me, but I have to go be violently sick now."

"It's not that bad," Cloud assured him, using the hand he had just released to push him back down before he could get out of bed. "Most of the work is already done. That's why he attacked you. The surge of adrenaline stimulates the nanomachines, causing them to work faster and embed the information deeper. It also assists the enhancement package since the increased blood flow makes it easier for the chemicals to reach your muscles as quickly as possible. But still …" He broke off and looked away, obviously upset. "I could just kill him for doing that to you. If your body had rejected the program, or if they hadn't worked fast enough, you could have been seriously hurt. If that had happened, I never would have forgiven myself."

The pain in Cloud's voice stirred something inside Leon's chest, and he found his concern for himself fading away before the need to do something about that sadness. He reached out and took Cloud's arm again, this time just above the elbow.

"It's okay. I'm okay. You don't need to feel guilty about anything."

Cloud's free hand came around to cover Leon's. "Thanks."

"Do you have mechanical bugs in your head, too?"

Even in the dark, he could see that smile clearly. "Yeah. Lots more than you do."

"Then I should be fine. Right?"

"Right."

For the next few minutes, Leon just lay there and gazed at Cloud's profile. He didn't need the light to know what it looked like. He had seen no one else but Cloud for the past several days, after all. So the fact that he knew just where the lines and curves on the other's face lay, the fact that he knew without seeing how far down the blond's eyelashes brushed when he closed his eyes and just how much of his ear was covered by that mess of hair - these things didn't bother him. However, he did realize, after a while, that something he hadn't known about Cloud until today was in the forefront of his mind and waiting to be discussed.

"Cloud?"

"Hmm?"

"Sephiroth is your boyfriend?"

The hand fell off of his. Leon felt a nasty pang of pain and guilt at its absence.

"You were awake for that?" Cloud asked quietly.

"Yeah. Enough."

Cloud's arm twitched, and Leon realized the other man didn't want to be touched anymore. Reluctantly, he removed his hand and drew it back. The ugly feeling gnawing at his gut increased.

"He's not my boyfriend."

The tone in the blond's voice was warning Leon to drop it, but he couldn't help himself. "Ex-boyfriend, then?"

"No." How could one word hold so much anger, regret, and pure, raw hurt? "The word 'boyfriend'," he continued, "implies that one of us cared for the other. And that I had a choice."

Leon felt ragingly sick again, but this time for a much different reason. He remembered how Cloud had taken Zack's punch, as if being hit was commonplace to him. Was this the life he had run from? Coercion? Abuse? Dear god … rape?

"I am gay, though," Cloud added in a much lighter tone. He offered a small smile in Leon's direction. "Sorry for not telling you."

"It's okay," he answered immediately. "It's not exactly something you flaunt around."

"Am I going to be kicked out of the house?"

Leon snorted in spite of himself. "Hell no. If I hated gays, I'd have to lump my little brother in with them. Sora swears blind that he's actually bi."

"Didn't you tell me he's been dating the same girl since he was thirteen?"

"Yeah. That's why no one believes him."

Cloud chuckled a bit at that, and Leon couldn't help but smile. Cloud just had that effect on him. It truly made Leon happy to see the blond happy, and when he was upset, it hurt so much. If Cloud were a woman, Leon would swear he was falling for him.

"Leon?"

Cloud was chewing his lip again, and the hesitant expression on his face was just too damn cute. It made Leon want to laugh, but he restrained himself. "Yeah?"

"You feel pretty normal, right?"

"Yes."

"Do you feel well enough to … well … cook?"

This time, Leon let himself laugh. "Hungry, are you?" he accused.

Cloud had the decency to look sheepish. "Well, yes. And your cooking is so much better than mine, that I thought …" He trailed off in a painfully obvious fashion.

With a melodramatic sigh that was pure acting, Leon threw the covers off of himself, making sure to smack Cloud with them, and got out of bed. "Fine," he replied, pretending to be quite put out. "I'll cook for you and your bottomless stomach."

Cloud pulled the sheets off of his face and offered Leon a half-smile through the darkness. "Thanks," he said quietly.

Leon paused a moment and gazed at him. Even with the poor visibility, he could see that something was wrong with the other man. Clearly, something still bothered him. Most likely the lingering remains of guilt. Offering as encouraging a smile as he could, Leon leaned over the bed, placing his hands on the mattress to support himself, and looked into Cloud's eyes.

"No problem." He cocked his head in the direction of the kitchen. "Let's go."

As they walked down the hall, he commented, "I'll call Sora tomorrow. We need to leave, right? We can go visit him."

"Yeah," Cloud replied, a few steps behind him. "Sorry about that. To you and to him."

"It's no problem. I own the house. Sora just lives there while he's attending school."

"Oh. Okay then."

Leon tried to hide the cringe that had crept up on him at the other's tone of voice. Something was definitely wrong with Cloud. Perhaps he was just starved. Leon could at least hope that was it. He sure as hell hoped it wasn't something that he couldn't help solve. He didn't think he could handle being unable to help anymore.

In the kitchen, Leon pushed away these thoughts, opened the refrigerator, and bent down to look inside. Cloud leaned against a counter to wait. Out of the corner of his eye, Leon saw the blond pick up an oven mitt, and almost immediately, his sad scowl had morphed into a grin at the memory of the prank he had pulled on Leon a few days ago. Leon shook his head and went back to examining his meat selection. Really, Cloud was too adorable, and Leon had become quite strongly attached to him. If he were female, Leon would have asked him out a dozen times by now.

Although really, what did gender have to do with anything?

Crack!

"Ow! Fuck!"

"What happened?" Cloud asked, concerned. He dropped the mitt on the counter and walked over to Leon who was rubbing the back of his head.

"I stood up too fast and cracked my head against the handle of the freezer."

"Ouch," the blond sympathized. Opening a nearby drawer, he rooted around until he found a ziploc bag. "Here, move. I'll fix you an icepack." He pulled Leon out of the way, opened the freezer, and began filling the plastic bag with ice cubes. When he had finished, he found a hand towel, wrapped it around the full ziploc, and, walking to behind Leon and pulling his hand away, placed it on the spot that he had smacked.

"I can hold that, you know," Leon offered, feeling suddenly quite embarrassed.

"No you can't," Cloud returned. "You have to cook, and you need both hands for that."

"Sweet Shiva," Leon muttered, relishing the way the usage of Cloud's favorite epithet made the blond laugh.

So Leon proceeded to cook chicken with a white wine and caper sauce, white rice, and steamed asparagus with a mayonnaise-based garlic dip. Cloud trailed after him the entire time like an extra appendage. More than once, Leon tried to get the other to give up the icepack, but Cloud refused, especially once there was food to look at over Leon's shoulder and perhaps sneak tastes of when he was occupied. Leon attempted to keep these illegal forays to a minimum, but unfortunately, his thoughts from before kept him from policing his work as efficiently as would be normal.

Could it be true that he was falling for Cloud? He already knew that he loved him, quite possibly as much as he loved Sora and the rest of his family. But was he falling in love with him? He hadn't ever thought of the possibility that he could be bisexual. He had never looked at a man in that way before. But, then again, he had never really looked at a woman before Rinoa. And since her, well, no other woman had stood a chance.

But could he be sexually interested in a man? As he cut up the asparagus into smaller pieces that would fit inside the steamer, Leon considered this question. When Cloud was near him, he didn't really feel sexually-charged. There was no romantic spark when they touched or brushed against each other. But then again, Leon was approaching thirty. His teenage hormones had burned off long ago, leaving him with more control over his body and urges. So, instead of relying on the clichéd symptoms of love, he brought up an image of making love to Rinoa in his head. He felt a gentle flush settle over him as he thought of her throaty moans and her euphoric expression. Then, he forcibly changed the image to be Cloud beneath him in order to gauge his reaction.

"Whoops," Cloud commented as a piece of asparagus shot out from under the knife and ricocheted around the sink. "Lost one."

Leon didn't comment. He was trying to get his hands to stop shaking. At the thought of making love to Cloud, a wave of heat had washed over him and blood had rushed to areas of his body that it had avoided for years. Leon was suddenly very, very aware of the blond's body behind him and the way it pressed up against his back whenever the sneaky brat tried to snatch a piece of garlic or dip a finger into the sauce. Yes, he decided calmly within his mind, I am sexually attracted to Cloud.

And that, as far as he was concerned, clinched it. He was bi, and he was falling in love with a rogue Skywalker on the run from someone who sounded extremely dangerous if not insane. It didn't matter from what angle he approached the situation. Leon was fucked. Massively and completely fucked.

xXx

That night, after a dinner where Cloud ate like a famine victim and Leon pushed his food around and around on his plate, Leon lay on the air mattress and stared at the ceiling. He suddenly had a hell of a lot of things to sort out. Like how all of this related to his marriage and his memories of Rinoa. As far as he was concerned, he had still been grieving up until a few days ago; he wasn't entirely sure he was done now. And even though she had told him on the phone that she wanted him to be open to another love, it still felt like a betrayal on some level. He had fully intended to stay single for the rest of his life.

And then there was Cloud himself. The blond obviously had issues with this Sephiroth guy, and from the little he had heard, they didn't sound pleasant or easy to work through. Even if Cloud felt attracted to Leon, he probably wouldn't be open to a relationship any time soon. And Leon knew that if he was going to take up anything with the other man, he wanted it to be serious and meaningful. He had never had a "just sex" relationship with anyone before, and he certainly wasn't going to start with someone as beautiful and precious as Cloud.

Leon's thoughts kept him awake long past midnight. Which is why he noticed when the bed beside him creaked and the sheets shifted with the movement of the body within it. Feet hit the floor on the other side of the bed and made soft shuffling sounds as they wandered away. At first, Leon thought Cloud was on his way to the bathroom, but the door never opened. After several minutes of waiting, Leon couldn't take it anymore; he sat up and looked around.

Cloud stood by the window on the other side of the room, leaning against the wall with arms encircling his waist and eyes staring into the darkness outside. He looked deep in thought, although the small crease in his forehead told that those thoughts were not entirely pleasant. Carefully, Leon extracted himself from his covers and walked slowly over to join him.

"You're awake," Cloud remarked quietly when Leon was close enough to hear.

"Couldn't sleep," he answered truthfully.

"Me neither."

Silence bore down upon them. Unlike most of the quiet times they had shared, this one was oppressive, and Leon fidgeted slightly under its weight. He had settled himself against the wall on the other side of the window, and he pretended to look outside while covertly observing Cloud instead. The blond looked tired and pale. He had closed down his face to all emotion, staring robotically out at nothing. Leon wondered what the other was thinking to cause such a complete shut down, but he didn't want to intrude by asking.

But then, Cloud began to tell him anyway.

"Sephiroth was my hero once. When I was a kid. A lot of people looked up to him, me included."

"Cloud," Leon cut in, feeling like he should, "you don't have to talk if you don't want to."

"I know. I want to."

So Leon let him.

Sephiroth had been a famous general, a war hero. And then, five years before their planet had been destroyed, Sephiroth had been assigned to a mission in Cloud's hometown. Zack, another elite soldier, had been held up on a mission in another location, and Cloud had just been a foot soldier then; neither of them went on the mission. Something had happened, resulting in the entire town burning to the ground and Sephiroth disappearing from the face of the planet.

"Everyone died, including my mother and a girl I had been close to as a child. I was devastated for a really long time. Everyone said it had been an accident, but I couldn't help but think that Sephiroth had caused it. That it was somehow his fault."

He skipped over his activities for the next five years, only mentioning that he had quit the military and that he and Zack had parted ways for a while. And then, Zack had reappeared, claiming that the company that ran the military had been investigating Sephiroth's disappearance and had made a breakthrough. They were sending Zack back to the destroyed town, and Zack wanted to know if Cloud wanted to come. He said yes. So, with Reno in tow - Reno had worked for the company in a role that sounded half CIA, half hit man - they had gone to the place where Sephiroth had disappeared.

And found him. He had become a Skywalker on his own, using the remains of another Skywalker named Jenova and the bits of research he had found in an old mansion in the town. He appeared before them as they were investigating and yanked the three of them back with him, spouting omens of death and disaster. To Cloud's surprise, the predictions had been true, and within hours, the entire planet had been destroyed due to a large meteor impact. Zack, Cloud, and Reno had just happened to be in the right place at the right time. That was the only reason they had survived.

Cloud had sunk into depression a second time. He couldn't believe he had lost everything yet again. In his anger and grief, he heaped the blame for both directly onto Sephiroth. It turned out the fire that had taken his town had in fact been the other man's fault, caused by his home-made transformation and the explosion of energy it released. The meteor had not been of Sephiroth's doing, but Cloud blamed him for not doing more. For not saving more people or warning them so that they could try to avert the disaster. All of the respect he had once had for the man turned ugly and violent.

And then, for no apparent reason, Sephiroth had decided that he wanted Cloud for his own, and whatever Sephiroth wanted, he got. The poor, unenhanced blond hadn't stood a chance against a Skywalker who had been legendary even before his disappearance and who had spent the past five years honing his skills. Just as Leon had feared, Cloud had been bound, beaten, raped, and worse. And then Sephiroth had started enhancing him against his will, injecting him with program after program until Cloud feared he was more machine than man.

He cried as he talked; honestly, how could he not, saying those terrible words out loud? But the way the tears came down - slowly and without being acknowledged by the one who shed them - Leon doubted they were doing any good. He also became increasingly concerned by the way Cloud seemed to be forcing his words out. He had said he wanted to talk, but the more he listened, the more Leon felt he had lied. When he had talked about Rinoa, the words had come out freely, acting as a kind of release, but Cloud was obviously having trouble speaking about these things, and they weren't helping him in the slightest.

"Sometimes I think he singled me out because I stood up to him. No one had ever done that; he was used to being bowed to and worshipped, even as a Skywalker. After all, he's still the only one who's managed to recreate the transformation without the PHS program. But I was so angry that I threw my hatred for him in his face. I yelled at him, ignored him when he tried to talk to me, and generally treated him like the scum I thought he was. I must have fascinated him, and with Sephiroth, it's a very small step between fascination and obsession."

Cloud sighed and tightened his arms around himself. It was a small movement, but Leon noticed it. "I wonder," he said softly, "if I had kept my feelings to myself and pretended to be grateful, maybe he would have left me alone."

Leon had successfully held his tongue the entire time, but he simply could not let that one go by uncontested. "Is that supposed to mean you think it's your fault? That's ridiculous." He took a step closer and seized Cloud's shoulders in his hands. "It's not your fault, okay? It's all that sick bastard. No one should have to go through what you have."

Cloud nodded sadly, and before Leon realized what he was doing, he had gathered the blond into his arms. They were normally the same height, but Cloud's depression had affected his body, causing him to stoop slightly. His head fell into place on Leon's shoulder as Leon crossed his arms behind the small of the blond's back and pulled him close. Cloud's own arms remained trapped between their chests.

"It's not your fault," Leon repeated as he felt Cloud tremble slightly. "Not you. Never you."

"You're so kind to me," Cloud replied. "I don't deserve it."

"Of course you do," Leon argued immediately. "You deserve it more than anyone."

"But you've done so much. You opened your house to me, took care of me when I was injured, fed me, bought me new clothes … I just feel like I should pay you back somehow."

The tone of Cloud's voice had dulled, much to Leon's surprise. But he shook it off and responded to the words instead of the way they had been spoken. "You don't need to repay me. I wanted to do it. Plus, I'm a trashy romance novelist. I have plenty of money." He chuckled lightly, hoping that Cloud would do the same.

The blond, however, did not laugh, and the life in his voice died even more. "I wasn't talking about money."

Warmth suddenly pressed into the area between Leon's legs, and he inhaled sharply as a blast of pleasurable tension engulfed him. Cloud had shifted his hand and was now stroking Leon through the sweatpants he wore as pajamas. His fingers moved with confidence, expertly teasing and encouraging Leon's arousal. Before Leon's mind could completely grasp what was happening, he was fully erect.

"It doesn't feel any different, you know," Cloud whispered in his ear, letting his breath blow over the sensual areas of Leon's neck. "If you shut your eyes, you can pretend I'm a woman. Pretend I'm your wife." He ran a finger and thumb down opposite sides of Leon's length, then circled his whole hand around at the base and slowly rose, letting the cotton of the sweatpants slide along with him, creating a marvelous, soft friction. His other hand had risen to the back of Leon's neck, holding him in place.

Leon shuddered. His eyes closed and his head rolled to one shoulder against his will. It had been so long since someone else had touched him. But this didn't feel right. "Cloud …" he managed.

"Shhh," the blond interrupted. "Don't think of me. Think of Rinoa."

No, this was wrong. It was so wrong. Cloud's hand was driving him to distraction - sliding sweetly up and down, pausing now and then to circle his thumb over the head or drift his fingers down to massage the testicles. But somewhere in his rapidly clouding brain, Leon knew he didn't want this. He didn't want Cloud to try to hide behind a memory. He wanted the blond to demand that Leon think of him and only him.

Leon opened his mouth to tell the other man to stop, but at that moment, Cloud leaned his head closer to Leon's neck and latched onto him. He sucked gently, pulling up Leon's skin into his mouth between his teeth where he teased it with his tongue. Coherency slipped away, and Leon could only moan in abandonment as the pleasure wracked his body. But when he felt cooler air touch his hot skin, he realized Cloud had used the neck attack as a distraction so that he could remove the hand behind Leon's head and bring it down to his pants. While Leon had given himself up to the new sensation, Cloud had pulled out Leon's elastic waistband and carefully slipped it over and down until the fabric rested mid-thigh. And now he was pulling away slightly with the obvious intention of kneeling down and continuing in that manner.

Leon's head was spinning. He was about to get sucked off by his primary love interest, and while in most cases that would be a good thing, in this particular instance, it was quite bad. He knew enough about himself to know that he would never be able to resist a blow job, so if he was going to stop this, he needed to stop it right now. But how?

The answer came to him with the sight of Cloud's face as it passed. The blond had kept his face hidden in Leon's neck until then, but he couldn't help allowing a glimpse of his expression as he prepared to kneel. As Leon looked at him, he saw … nothing. No desire, no contentment, no emotion at all. Nothing except, perhaps, the tiniest bit of resignation.

Leon understood at once, and he knew what he needed to do to confirm it. Quickly, before Cloud could distract him with anything else, he reached up, grabbed the other man's shoulders, and leaned in to kiss him.

Cloud backed away.

Panting slightly, Leon let his head fall forward as he continued to hold Cloud at arms' length. "I thought so," he gasped. "You don't want this either."

"What do you mean?" Cloud asked after a moment's pause. "I want you, Leon."

Leon ground his teeth. Never in his life had he heard those words spoken with less conviction. Even when his editor forced him to do readings of his trash writing, he attempted to at least put a little feeling into it. Cloud hadn't even tried.

"Really?" he replied with a hint of skepticism. Again, he pushed forward and tried to kiss Cloud. Again, the other man retreated. "If you want me so much, why won't you kiss me?" he demanded.

Cloud said nothing, only looked away. Leon took the opportunity to pull up his pants and cover his quickly fading erection before continuing, "You feel guilty, don't you? Guilty for what Zack did to me without my consent. For bringing your problems into my life. For getting me involved when you didn't want to. So you thought you'd open up to me like I opened up to you with Rinoa. You told me about Sephiroth, even though you weren't ready. I could tell; you didn't want to be saying those things yet. But you did it, and you discovered that it hadn't helped. If anything, the guilt had increased. So you did the only other thing you could think of. After all …" he paused for a moment and swallowed, beginning to feel sick again, "… you've given up your body without consent so many times, what difference would one more time make?"

"It's okay. It doesn't matter."

The dead words plunged deeply into Leon's heart, and he found himself grabbing Cloud by the shoulders again, shaking him a bit to get the other to look in his direction. "It does matter!" he cried. "You should never give yourself to anyone if you don't want to, not for any reason. Your body is yours, Cloud, and no one else has any claim to it whatsoever."

Cloud's eyes had slid shut, and his face was pinched as if trying to keep himself in check. He nodded once and lifted a hand to cover his eyes. With a small sigh, he dipped his chin and leaned forward just enough to touch the top of his forehead to Leon's. "I'm sorry," he whispered after a few heartbeats of silence.

"Don't be. It's okay."

They stood like that for several more minutes, simply being together. All of the awkwardness and oppressiveness of before had finally disappeared. Leon felt the last vestiges of his arousal fade away as he just concentrated on his breathing; he was more than happy to see it go.

Eventually, Cloud shifted slightly and confessed, "I'm tired."

Leon sighed a little and smiled. "Me too," he replied. Dropping one hand, he slipped the other around both of Cloud's shoulders and led him to the bed.

Once he had tucked the blond safely beneath the sheets and fussed with the blanket a bit, Leon backed away to return to his own mattress when Cloud's voice stopped him.

"It must be pretty uncomfortable for you on the floor," he said, his tone carefully guarded. "The mattress is too small. Your feet fall off the end."

Leon blinked at the blue eyes that were gazing at him. "Sora's shorter than I am," he commented, not believing what he was hearing.

"I doubt it's healthy either, now that it's getting colder."

Cloud was being careful, but Leon knew exactly where this line of thought was going. He hesitated briefly, but the almost-hidden plea in those blue eyes made his decision for him. Cloud had taken the left side of the bed, so Leon slipped in on the right. The blond said nothing as Leon settled himself on his back and pulled up the covers; he just watched and then, briefly, when Leon looked over at him, smiled and shut his eyes. They weren't touching; there were at least seven or eight inches between them. But it didn't matter.

Leon realized as he shut his own eyes that this was the first time he had shared a bed with another person since Rinoa's death. He reasoned that he should be feeling a bit concerned by that, but he couldn't bring himself to feel anything other than peacefully content. He realized something else as well. As far as falling in love with Cloud was concerned, it was no longer an action in the present or future tense. It was most solidly in the past. And as Leon slipped off into sleep, he realized that this particular bit of information didn't bother him. Not in the slightest.