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Depths of memory	By : blackdiamondprincess Category: Kingdom Hearts > Slash/Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 2393 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 8
- 9
- 10
___________________________________
8. Until death do us part
___________________________________

New Xillion City, spring 2004

Thursday morning, 4.36 am

I remember how hard it had been raining that night as I
carried Sora into the emergencies of the hospital. He had passed out in the car
when we were only halfway. His face was dangerously pale by the time we entered
the building and he was barely breathing.
The receptionist behind his counter only shot us one
glance and immediately started calling for assistance, seeing Sora's state in
my arms.
It didn't take long before a group of hospital staff
arrived with a bed and medical equipment. Sora was put on the bed, still
unconscious and examined quickly.
"Low blood pressure; 90/40.
Normal eye pupils." The head doctor rapidly
spoke, now listening to Sora's breathing.
"Petechia
on his right hand and swollen lymph nodes." One of
the infirmaries said, holding Sora's right hand in hers. I got to see the red
spots she was talking about briefly before the doctor said they would take him
to oncology for an x-ray.
I frowned and wanted to follow them, knowing that
oncology had something to do with tumours and cancer. "What's wrong with
him?" I asked repeatedly, but no one wanted to answer me as they rushed
Sora to oncology on the 3^rd floor, leaving me behind as I was forced
to stay out of their way.
I spent the next 2 hours waiting outside the intensive
care they had taken him into, all possible scenarios running through my head,
each one worse than the other. I couldn't sit still, wondering if this had
anything to do with what we did, and that if it had, that this was going to be
my entire fault� I had failed once again to protect him, I let this happen�
"Riku, where is he?"
My head shot up and I saw Cloud and Leon standing
next to me. "What happened?" Cloud asked, his worry coming through
his words forcefully and making me feel even guiltier.
"I woke up this morning from a nightmare and Sora
came to comfort me about it. I don't know what happened after that; he suddenly
started to pale and cried out in pain, asking me to take him to a hospital.
Halfway here, he blacked out. I've been here for two hours now�"
"Did they tell you what's wrong with him?" Leon
whispered, sitting himself next to me.
"No," I said in exasperation, "I've
been sitting here worrying ever since they took him in. I don't know what I
would do if�" I didn't finish my sentence, not wanting to even think about
the possible ending.
"Did he tell you anything about�I mean,
before�?" Cloud inquired and I gave him a questioning look. I was suddenly
thinking about what Sora whispered as he doubled over in pain.
"Why now�?"
Sora had known that this was going to happen... And I
suspected that Cloud knew what was wrong with him, by the way he had hastily
rephrased his sentence.
"You know why he's ill�" I whispered slowly,
looking at him suspiciously. He didn't answer and I could feel an untamed rage
boiling up inside of me; everyone knew about Sora's condition apparently, but
me. Didn't they know how much he means to me?!
Cloud bent his head and closed his eyes, "If he
didn't tell you, then I shouldn't be the one to give it away."
I was angry now, not believing this. I had spent two
hours waiting and he still wasn't going to tell me!
"How can you still stand there and not fucking tell me what's going on?! For all I know, Sora could be
dying in there and you here know what's wrong with him, but not willing to
fucking tell me!"
I felt Leon's hands
pulling me back down in my chair; I didn't even realise that I had taken a step
closer to the blonde, ready to strike him with my clenched right fist. I
violently freed myself from Leon's grip,
feeling such anger that I barely knew what I was doing anymore. I took a few
steps, not wanting to have anything to deal with Cloud, just because he was
keeping some very important information on Sora from me. But then, another
thought crossed my mind and I stopped dead in my tracks.
Why didn't Sora tell me?
"Masako Riku?" A voice from behind me
suddenly said.
I spun around and ran over to the blonde nurse
standing by the doors of the intensive care.
"Yes! What's wrong with him? Can I see him? Is he
okay?"
She smiled serenely, "He's awake, and he asked
for you. Please follow me."
I followed her to a room at the end of the corridor
where Sora was lying in a bed, wired to different apparatus. I didn't know
exactly what I had expected to see, but this sight was, simply put� horrifying.
He was sickeningly pale; his mouth was covered by a
mask providing him oxygen, his breathing shallow and raspy and his forehead
glistening with sweat.
"You have ten minutes." The woman behind me
whispered before exiting and closing the door.
The soft beeping sound of the pulse oximeter and his breathing were the only sounds in the room
as I approached him. He seemed to be asleep.
I sat myself next to him and watched him, not knowing
if it was a good idea to wake him up.
"I'm not going to die if you just touch me and
I'm not contagious you know�" He hoarsely whispered underneath his mask,
his eyes still closed.
I felt tears run down my face then, as I took his left
hand in mine carefully, fearing he'd break and leave me again. I was so
frightened.
He opened his eyes slowly and looked at me with a small
comforting smile, "Riku�"
"No�" I whimpered, refusing to look up at
him because of the shame I felt towards him. I was supposed to protect him! And
there I was, crying like a child because I was afraid. He looked so fragile�
"Baby, look at me." He whispered softly,
"Please."
I raised my eyes up to him reluctantly and he smiled
tenderly, cupping my face with his right hand.
"This is not your fault." Sora said,
"It's mine."
I frowned slightly, "Your being ill is your
fault�?"
"The reason why you're feeling guilty about this
isn't your fault." He corrected me. "It's mine."
I frowned in confusion and he just smiled again,
averting his eyes sadly and taking off his breathing mask.
"Did you call uncle Cloud?"
I nodded.
"Did he tell you the true reason for why I'm
here?"
"No, he wouldn't tell me." I scowled,
"He was making such a big deal about it, telling me you were keeping
something secret or�"
"I have leukaemia."
"�something like�What�?"
I whispered, startled. "S-Sora�?"
Did I hear it correctly?
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier�" Sora
sadly whispered, closing his eyes, "I didn't know how you'd react."
"Leukaemia�?" I stupidly echoed, not wanting
to believe anything of this.
He simply nodded and sighed, "Chronic myeloid
leukaemia� Ever since I was a child�"
"B-but�"
No! I didn't want to believe it!
"Why? Why?! We just found each other again!"
I whimpered, holding his face in my hands now, wanting to hear him say that it
all wasn't what it looked like, that he was coming home with me right now.
"We were supposed to� this time we�" I ended up crying as he trailed
his eyes away from mine, my words drowning in my tears.
"I know it's hard�" Sora slowly whispered,
starters of tears glistening in the corners of his eyes now. "And I know
that the time I have left maybe isn't much, but I need you to accept this,
Riku, please� If you really�"
I looked up at him, stubbornly shaking my head, not
wanting to hear it. Because if I did, it would mean that this really was
happening.
Sora was slowly dying.
And there was no way of stopping it.
It was his soft series of sobs that made me realise
fully what was happening and that he needed me to be strong for him and support
him along the way.
"Sora�" I whimpered, taking control over my
own emotions, "No, please�"
His whole frame was shaking as he wept and I suddenly
realised that I hadn't seen him cry like this before� He seemed so� broken
down, so desolated�
I made him look at me, our eyes locking. I did not
want to see those glimpses of despair in those beautiful depths anymore. He
couldn't give up because of me. "Please stop crying, Sora� I'm
sorry�" I wiped away the tears rolling down his face, "I didn't mean
to�"
"Riku�" He embraced me, "I'm scared,
but it's easier now that I have you� Please, I�"
"I won't leave you," I whispered, "I
want to spent whatever time is left for us with you. I love you, Sora."
"I love you too, Riku." He sobbed in relief,
holding me tighter. I could feel his heart anxiously beat against my chest,
"I'm so sorry I didn't tell you." He kept whimpering, his warm tears
falling on the shoulder of my jacket and his hands spastically wrinkling the
fabric in between his fingers. I never felt his love come through so strongly
to me than back then. Never did I imagine love this intense to exist.
"You'll never be alone, I promise Sora."
He seemed to calm down a bit and I held him to me like
that for a few minutes until I couldn't hear him sobbing anymore. As I
disengaged our embrace I found him sleeping in my arms; his emotional outburst
had taken the last of his strength. I laid him back on his pillow and put his
breathing mask back on his face before bending over and kissing his forehead
softly.
"I'll take care of you, Sora�" I softly
spoke as I watched his resting face, "It's only going to be you and me... Until the end of times."
___________________________________

New Xillion City, summer
2004

Saturday afternoon, 1. 54 pm

"Surprise!!"

Sora gasped as the door to our apartment revealed a
crowd of people standing behind it, throwing confetti in the air merrily.
I walked up behind him with a smile and ushered him
inside so I could close the door.
"You guys!" Sora squeaked, his face growing
red with embarrassment. A woman with long wavy honey brown hair walked up to
him and they fell into each other's arms. "Mom!"
I learned to know his family during the long hours
spent by his side in his hospital room and the numerous visits he received from
friends and relatives. Kamiko, Sora's mother, had
proven herself to be a great source of support for both
Sora and me, and became like a second mother to me.
All the guests now laughed and he then turned to me
with an accusing stare, "You!"
I gave him an innocent shrug and he threw his arms
around me whispering his thanks. "Welcome back, babe."
Kairi and I had decided to throw him a welcome back
party after his three month stay at memorial. In those last weeks that had
passed, many changes had occurred, some good, other bad, depending on how you
wanted to look at it.
Kairi was now involved with none other than Sephiroth Nobuhiro. Talking about frickin'
coincidences� apparently they met on that night she went out on that blind
date� I of course had lashed out at her and demanded for her to break off the
relationship, yet soon came to realise that the bastard was really making her
happy and that, in the end, that had been all I had ever asked for her to be.
She moved out of my apartment
2 weeks ago and lived with him in his condo on Coliseum Street on the
western side of the city.
I let her go, not only so she could follow her heart,
but also because I knew she needed the space after what happened to her father
and his company.
Mr Kuro, her father, left the city 2 months ago after
his company had been suspected of fraudulent activity. Apparently, the new cell
phone he had invented could do more than just read it's proprietor's
fingerprint, but also had a very sophisticated tracking system that gave him
access to the client's personal data. It was never known what exactly what he
had intended to do with the information. Yet his flight spoke against him in
many ways.
Cloud had prohibited me from doing Mr Kuro's campaign for his new mobile even before his true
intentions were out and I'm happy I did what he told me to. Ever since that
affair I never questioned anything when Cloud made me do something.
Almost a month ago, I got to hear that one of the
biggest modelling agencies in the world had asked for me to represent one of
their male models� My work on the Von Aglio fashion
show had impressed quite a few and made my name a rather known one, my face
popping up in almost every fashion/woman/cosmetic/gay �magazine I could think
of. I hadn't decided what I would do
yet, because just a week after that news, Cloud came to tell me that the
pictures Sora had taken for the magazine a while ago had been noticed and that
some important people were starting to get interested in his work. I didn't
tell Sora yet, because I wanted to keep it as a surprise for him for when we
would be alone.
Our relationship had grown tremendously over those few
months and I was more convinced than ever that I couldn't live my life without
Sora in it.
Yet on the other hand, I knew that we both had dreams
and aspirations we wanted to follow and that right now, those were knocking on
our door.
Sora's health was not in immediate danger anymore, but
the fright he had procured me that night three months ago wasn't one I wanted
to experience any time soon. I wanted to take care of him, support him along
the way and there was only one way I could think of to do that efficiently.

I watched with a soft smile how Sora talked with his
acquaintances, vividly explaining something and making everyone laugh. His
life-force seemed to be more alive then ever and his renewed cheerfulness was
illuminating the whole room.
I silently waited for him to come to me as the
afternoon passed and turned into evening and most of the guests left.
"Riku, you've been sitting on that couch almost
all day! Come and dance with me!"
I looked up at him and took his right hand in mine. He
was absolutely beaming with happiness and I couldn't help but get infected.
He giggled and made a spin, moving his body to the
soft reggae tune that was playing. I watched him dance around me before I took
him by his hips as he stood in front of me again and held him close, sensually
making our bodies move to the music.
"It feels so good to be back in your arms."
He whispered against my right shoulder, "It feels good to be safe
again."

I kissed
his forehead and held him closer against me. It indeed felt good, even more
than good; it felt like heaven.

___________________________________
11.49 pm

An expectant smile was plastered on his face as I
entered our room, his left leg crossed over his right and his naked foot
bouncing up and down coyly as he sat on the end of our bed.
Kairi, Sephiroth and his mother just left and the
house was empty except for him and me.
I watched him from my position against the now closed
door and returned his smile with a smirk as he slowly raised his hands up to
his chest to unbutton his shirt. His period of illness had thinned him a
little, but it hadn't affected the gracious lines of his body. He looked just
as appealing as he did three months ago, maybe even more. He still aroused all
of my senses.
"Dr Dhillon said we can
have sex� as long as we use plenty of lubrication�" He slowly whispered,
crawling backwards up the bed and nestling in its centre.
I bit my lower lip, watching with a hungry eye how he
unbuttoned his jeans, "I'm glad she said that� those were three pretty
long months�"
Sora giggled as he rested his body weight on his
elbows, "Yeah, they were�" He lay down, tilted his hips upwards and
slowly pushed his jeans down, "Even when you spent the night, I could tell
it was becoming pretty frustrating�"
I was already taking off my shoes and t-shirt while he
was talking, not caring if I seemed impatient; he had said the magical words:
We. Can.
Have. Sex.
He bit his lower lip and giggled some more as I jumped
on the bed, "Tired of waiting?"
"You can't even imagine�" I groaned back,
now on top of him and catching his lips with mine in an eager kiss. The next
moment his jeans were flying across the room and landing on my desk.
He was smiling up at me, brushing my hair falling in
between us behind my ears. I kissed him softly on his inviting lips and brushed
the tip of my nose against his, endlessly grateful that he was lying there
beneath me, loving me as much as I loved him.
We made love, tenderly and passionately for hours until
he fell on top of me breathless and sweaty, the afterglow of our joining
shining off of him.
I held him close, kissing his forehead repeatedly and
feeling how his smile grew against my chest.
"I need to tell you something." I softly
whispered, staring at the ceiling pensively. A sensual purr came from the mass
of hair on my chest and I chuckled. "But first let me congratulate you on
your outstanding performance of earlier. I mean, wow�"
He giggled and pressed a kiss against my skin,
"Why thank you, you weren't that bad yourself."
We both laughed and he looked up, bent down and
pressed his lips against mine in a loving kiss.
"Now before you get all horny on me again�"
I softly spoke with a smirk, feeling him nuzzling and kissing my throat
enticingly, "I need to tell you something important."
He pulled back reluctantly with a grin. "What is
it?"
"Remember the last Von Aglio
photo shoot? The swimwear one?"
He winced, "I screwed up, didn't I?"
I rolled my eyes to the ceiling, trying my best to
hold back my growing grin, "No actually you did pretty well."
Sora looked at me suspiciously from the corner of his
right eye, "Ok�? What are you not telling me?"
"Oh nothing�" I shrugged, still not looking
at him, "It's just that Cloud asked me to give you this and for you to
call the number on it." I reached over to my bed side table and took a
card that was lying on it, handing it over to him.
He frowned and read the card.
"Oh my god."
I chuckled, "Is that what it says? Did I give you
the wrong one?"
"Riku!"
He breathed out in astonishment.
I could barely maintain my laughter after that,
"Cloud said you should give them a call."
"It says 'Rubens&Rubenz'"
Was all he could say after a while, still flabbergasted by the news.
"Yes, babe."
I laughed, "Give them a call."
"Rubens and Rubenz�
I�" He whispered, taking hold of his face in disbelieve. "How is
this�They're like the biggest photography association
in the world�I � Call them?!" He looked so confused I couldn't help but
think of it as utterly cute.
"You know that action you do when you pick up the
receiver of that machine next to the bed and start dialling the number on that
card?" I gave a significant look at the piece of paper he was still
holding. "That same card you're crumpling up in your hand?"
He fell silent as he opened the piece of paper in his
right hand and looked at it for a long time.
"What's wrong, babe?" I softly whispered,
sitting up and resting with my back against the headboard as he slid his body
off mine. I watched him wrapping a part of the sheets around his hips and
sitting himself on the right end of the bed. "Sora?"
He sighed and closed his eyes, "I've wanted
something like this to happen for so long now�"
I smiled and scooted closer to him, moving myself so I
could sit on my knees behind him. "Then what's wrong?" I kissed him
on his right shoulder, nuzzling his soft skin there.
"I've also wanted to be with you for so
long�" He softly spoke, turning around to face me now, "If I call
them and they accept me, I would have to leave you, and I wouldn't be able
to�"
"Hey," I interrupted him, "Don't do
this to yourself."
"But I can't�" He started to whimper,
shaking his head.
"This is your chance; you can live out your
dreams�" I softly whispered, coaxing him to look up at me.
"No Riku�" He whispered in a small voice,
shaking his head more fervently.
I took him in my arms again and kissed the crown of
his head with a soft smile. "I have something else to tell you."
"Good news?" He sniffled and I unwillingly
chuckled, holding him tighter.
I just decided to tell him. "Cristobel
International has asked me to represent one of their male models."
"Cristobel International
Models?" He whispered back softly and I nodded.
"I know that this is great news for you and I want to be happy, but I
can't�"
One warm drop fell on my left shoulder and I held him
closer.
"I don't want to lose you�" He softly
whispered through his tears. "But I can't just�" He didn't finish his
sentence and he didn't have to, I understood perfectly.
I simply held him tighter and rocked our bodies back
and forth soothingly. "I don't want you to renounce on your opportunity
either and I don't want to separate from you." I let go of him and wiped
away his flowing tears with my thumbs as I held his face in my hands. "I
don't want you to go where I can't take care of you."
He sniffled and closed his eyes, "I won't let you
let that offer pass just because of me." He sternly spoke, shaking his
head determinedly.
I smiled at him and brushed his hair back, admiring
him and thinking of these past three months in which I've learned to not live
without him. "There's so much I would do just because of you."
He started to sob and shook his head, not wanting to
hear it. I needed to make him understand that he was my life, my reason for
still being here, for breathing. That he was my all.
I stood up from the bed and walked over to my closet
where I fished a small, black velvety cube out of a leather jacket.
He was still looking at me with those teary eyes as I
sat myself down next to him on the bed.
"I love you so much, Sora�" I started,
taking his hands in my left one. "I need you everyday�" I produced
the black box from behind my back where I had kept it hidden with my right
hand. "The thought of you not being close to me is one I cannot bear."
Those beautiful pools of sapphire grew wide as I
opened the box.
"700 years ago you came and found me and gave me
your love. You changed my life so much that I even died for you."
One tear rolled out of his left eye as I took his left
hand. "Riku�"
"3 months ago you came back into my life and we
fell in love again; the best thing that ever happened to me." I smiled
gently as he sniffled and brushed his hair back with a hand and sighed.
"Sora I want to take care of you for as long as I
can, I want to be with you for as long as I can." I whispered.
His tears were running freely once more as we looked
into each other's eyes, although he was trying his best to hold them back.
"Remember what I told you that night in the taxi
after the movie? I told you that we belonged together and that
I would never let you go." I whispered to him and chuckled as he closed
his eyes and nodded.
"Well, I'm not a man who breaks his word. I'm
never letting you go, Sora." With that I got on one knee in front of him.
Yes, in the nude, but I guess it would accentuate what I would say next to him.
He gasped in total surprise as he realized what I was
doing.
"And therefore I come to you as a man, no more,
no less." I softly whispered, now taking the silver ring from the box and slipping
it on his left ring finger. "And I hope that you will take me as I am when
I ask if you, Sora Haruki, want to marry me."
He looked at the ring on his left hand ring finger and
covered his mouth with his trembling right hand. "Oh my god� This is�Oh my
god�!"
"Well? What do you say?" I softly, yet
nervously asked him, locking his eyes with mine. "Will you marry me?"
___________________________________

To be continued�

-BDP-
- 8
- 9
- 10
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Depths of memory