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Tectonic Shift	By : DoveCG Category: +G through L > Jak & Daxter Views: 1520 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Jak & Daxter, nor anything else in their franchise. I make no money writing this. I doubt anyone would pay me for it anyway.

Chapter List
- 1-Tectonic Shift
- 1
Author's Note:
I'm about to dump some FEELS all up in this. You have been warned.
I personally prefer Erol for the flesh and blood human, and Errol for the cybernetic version, but I generally don't like using both in the same story, because I feel it looks sloppy. Sorry if that annoys or confuses anyone.
Also, Keira/Erol is one of my OTPs, but for this story... well... I thought Jak/Keira was the right focus, and anything but what I wrote here, which is equally plausible, would have made it weird. The other focus is of course just Erol, because I love him to death.
The NoSex tag may change, depending on how I decide to handle a few things. Hence why I left the rating in the middle for now.
This entire story was inspired by another one, called Second Chance. It's on FF.net. :)

“Great grass grubs, Keira! What were you thinking? This is an enormous task you've taken on; a responsibility that will last until you die!” Samos said, “Even if he's no longer out to destroy the world, it won't be the same as having your long lost friend back!”
Keira's voice was soft but strained, as tears streamed down her cheeks.
“I know.”
Jak could only stare, watching everything as if he were in a trance, his brain unable to comprehend what had happened. The old man irritably rapped the end of his staff into the rocky floor, waving his hand dismissively, because there was no convincing her now. Keira simply swayed where she stood, eyes closed, while cradling a red-headed child in her arms. The little boy looked to be about five or six, as far as Jak's guess went. Judging from the way Keira shifted him in her arms, she was getting tired of holding him already, but she refused to set him down. Was she afraid he'd disappear if she let go?
Jak stepped forward and held out his arms, offering to take the child from her. He knew his expression was grim, he couldn't help that, and Keira looked skeptical when she noticed his unspoken request. When he simply remained beside her, waiting, blue eyes pleading with her, she finally handed the boy over. Jak huffed as he settled the kid against one lean hip, but he was used to carrying Daxter around all day. The child suddenly clinging to his neck wasn't much heavier and Jak was used to the uneven distribution of weight. Jak smiled, but couldn't keep the bitterness out entirely.
When Keira saw that he wasn't about to hurt the boy, she began rubbing at her eyes and ruffling the kid's short, fiery hair. The boy blinked at her and then looked up at the blond hero holding him, his golden eyes open wide with curiosity and confusion. He looked so different now, with rounder, baby fat cheeks. All of his formerly sharp and manly features were softened with childhood, and Erol's less severely tapered ears and smooth freckled face were naturally untouched by grey ink. The boy was so small and helpless in Jak's arms; the complete opposite of the mechanical abomination that Jak had shot in the face with a morph gun and yet still a world away from the adult who had arrested him, when Jak first landed in Haven. In fact, little Erol reminded Jak vaguely of his younger self, down to a similar pair of brown overalls, but with no hat, no shirt, no pendant, and no ever watchful crocadog.
The last time Jak had seen himself as a toddler, getting onto the rift rider with the younger Samos, felt like a life-time ago, even if it had only been about a year or so. Unfortunately, just looking at little Erol brought up other, worse memories, unbidden. Thank goodness children looked so cute and Jak had reservations about murdering them! He was tempted to remove Erol, before the kid could become a problem a third time, but that wouldn't be fair. Not that Jak was certain he understood what was truly fair anymore.
Why did the Precursors have to grant every wish? Were they stupid or just plain crazy? Jak's heart had gone out to Keira, when she'd run over to the platform, pleading with the Precursors before they left, until he heard what she was asking for. Then he just had stood there, unable to believe his ears. As usual, the ottsel leader had warned about making wishes carefully, but Keira had insisted.
Whatever. She'd regret it soon enough and it'd be her own fault. For now though, he needed to deal with this the way he dealt with anything else, as if everything could end at any moment and Jak was the only one who could do something about it. He couldn't back away from this. At least a kid was less of a crisis than what he usually dealt with. Children could be reasoned with and they were only as good as the person who had raised them.
“Hi, Erol,” Jak said.
“Hi...”
Erol sounded very quiet and uncertain. Jak softened at that. He understood shyness. It was probably worse, if Erol had no idea why he was here or where here even was.
“Do you remember how you got to Spargus?” Jak asked.
Erol shook his head. Keira seemed startled and she stared at Jak. Apparently she hadn't even considered whether or not the kid would know what was going on.
“What do you remember?” Keira asked.
Erol's little brow furrowed, thinking hard. His shorter, gently tapered ears shifted back and down, as worry began to overtake him.
“I don't know,” Erol said, “I was playing in the kitchen... and now I'm here? Is this a dream? I want to wake up! Where's mommy?”
Keira gasped softly and placed a hand over her mouth. Then she looked from Jak to Samos.
“That's a good question,” Jak said, “Keira, do you know?”
He hadn't meant to corner and prod her with it. Whatever she'd just realized was probably painful and he doubted that she had an answer for Erol, but Jak was in a bad mood and he felt like spreading it. Daxter and Tess were off arguing with Torn, Ashelin, and Pecker about something. Possibly Erol. There was no one else free to cheer Jak up right then. Keira was understandably more concerned about the child that she had quite literally received from the gods than Jak's irritability.
“I... I... she's gone, sweetie,” Keira said.
Jak glared at her. What the hell? Erol simply blinked, not understanding the implications.
“Don't lie to him about that!” Jak said, “What if it doesn't work out? What if you don't have what it takes? Then you're going to tell him they're alive again, all of a sudden?”
Keira glared back.
“I'm not lying! His father went first. He was in the Krimzon Guard and... he was a casualty of the Metal Head war,” Keira said, “And his mother was in a zoomer accident. They're both... they're both gone. There is no one else, as far as I know. He didn't talk about his family much.”
Jak glanced down at the kid in his arms. Erol didn't seem to entirely understand what Keira had said, but he knew it wasn't good. He looked frightened and alone, even while being held. Jak sighed and gently rubbed the kid's back. Keira crooned softly and kissed the boy's face, which finally brought the kid to tears. Erol didn't know who they were, what they were saying, or why he was there. Jak felt helpless in the face of that knowledge, and finally handed the kid back to Keira, who set him down and promptly fell to her knees, so she could continue to kiss his forehead and hug him close. Erol began to sob and wail, overwhelmed apparently. He didn't struggle, flinging his arms around Keira's neck instead, his words muffled equally by tears and flesh, as he buried his little face into her shoulder.
“Daddy! Mommy! Daddy! Where are you?! Mooom-mmmmy! I wanna go home!”
“It's okay! It's okay. I'm so sorry! It was bad enough the first time, right before you joined the KG. I mean, I wasn't there, but you told me. Now you're so little,” Keira said, “But it'll be okay! I'm here for you. I'm Keira! Do you remember me?”
Erol shook his head while weeping and continued clinging anyway, because he wanted to be soothed. At least the kid trusted them. Jak really wouldn't have known what to do if Erol didn't. He looked to Samos for guidance, but the Green Sage was simply staring at his daughter and sighing. The short, grouchy, old man stepped forward, scowling at the tantrum Erol was making, but saying nothing. The tiny bird, that lived on the log in the sage's hair, flapped its wings, disturbed by the yelling maybe, and landed on top of Keira's head, before settling into its new perch. That got Erol's attention and it temporarily distracted him from his sadness. Keira looked annoyed at first, before she noticed the effect it had on the boy. Then she stroked Erol's fluffy hair.
“Do you want to hold the little bird? It's very nice,” she said, “Just remember, you have to be gentle with it.”
Erol nodded, but hesitated, before he held out his chubby hands, which the bird hopped into readily, as if it knew. The boy sniffled, amazed. He very carefully lowered his arms, cradling the warm ball of blue and yellow feathers to his chest, as if it were something magical and wondrous.
Jak couldn't keep out the ghost of a grin and he crouched down as well, before ruffling the kid's hair. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad, after all?
“Ohhh, no!” Daxter said, “We are not bringing home any strays! I mean it! Especially not that one!”
His best friend wandered over, with the other three in tow, looking very pissed off.
“Of course not!” Keira said, “He's coming home with me and daddy! We can make room for him.”
Jak frowned, not certain he liked the sound of that. It had been easier to stomach when he thought about this as a problem that could be solved and therefore gotten rid of. That sorting the problem out made it real, whole, and very permanent was unsettling. Jak had asked about the reality of the situation, before it had fully settled into his mind that there was a reality. Now that he was suddenly facing it in full, he didn't like it one bit. Erol was going to get in his way, but this time there was nothing Jak could do about it, and the hero highly doubted the little jerk would make it easy for him by being a sore loser and accidentally killing himself all over again. Not that the results of the NYFE race had turned out that well, in the end.
With bitterness rapidly taking over and leaving a bad taste in his mouth, Jak walked off at a fast, hard clip, wanting to put some distance between himself and what was bothering him. When he heard his best friend yelling after him, Jak didn't stop. Daxter managed to catch up and leapt up onto his shoulder guard anyway. It was an action that Jak was suddenly, unbelievably grateful for, though it did nothing to deter his escape or alter his current mood.
“Whooo! You're really bookin' it, brother!” the ottsel said, “Not that I blame you! Who wants to hook up with a girl who has a kid?!”
Jak glared at his friend, just as the Spargus garage came into view.
“So you'd dump Tess if you got her pregnant?” Jak asked.
He hadn't meant to be so point blank about it, but he couldn't help himself. Jak was generally direct to begin with, and in his foul mood, he saw no reason to soften the verbal blow. Daxter winced, ears quickly flattening back defensively.
“That's different!” Daxter said, “It'd be my kid, and at least I'd get to have some fun in the process! Couldn't she have asked to let you knock her up first, and then pop Erol out?”
“Yeah... fun,” Jak said.
Jak growled, eyes narrowing. Not that he'd ever looked after any kids other than himself, briefly, but he knew that their general helplessness made it very hard to get laid. Definitely strike one against Erol.
“Hey, ease up a li'l,” Daxter said, “She's still your girlfriend, if ya want 'er to be!”
Jak frowned as he surveyed the row of dune buggies on display and made his way towards the Tough Puppy, without really considering the particulars behind his choice. As he climbed in and revved the engine, he felt Daxter shift on his shoulder armor, tightening a surprisingly strong grip for the inevitable possibility of falling out the window and getting battered by the rough sand dunes that Jak intended to tear across, hoping the speed and brief freedom might clear his head. Daxter whined as he braced himself, obviously not wanting to leave Spargus, but also refusing to leave Jak's side when Jak was clearly so upset and in need of a friend.
“Jaaaak!”

“But why did you do it?” Tess asked, “If you really wanted a kid, I'm pretty sure Jak would've been willing to help you out with that. And Erol, of all people! Why Erol?”
Tess had volunteered to accompany Keira and Samos to Keira's small but comfortable two bedroom apartment, then decided to stay for the night. It was a whim, but an important one, now that she was there to see why her instincts were correct. She wasn't as close to Keira as the boys were to one another, they hadn't known each other as long or clicked together as well, but she had a feeling that her friend needed someone to talk to. Keira had begun crying, not long after she tucked Erol into her bed for an afternoon nap. The mechanic girl was gently petting a hand through the boy's tousled orange hair as he snoozed, already exhausted by the turbulent day he'd had.
Tess walked across the mattress and sat down beside him, honestly afraid to touch the child. She'd never had any direct contact with Erol before, when he was human or cybernetic, but she'd heard enough terrible stories to make her wary, even though he was just a small child right now. That Keira had willingly asked for the man's return was unfathomable, in spite of Tess knowing a thing or two about their prior relationship.
“I... I never really thanked him, for all he did,” Keira said.
Tess snorted and rolled her eyes, but she chuckled slightly.
“Yeah, he did a pretty good job of wrecking Haven,” Tess said, “Twice.”
Keira actually glared at the blond ottsel, understanding it was a joke, but reacting seriously anyway.
“Not that!” Keira said, “I know he's done a lot of bad things. I'm not stupid. He hid it from me, at first. I was too naive and new to Haven to understand, but I did find out. It took longer than it should have. I didn't want to believe that he could be as bad as the rest of the Krimzon Guard or the Baron!”
Tess nodded and patted Keira's arm, trying to apologize and console. Keira sighed.
“But he took me in, when I first got here. I didn't understand what that really meant. He did threaten to arrest me, at first, but I could see he didn't want to. He was alone. And... I convinced him. I used him,” Keira said, “He was obviously powerful. I knew he could protect me, if I lead him on. It wasn't that hard; a nice, handsome guy like that and he already thought I was cute. I wanted to repay him, later, but he wouldn't let me.”
That got a pair of furry ears up in a flash; primed and curious.
“He didn't let you?” Tess asked, “That doesn't sound like Erol! Are you sure he didn't have an identical twin brother or something?”
Keira smiled, rolled her eyes a little, and shook her head.
“No. It was all him,” Keira said, “He was lonely, Tess. His family was gone, and he didn't have any friends, that I knew of. His fault for being a callous jerk and pushing people away, but I'm pretty sure he could tell it was his own doing. I think he was afraid he'd get hurt, if he opened up to them, or maybe he just didn't like people. Anyway, I tried to help. I wanted to be there for him.”
“He was also a ladies man, if the rumors were true,” Tess said, “Love 'em and leave 'em, you know?”
Keira nodded, though she wouldn't look up as she idly plucked at a fold in the sheets.
“Yeah,” Keira said, “I think... I think he loved me, Tess. Really loved me. Maybe he loved some other girls that way before, but he said he had problems making a commitment. And yet, he never left me. Not in two years time or... oh, Tess, I didn't love him that much. I felt so guilty about it, even though we only kissed a few times. Then he showed up, and I didn't know what to do!”
That last part left the ottsel perplexed.
“Who?” Tess asked, “Jak?”
Keira bit her lip and petted Erol's little hand, where it rested against the pillow, before cupping her own much larger one completely around his loosely curled fist.
“That was also hard,” Keira said, “I couldn't just abandon the poor guy, after all Erol had done for me. He had feelings, even if he was a jerk to almost everyone. And Jak was kind of scary, at first. Of course, I know why now, and even if Erol didn't have a hand in... in all that, he did arrest Jak. But no, I meant when Erol came back cybernetic.”
“Whoa! Really?” Tess asked.
Tess hadn't actually seen Cyber Errol at any point, but from the way Daxter had described him, it chilled her blood just thinking about it. Keira simply nodded.
“Just once, at the garage, before the stadium was crushed,” Keira said, “No one else was around. I was so shocked and scared. And... I rejected him. I broke his heart, Tess. I knew it, but I couldn't change what I'd done! I didn't know where he'd gone or how to reach him. I felt so awful.”
Tess frowned.
“Hey, don't feel guilty about that,” Tess insisted, “A huge KG robot that looked sort of like your dead, crazy ex-boyfriend? I'd be scared too!”
Keira gave a short, humorless bark of a laugh, her expression pained.
“No, I should,” Keira said, “It gets worse. He saved my life that day! I don't think he knew that the palace was going to come falling down, since Jak said Veger was actually the one behind that, but Erol scared me so much, that I left the district! After I slapped him, because he tried to kiss me. I'm such a horrible person!”
Tess simply stared as the confession swirled around in her mind, like leaves on the wind. Then she shook her head and hugged Keira's arm.
“You didn't know that at the time! And it's not your fault that Erol tried to destroy the world,” Tess said, “Everyone is accountable for their own actions and he was already attacking Haven. Even if he wasn't, I doubt you could have gotten through to him after he started talking to the Dark Makers. He was always kind of power hungry... And I think you loved him more than you realize! You asked the Precursors to bring him back to life, and you just rolled with it, when they returned him as a little kid instead of an adult!”
Keira began to cry more. Tess wasn't certain what to do, other than to keep hugging, until Keira carefully scooped the ottsel up and hugged her back. It was weird, but Tess didn't mind being held by her friend. She shifted her attention from Keira's arm to her neck, and was more than willing to hug the poor mechanic, as long as it would help fight against the anxiety that was slowly consuming Keira.
“I think I screwed up again!” Keira said, “I could remember enough to rebuild the Rift Rider, a time machine of all things, and I couldn't even get this right! What am I doing? I wanted to give Erol a better life, to make up for all the pain he went through, but I can't be a mother! I don't know how! And now Jak hates me...”
Tess clucked her tongue gently, chiding the mechanic.
“He doesn't hate you!” Tess said, “Well, maybe a little. Jak's as scared as you are right now, except he didn't know this was coming! Why didn't you ask him first? Other than the fact he probably wouldn't have said yes...”
Keira sniffled.
“I... I sort of didn't plan it,” Keira said, “I didn't think I'd be meeting the Precursors! I guess it would have been better, if I'd known. Then maybe I could have thought about it more, before I... and now it's like an accidental pregnancy! But I'd never make Jak play daddy, if he doesn't want to. It's not his burden, it's mine, and I love Jak enough that, even though it hurts, I won't make him stay.”
Tess nodded, silent because there wasn't much to say to that. The unhappy woman began to ramble, her shoulders hunched in shame and misery.
“Sometimes I actually hated Erol for not telling me sooner,” Keira said, “For allowing Jak to be tortured like that... but it sounds flat when I say it. And I'd never really hold that against Erol. I still don't know if he knew what would happen. I think he did, though. I think he was trying to save me from a similar fate. But I should hate him... oh, why did I do this? It's all too much!”
Tess nuzzled her head under Keira's chin. It was really more the action of a pet or a lover than a friend or a Precursor, but Tess hoped it would help anyway. It seemed to. The tension in the young woman's shoulders and arms eased a little.
“Just tell me one thing,” Tess began.
Keira shivered, her voice very faint as she replied.
“Okay.”
Tess glanced at the little boy. Erol was breathing softly as he continued to sleep beside them, his eyes shifting under tightly shut lids as he dreamed, completely oblivious to the conversation. Keira followed her gaze and an unbidden smile tugged at the young woman's lips when she watched him.
“When you look at Erol, do you still want to give him everything?” Tess asked, “Or do you resent him too much? Can you ever hold him, and not start thinking about the past?”
Keira stared down at Tess with wide green eyes, red-rimmed and blinking, oblivious to her own unconscious reaction a moment ago. Then she nodded, still sniffling, and she hesitated for a moment, before setting Tess down to pat Erol's baby-soft cheek and trace her fingertips along his gently tapered ear, which twitched slightly under the light touch.
“I... I think,” Keira said, “That I never want to let go. That's what really scares me.”
Tess nodded and waited. It wasn't long before Keira continued talking while rubbing the little boy's back through the covers. Erol sighed and shifted in his sleep, cuddling the pillow tight and moving closer to Keira, which made the young woman smile faintly.
“I could give him up for adoption, and then it would be simple, but that isn't fair,” Keira said, “I did this to Erol; he didn't have a choice, and I want to be there for him. I want to help him make friends. I want to see him fall in love again, and when he's all grown up, live out the rest of his life with a really wonderful person. Maybe even a family of his own. Because... the past is the past. Right now, I just want him to be happy and healthy.”

Keira paused as a realization struck, and she leaned over to snuggle the little boy curled up beside her. He made a soft whimpering sound, but still didn't wake, as her smile grew broader and less wavering.

“Yes,” Keira murmured, “I want to give him everything.”
Tess felt her own eyes grow moist and her throat constrict, truly touched by Keira's words.
“Then you're going to be a great mother,” Tess said, “Congratulations!”

It wasn't until after Jak had walked back to his waiting crowd of friends, the antidotes to Krew's poison safely in hand, that the idea was conceived. It gestated while he celebrated with them in the bar. Even the revelation of Rayn's betrayal couldn't stop the thought from being born, kicking and screaming into the world, as Jak entered the Port, with Daxter walking beside him, instead of on his shoulder. It meant that the hero had to walk slower, so that his best friend could keep up, and even though he wanted to rush headlong through the streets on an unattended zoomer, Jak forced himself to take his time. After all, there was no reason to dive straight into what he intended to do.
“Are you sure?” Daxter asked, “I've asked about fifty times already, but I'm goin' to keep askin' until you actually do it, because I still can't believe you're gonna do this!”
Jak chuckled and glanced down at the ottsel, while Dax craned his head back to see him. He knew that had to be uncomfortable, but Dax was determined to get around on his own more, now that there weren't any obvious threats to their well-being.
“I'm sure,” Jak said, “I don't know if I really opened Rayn's eyes to the light, but after talking to Blitz about his father, and seeing how much he hated the man for abandoning him, I think I need to make sure someone else doesn't end up just like him.”
“But Jak, this is different!” Daxter said, “You're not that kid's sperm donor! He doesn't even know there's a reason you should hang around! Hell, there isn't! You didn't contribute anything to makin' Erol! You took him out, twice! Sort of.”
Jak frowned and sighed.
“Yeah, we killed that mistake, masquerading as him. Not that the real thing was much better,” Jak said, “We also talked the Precursors into showing themselves, when they wanted to honor us. If it wasn't for that, Keira wouldn't have gotten her wish. Besides, I don't think they would have done it, if they thought it would endanger the world again. And if they would anyway, that means they expect me to make certain Erol grows up not wanting to in the first place!”
Daxter stopped and it took a few minutes for Jak to notice. He turned back to face his fuzzy companion, puzzled, but Daxter looked far more worried than petulant. The ottsel held out his hands beseechingly, his thick tail lashing side to side with agitation.
“This is really big, though. I don't want you to do it, just because you feel like you should!” Daxter said, “Part of the reason Blitz was so pissed off was 'cause his daddy didn't love him enough! You're only gonna make it worse if ya hate the kid, and decide to force yourself into it for some dumb reason like the Precursors are expecting you to! In fact, this Precursor thinks that you shouldn't!”
Jak didn't have a retort for that, so he went with the other obvious reason that Daxter might be upset.
“You're worried it'll cut into our wild drunken parties and carefree lifestyle?” Jak asked.
Daxter snorted, apparently angry that any of that had been brought up at all.
“Of course I am!” Daxter said, “But that's not the point! I know what it's like when people, who don't like you, make themselves take care of you anyway! It ain't exactly pleasant, pal. I know why Blitz lost his shit, trust me. I felt that way a couple of times back in Sandover. You're the only reason I didn't bludgeon anybody to death with my goggles. That and I'd probably break 'em... the glass... in the goggles. And puberty took its sweet time gettin' around to me!”
Jak walked back to where his best friend stood and crouched down, so that they were eye to eye. The hero felt embarrassed, but sincerely sorry for the upset he was bringing to their now mostly tranquil life together. It would never be the same as it had been, before they came to the future, but their little quadrant of time travelers had finally found some happiness, even though Jak had been conflicted enough to put his relationship with Keira on hold. Jak put a hand on one of Daxter's scrawny, furry shoulders; his expression was stern, but open to the ottsel's pleas to be heard.
“Okay, Dax. What do you want me to do?” the blond asked, “I'm not trying to ignore you. I'm really not. I just don't see any other way to stay with Keira without raising Erol. It wouldn't be right if I said I love her, and then tried to shirk any parental responsibility as her husband. I think Damas would have agreed that just isn't right.”
Daxter sighed and looked away, his ears flat against his skull as he kicked at nothing in particular.
“All right, all right,” Dax said, “I see your point, hot shot. All I'm sayin' is, give it a trial period! Don't pop the question right away. Try livin' with 'em for awhile, and see if you can stand the little brat first. If you honestly like him enough to be his daddy, then go for it. I'll totally be your best man, if you do!”
Jak smiled, absolutely relieved to know that he had his best friend's support, even if his decision sounded crazy to most. He squeezed the ottsel's shoulder once, then straightened up.
“Thanks! That really means a lot to me,” Jak said, “Seriously.”
Daxter snorted, before he placed his hands on his hips and finally glanced up.
“Yeah, well, don't thank me just yet!” Daxter said, “Think about who's gonna be your father-in-law... Havin' to put up with Bottle-fed Loser and ol' Termites for Brains? Yeesh! They better put a big honkin' statue of you in the smack-dab middle of New Haven, where everybody can see it, or give you a medal and a ceremony in front of the whole city, or somethin'! 'Cause honestly, Jak? Either you're in the closet about bein' a masochist, or you're the biggest freakin' martyr I ever met.”
Jak blanched. He liked Samos all right, but Daxter had a point. Living with the old sage and the little rugrat version of Erol was going to be a lot different than seeing them semi-frequently. Even living with Keira was probably going to be different. At the end of the day, if any of them pissed Jak off, he could go home and relax, or just hang out with Daxter. Staying in the same household would change all of that, including how much time he had left over for his friends, considering how young Erol was.
Daxter smirked, seeing the misgivings flicker across his friend's face. Then he began walking away, motioning for the suddenly anxious blond to follow.
“Come on, let's get this over with,” Daxter said, “After all that, I ain't lettin' you get cold feet! We're gonna find out how brave you really are, and then you're either gonna be movin' back into our swingin' bachelor pad, or I'm gonna be bawlin' my eyes out, while I make a toast at yer weddin'!”
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Tectonic Shift