Adult-FanFiction.org : Games

Idiot Sandwich	By : Ditmag Category: -Misc Video Games/RPGs > AU - Alternate Universe Views: 282 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Monster Girl Quest is owned by Toro Toro Resistance. I make no money from this project

Chapter List
- 1-Isekai?
- 1
Ditmag awoke slowly, his dreams vivid and untroubled. He wasn’t used to such sound sleep, having experienced sleeping problems ever since he took a job that involved overnight shift work. He was so unused to sleeping well, that on the rare occasions that he did, he tended to have no idea where he was.
Sure enough, Ditmag finally awoke completely, with no comprehension of why he was in a hotel room that looked several decades out of date. Not that he would have known where he was even if he had slept normally(as in very little). Because Ditmag hadn’t yet figured out that he had never checked into a hotel, but had gone to sleep in his own bed that night.
At first, Ditmag didn’t panic. He wasn’t even concerned. He assumed that it must have been a good night, and soon enough he would remember why he was in a very old looking hotel room.
Ditmag was in his forties, but his memory was that of someone twenty years older due to poor sleep for too many years. He was used to forgetting things. He simply assumed that he must have checked in for a reason. Was he traveling for his company? If so, where and why? Usually his memory wasn’t THAT bad.
Ditmag shuffled over to the bathroom. After taking a long pee into a surprisingly modern-looking toilet, he stared into the bathroom mirror over the sink.
That’s not my face, Ditmag thought blearily. The reflection in the mirror was at least twenty years younger, if not thirty. Barely pubescent. Ditmag blinked. The reflection blinked as well.
Ah, I get it, Ditmag thought. Dream. I don’t remember why I’m here because I’m not really here. I’m just dreaming. Ditmag looked away from the mirror and looked back again. The young man in the mirror continued to stare back.
That’s odd, he thought. Normally mirrors in my dreams are unreliable, showing different things each time I look. Hmmm….
Ditmag tentatively reached out with his fingers to touch the mirror. He’d read that in dreams, mirrors acted as portals. Maybe if he touched the mirror he’d find he could walk through it and end up somewhere else.
His fingers contacted the glass and stopped. It felt like…. Glass. Well, shit, Ditmag thought. Furthermore, the reflections fingers matched his movements and remained quite consistently young. And yet, not Ditmag when he was younger. The face in the mirror was a completely different person.
He looked down and found that his clothes were also not the ones he’d gone to bed with. Actually, he’d gone to bed in only his underwear. He’d awakened in garb that was in between medieval and modern. No zippers, only buttons, but it seemed easy enough to figure out. He unbuttoned his pants and looked down. Huh, he thought. Not bad. A little bigger, he noted, although he couldn’t be certain quite yet.
He made a muscle in the mirror with his bicep. Oooohhhhh…. He thought. Nice. Ditmag had never been good at building muscle, even as a youth. He’d had excellent cardio, but never was much for upper body strength, even when he worked out. Despite the fact that the face staring back at him couldn’t have been older than twenty(and could very well have been as young as thirteen for all he knew), the bicep was actually pretty impressive. He puffed out his chest. It was pretty impressive as well. Ditmag opened his tunic a little. Nice pecs, he thought. Heh. I’m having a dream that I’m young and buff. Cool.
Ditmag heard a commotion outside the door. Someone was losing it in the hallway, running up and down and screaming.
He opened the door just in time to see a young boy running past him, freaking out. Other heads poked out of other doors. The other heads also belonged to rather young men.
As the boy sped back down the hall, Ditmag blocked his path.
“Holy shit! Holy shit! Holy shit!” the boy shouted, jumping up and down in front of him. “I’m not me! I’m not fucking me!”
“Well I’m not me either,” Ditmag replied. “Is anyone else here themselves?”
“Nope,” one of the boys answered. Others shook their heads as well.
“Okay, so I’m in a hallway, not me, with a bunch of other guys who aren’t themselves either,” Ditmag mused. “So what does a dream like that mean?”
“I don’t think it’s a dream, bro!” the panicked boy shouted in his face. “I think…. I think…. We’ve been isekai’d!”
“Ise-what?” Ditmag asked.
“Isekai’d!” the boy yelled. “You know, transported to a fantasy world!”
“Or I’m just dreaming,” Ditmag said.
That caused the boy to kick him in the shin.
“Ow!!!” Ditmag roared. “Mother-“
“Still think it’s a dream?” the other boy said smugly.
Ditmag had to admit that the pain had been pretty intense. Not that he had never felt pain in dreams. It just usually wasn’t as vivid, usually dull pain.
One of the other boys strode cautiously out into the hallway.
“Well if we have been transported to another world,” he observed. “And we’re not dreaming, then we should probably find out a little about each other. Then we can figure out what kind of trouble we’re in.”
“Sounds reasonable,” Ditmag replied. “I’ll start. I’m Ditmag. Well, that’s not my real name, but it’s what you can call me until I can trust you guys enough to give you my real identity. Besides, if this is a fantasy world, we have to be cautious. True names have power in some fantasy worlds. So we should all go by pseudonyms until we know more.”
“Sounds reasonable,” the calmer boy said. “You can call me Iguana then.”
“Iguana?” Ditmag asked. “Wh-?”
“There’s a story behind it, and maybe later I’ll tell you.”
“I’m Drago,” the boy who had been panicking piped up. “Okay, I know these are introductions, but why are we all shotas?”
“Shotas?” Ditmag asked.
“You know, young boys,” Drago replied. “Who are likely to be hunted by older women and used for lewd things.”
“He might be right,” another boy said. “Name’s PP by the way.”
“PP?” Iguana asked. “I’d love to hear the story behind that one.”
“Another time,” PP replied casually. “For now, let’s look at what we’re dealing with. We’re all shotas. We’ve been transported to another world. Why as shotas? What purpose does that serve?”
“Maybe whoever summoned us is a perverted cougar?” Drago theorized.
“We can figure that out soon enough, hopefully,” Ditmag said. “C’mon everyone, introduce yourselves.”
The other boys reluctantly emerged into the hallway. All of them were shorter than Ditmag, and even younger looking than he was. The youngest looking, Drago, didn’t look a day over twelve. Most looked like young teenagers of varying ethnicities. All were good looking. Maybe there was something to this perverted cougar idea.
“I’m Dagoth,” a particularly striking boy said. “And…. Something weird happened to me. I’m not sure…. I’m not sure I’m human.”
“Dude, you do look pretty scaly,” another boy noted.
“Yeah, I have some scales on my body in parts, but the weirdest thing…. “ Dagoth tailed off.
“What’s the weirdest thing?” Iguana asked.
Dagoth lowered his pants to reveal two penises.
“Oh, fuck, I can never unsee that!” Iguana exclaimed, covering his eyes and looking away.
“Sorry,” Dagoth said, pulling his pants back up.
“That is seriously badass,” PP said. “I only got one. It’s big as fuck though. Although I won’t know for sure until it’s aroused. You guys wanna see?”
“NO!” everyone shouted.
“Fine,” PP shrugged. “be jealous of my good fortune.”
“Ugh,” Ditmag groaned. “Who else do we have here? What’s your name?” he asked, pointing to a kid who seemed a little shy.
“I guess… I guess I’ll go by Link,” he said. “Wait a minute, did you say your name was Ditmag?”
“Yeah, I did,” Ditmag replied. “Wait, and you…. You’re… Iguana?”
“Yeah, and….. aw, fuck me,” Iguana moaned.
“We’re…. we’re THERE, aren’t we?” Drago said.
“Let’s not jump to conclusions just yet,” Ditmag cautioned. “How about we leave this hotel, check out the village, or city, or whatever, and find out more.”
“Do you think we have powers?” Link asked eagerly.
“We’d better, or our lives are gonna be pretty short,” PP observed.
“Again, let’s not jump to conclusions,” Ditmag reminded them all. “Let’s go outside, and as Iguana said, see what kind of trouble we’re in.”
The boys walked outside cautiously, into a fairly bustling, but peaceful village. The village appeared mostly medieval, although there were smatterings of modernism, from a neon light sign on a nearby pub, to a man mowing his lawn with an gas powered lawnmower. No cell phones though. No cars. A soldier strode past the group and smiled and waved. No gun. No BDUs. Classic armor and sword.
“Yep, definitely isekai’d, unless this is a very bad Renaiissance festival,” Dagoth observed.
“Yeah, but are we in THAT world?” Drago asked.
“Excuse me, sir?” Iguana asked a passing fellow who seemed friendly. “Sorry, we’re visitors and we’re not really sure where we are. What village is this?”
The man looked at Iguana quizzically. “You been drinking, son?” he asked. “You boys arrived here yesterday, looking quite pleased with yourselves. Said you were here to get baptized.”
One of the boys fainted, although Iguana couldn’t tell which.
“So this is…. This is… Ilias Village?” Iguana asked, completely focused on Citizen A.
“Of course it is!” he replied. “How much did you boys have to drink last night? I don’t recall Luka’s inn serving any hard liquor. Although I guess at your age even his weak wine might be enough to….”
The man turned his head at the sound of more commotion. The boys heard it as well. A man was gesturing frantically at a soldier, and pointing towards the forest just outside the village. Iguana made out the word “monster”.
The man completed the thought. “Monster!” the citizen exclaimed. “You boys get back to your rooms! It’s not safe out here! A monster is about to attack the village! My wife! My son! Oh Goddess, my son! She’ll be after him! He hasn’t been baptized!”
“Any doubts now?” Drago asked Ditmag and Iguana, folding his arms.
“Okay, now we know where we are, and we also have a pretty good idea about what we have in common,” Iguana sighed. “The question now is, what do we do?”
“The prudent thing would obviously be to do what the man said, get back to our rooms and lock our doors,” Ditmag pointed out.
“That’s not what we’re here for though,” Link argued. “We’re here on this day, at this time! We’re supposed to go face the slime girl and save the village!”
“No doubt that’s true, but how?” Iguana asked. “We have no weapons. We can’t even… flail wildly. What are we supposed to do, talk to her?”
“Could work,” Dagoth said. “Lime’s not bad as monsters go.”
“Assuming it’s actually her,” Iguana mused. “Keep in mind that we’re acting as if we’re in a video game. But look around you! This is real! Live action! No drawings, the people running around in a panic are real people! We can’t be sure what we’re going to face if we go out there.”
“He’s right,” Dagoth said. “Could be a sweet, cute, jiggly slime girl, or a D&D type slime that’ll painfully dissolve us and consume us.”
“Well, I’m going, you guys can do what you want,” PP announced. “I’m not missing this opportunity.”
“Bro, you can’t go out there alone!” Drago exclaimed.
“Then come with me,” PP said.
“I’ll go with you,” Link declared.
“Okay, so we’re just gonna waltz into the forest, confront this monster, with no weapons?” Iguana asked.
“There are five of us,” Ditmag pointed out. “Even without weapons, five dudes swinging their fists wildly might be enough to cause her problems.”
“That’s a heck of an assumption,” Iguana said.
“Well, you guys figure it out, I’m going out there to see my girl,” PP said, and began walking towards the village exit.”
“I think it’s that way,” Link pointed out.
“Oh, shit, yeah,” PP said, noticing the path leading out of the village in the opposite direction from where he was headed.
PP and Link quickly made their way to the exit.
“Well guys?” Iguana asked.
“We can’t let them Leroy Jenkins us,” Ditmag pointed out. “I guess we have to follow them.”
“That’s exactly how being Leroy Jenkins works,” Dagoth muttered. “The idiot runs in by himself and we’re all obligated to help him out, then we all just get killed. And then he says, ‘At least I got chicken.’ Except here Leroy can’t just sign off.”
“We’ll have to discuss sticking together and making decisions as a group later,” Ditmag said. “I have to think that we all got summoned here for a reason, so we need to stick together, even if it means following those fools into danger.”
“Then I guess it’s decided,” Iguana shrugged. “Let’s try not to get eaten on our first day.”
Nodding to each other, the three followed the impetuous pair into the forest.

They quickly caught up to PP and Link. Link had grabbed a stick.
“What are you going to do with that?” PP asked. “That thing would barely sting if you hit me with it. What’s it gonna do against a slime?”
“Lime’s timid,” Link said hopefully. “You never know. It’s better than nothing.”
Ditmag seemed to agree, grabbing a much larger tree branch that would do a lot more than sting if it hit PP. Iguana, seeming to have an idea, grabbed several sticks, and continued to search the forest with his eyes as the unarmed party of young boys walked.
“So do you think Ilias brought us here?” Dagoth asked no one in particular.
“She’s the most likely candidate,” Ditmag agreed. “Although there are others who might be able to pull something like that off.”
“Where’s Luka?” Link asked. “We should have asked that guy. He said it was Luka’s inn that we were staying in.”
“Maybe Luka’s out here too, looking for that slime,” Iguana mused. “If you see a purple haired kid charging into danger, just let him. We don’t want to fuck around with the timeline here.”
“Good point,” Dagoth agreed. “I’ll keep an eye out. For some reason my eyesight is super sharp in this body. I can smell more things as well. You smell good, Ditmag.”
“Oh, thanks,” Ditmag replied. “I think.”
“Maybe that’s his power,” PP joked. “He tastes real good.”
“Maybe my power is kicking your….” Ditmag retorted.
“Hey guys!” a peppy voice exclaimed.
The boys could only stare. It was indeed nothing like the video game. Oh, Lime was just as blue, and just as shapely, but seeing her in real life, with all of her jiggling in front of them, was nearly overwhelming. She wasn’t just cute. She was lovely, her hair(which was really just slime, like the rest of her) tied in pigtails, perhaps to appeal to what she thought was a group of young teens.
“Let’s see, who do I make feel good first?” Lime wondered. “Or are you guys gonna try to fight me?”
“Are we gonna fight her?” Drago asked.
“No,” PP said firmly. “As a matter of fact…. I think I know what you want.”
“Well, it doesn’t take a genius to know what I want,” Lime giggled. “And I suppose you’re going to give it to me?”
“Damn straight I am!” PP declared. “Babe, I’m all yours, on one condition.”
“Oh, you think you have the power to impose conditions on me?” Lime asked, a slimy eyebrow raised. “You’re a bold boy. But I like that. Okay, I’m feeling amused. Tell me your condition.”
“You can’t keep me,” PP said. “Take what you want from me, but then let me go.”
“You sure about this… er… PP?” Iguana asked. “We know how to beat her.”
“And if she can’t be trusted, you guys will have to,” PP replied. “But if we can get out of this without a fight…..”
“He makes sense,” Ditmag said. “If you’re sure… I mean, I’ll volunteer if you want.”
“Naw, this time I’m taking one for the team,” PP assured him. “You can take one next time.”
“Oh, you’ll be taking more than one for the team,” Lime giggled. “Come on. There’s a nice clearing a dozen meters from here where we can have a little privacy. Not that I mind if the other guys want to watch.”
“Sounds good,” Ditmag said. Iguana blocked him with an outstretched arm.
“Down, Ditmag!” Iguana ordered. “PP, shout if you need us!”
“I got this,” PP said confidently, although the other boys could see that he was sweating, whether from lust or fear or both, no one could be sure, possibly not even PP.
As Lime led PP away to the nearby clearing. Iguana resumed rummaging around.
“Whatcha doing?” Drago asked.
“If this situation goes tits up, we need a real weapon,” Iguana said. “Find me something that can function as string.”
The other boys began looking around as well. PP started crying out happily as incredibly lewd squishing sounds were coming from the clearing. Lime giggled and said barely audible, but clearly dirty, things.
“Will this work?” Link asked, holding up a thin piece of… well… it was stringy.
Iguana tested it by pulling on it. It was pretty tough. Really tough, actually, almost like bamboo, although there was no bamboo in the forest that Iguana could see.
Iguana began working quickly. It was soon obvious what he was making. A bow. It was a tiny bow, pretty pathetic looking actually. The size of the sticks he had found and the shortness of the string limited what he could create on such short notice. But within a few minutes, Iguana proudly displayed a makeshift bow.
“Won’t we need arrows for that?” Dagoth asked.
Iguana sighed and drooped his head. “Shit. I got so excited that I forgot we need ammo. And we’re not just going to find arrows around….”
Drago was holding an actual arrow in his hands.
“The soldiers probably practice out here,” Drago surmised. “Sometimes arrows get lost I guess.”
“Yes!” Iguana cheered. “Now we’re cooking with gas! Well, sort of.”
PP’s cries of ecstasy were still going strong.
“Hee hee, you’re fun!” Lime chortled, the squishing sounds becoming more rhythmic. “You’re semen is delicious! And you’re… kinda making me hot!”
PP’s cries reached a high pitch. But strangely, so did Lime’s. Their twin screams reached a climax and then there was silence.
The bushes parted. Iguana aimed his bow at the source, ready for anything. Was Lime satisfied, or was she going to be greedy and attack?
It was indeed Lime who emerged. Iguana took careful aim, although he wasn’t sure what one arrow would do to a slime. At least I’ll go down fighting, he thought.
“Whew, that was…. Something else!” Lime laughed. “I can’t remember how long it’s been since a man made me come! It’s too bad I promised not to keep your friend! I totally would have if he hadn’t made me promise! Oh well, a good monster keeps her word. I just hope this won’t be the last time I see him! Hee hee! Bye bye, boys! If any of you want to puru puru with me, just come out into the forest and call for me!”
With that, Lime simply left, quite satisfied and no longer a threat to Ilias Village.
The boys cautiously approached the clearing to check on their companion.
“PP, are you all right?” Link called.
“Uhhhhnnnnn……” was the reply.
“Are you decent?” Dagoth asked.
“Fuck no…. I can’t even lift my arm and you want me to get dressed?” PP wheezed. “We’re all dudes here. Just help me out.”
Ditmag shook his head in resignation and led the way into the clearing, where PP was splayed out at an odd angle, completely naked. His clothes fortunately hadn’t been dissolved. They lay next to him. Ditmag and Drago began to dress him.
“I know my superpower!” PP moaned triumphantly. “I made her nut!”
“That doesn’t mean anything,” Iguana argued. “She was having sex with you. Presumably she knows how to pleasure herself. And you… you’re rather… um…. Well endowed.”
“Dude, I made her nut! That’s gotta mean something!”
“How many times did you nut, PP?” Ditmag asked.
“Uh… I lost count… five? Seven? Not sure.”
“At least he’s not passed out,” Link observed.
“That’s something I guess,” Iguana said. “Are we gonna have to carry him back? I guess I could see if I can make a litter to carry him. We can’t be more than a mile away.”
“As if we’re going back to the village,” Dagoth said. “You know what happens soon, right?”
Iguana realized what Dagoth was talking about. Alice. Oh shit. This is gonna get real real, real fast. Iguana mentally prepared himself for the loud boom that he was sure would come. How long had it taken in the game? Minutes?
They waited until PP was able to at least sit up. That took about fifteen minutes. No boom.
“I think I can get up now,” PP said, trying to get to his feet and failing utterly.
“Well, if we do hear Alice’s arrival, we need to get there quick, and we can’t leave PP behind,” Ditmag said.
“Maybe just one of us should go?” Drago asked. “It should be me.”
“You really want to run into the Monster Lord, alone?” Iguana asked.
“She likes shotas, and I’m the shota-ist of all of you,” Drago countered.
“I’m pretty sure we’re all pretty shotafied, although Ditmag’s a little bigger than the rest of us,” Link said.
“Naw, we’ll all go see her,” PP said. “I’m gonna try again.”
PP did try again, rising to his feet, his legs shaking. “See,” PP said, laughing. “It’s nothing.”
Drago and Ditmag caught him before he fell back down again. Then they abruptly dropped him and stared. PP, at first angry about being so rudely dropped, had something to say, but his words were cut off as he stared in the direction Drago and Ditmag were. Iguana quickly pointed the bow at the new threat.
It was a moth girl.
“It’s a fucking moth girl!” Dagoth cried.
“Oh shit,” PP said. “And it’s a fucking FUTA moth girl!”
- 1
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Idiot Sandwich