Adult-FanFiction.org : Games

Can't Let You Go	By : Ellynndaria Category: +A through F > Dragon Age (all) > Dragon Age (all) Views: 7632 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: We do not own Dragon Age, nor the characters from it. We do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 16
- 17
- 18
          The evening was cool, a breeze working through the trees like nature’s wind chimes. The porch furniture was surprisingly comfortable, and at the moment, the love seat was being unitized for snuggling. It had been a long time since Anders had the opportunity to enjoy a night like this and was reminded of nights on the porch with Irving. He smiled at the thought. One major difference though, it was usually a cat snuggled in his lap, while at the moment he was using Douglas’ thigh as a pillow. A similarity was Douglas idly petting him, and Anders couldn’t help but purr.
          They had been here a week, spending most evenings like this. When Douglas had first shown him the way the sun set behind them could be viewed on the surface of the water, Anders had been entranced. He still was to be honest. The moment had passed for this evening; meaning tonight was their second to last before heading back to the city.
          Anders had still casually brought up staying up here. An owner didn’t have to actually be at a place of business to make money, but Douglas would just point out the old saying of doing it oneself if one wanted it done right. It was just a nice idea anyway, the thought of no responsibilities and no psycho brothers, but Anders knew he would eventually get bored and miss his patients. This was the most relaxed he felt in years though, and his mood swings had tapered off dramatically.
          Working had always kept him distracted before, but he realized he needed just as much time to actually sort through the things that only got shoved to the side. Douglas helped him, either with talking or just giving space. Nate tried, but a lot of times things got turned into arguments, only made worse by the fact the other man wouldn’t back off. All of Douglas’ persuasion must come with knowledge of when to walk away and try again later.
          Douglas was reading while Anders was just enjoying the closeness and the relative silence. Suddenly the book lowered, and Douglas muttered, “Remind me to make an appointment with my dentist when we get back.”
          Anders looked up slightly concerned, “Are your teeth bothering you?”
          Douglas chuckled and shook his head, “No. I just remembered I had planned to do it this week for my Halloween costume, but something came up.” He smiled at Anders, brushing away blond hair behind an ear.
          “Oh.” Anders smiled even though in his mind churned slight anxiety about the upcoming party. It seemed a big deal to Douglas, and although given the opportunity not to go, he couldn’t bypass something so clearly important to his lover. They would just be careful. To be honest, Anders was treating this almost like a test, if they could really do this or not; if he could.
          “Hey,” Douglas looked at him in seriousness, “Everything will be fine. No matter what happens, we will get through it together. Alright?” Expression changed, softening with a smile and blue eyes sparkling, “You aren’t going to get rid of me, Anders. You’re stuck, and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
          Anders was a little stunned by the confession at first, but he gave a small nod, searching the face above him. He smiled before settling back in to the snuggle and silence. Looking over the water for a few minutes, he sighed, “How do you leave this place?”
          Douglas still hadn’t returned to his book, viewing the scene with his lover instead. “I almost didn’t once.”
          Anders suddenly had the flash of Douglas being a reclusive hermit flashing through his mind, and it didn’t seem at all as nice as the idea of them staying up here together. It was actually extremely sad to think about, knowing the social nature of his lover apparently was something that has stuck with him his entire life.
          After a few moments, Douglas shut his book, placing it on a small table beside him. Using both hands now to give light caresses to the blonde man in his lap, Douglas continued, “After my mother died, I came here to deal with it all. I almost couldn’t. At the time it was just me and her at the estate. I guess you could say I felt like it was my job to take care of her after all the hard times she went through to do the same for us. It should have been easy. We obviously were much better off than before, and of course, she was an adult, not three children. One night, I was busy and couldn’t answer my phone, and by the time I was able, my phone was going off like crazy. People calling to tell me something happened at the old house.”
          Douglas took a deep breath, letting it out slowly before going on, “I finally got a hold of Fellon, and he barely could tell me anything. I got to the house, and he was outside, quite shaken obviously, which for my brother to be such is nerve rattling in its own right. No one would let me in, especially Fellon, he was adamant. So, the last time I ever saw my mother was earlier that morning, talking about flowers and hats, and the possibilities for my love life.”
          A hand paused in the blonde hair, giving the thin shoulder a squeeze, “The funeral was a few days later, closed casket. I did eventually find out the whys to such reasoning, no thanks to my brother. I will spare you, though, as he attempted for me and Bethany. For about a week, I tried to stay at the estate, but I was always expecting Mother waiting for me in the kitchen after my swim. At one point, I had the thought Well, I didn’t actually see her, so what if they are wrong? As if my own brother wouldn’t know for sure. As if him to witness it wasn’t good enough for my brain to conceive the possibility I would never see her again.”
          Anders swallowed.   He knew that feeling. His mind tried to tell him the same thing until he had actually gotten back to Tennessee to see Irving and accept he was all alone again. He hugged Douglas’ knees.
          “We found out later the bastard was looking for Fellon, and Mother just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Anyway, I couldn’t fathom going back to the estate by myself. Fellon dragged me back though and moved in.” Douglas shrugged, “The rest is pretty much the same as it had been until I met you.”
          Anders nodded, taking it all in. He finally decided to open up himself, it was why they were here, wasn’t it? Douglas had tried a couple times, but Anders thought it would ruin the point of the getaway. Now seemed a good time. “I had always had a problem with drinking. I started slightly before I met Irving. It might even be true I would have never met Irving if not for alcohol. I was looking for it, somewhere I wasn’t supposed to be, when I got attacked by the dog. Not just, but if I had stopped at the food, I might have been okay and out of there, but I had to go snooping. After that incident, I was happier. Too much partying on the weekends possibly, but not out of hand completely, my grades were still good, and I held down my responsibilities.”   Anders shrugged before letting out a sigh, “When Irving died, I really went downhill. My boyfriend at the time, Karl, got me help. I thought when he moved away, I would lose it again, but he kept contact with me, keeping me out of trouble. Then I met Nate. Nate and I butt heads quite a bit, always have, but he’s got broad shoulders for leaning on and is actually someone who can out stubborn me. When Karl died, I lost it, but Nate helped me get my feet back under me.   We fell in love for the wrong reasons. We figured it out later, but when it ended with him, we both saw it coming, and for me it wasn’t exactly the crushing blow the others had been. As you can probably tell, he is still around to kick me in the ass when I need it.” Anders looked up at Douglas, “Now I have you, too.”
          “You’ll always have me, love.”
          Anders rolled over on his back. “Always is a lot to promise.”
          “Would you rather I not?”
          Anders pondered this question for a several seconds. “Irving promised it. When I lost him, it felt like he had broke his word. I learned differently though. He’s still here, just in a different way. Not haunting me or anything like that, but I am still learning from the things he taught me. Still know he loved me right to the end. Karl and Nate, too.” Anders looked at Douglas a moment, “Others did, but they let me down, but I guess I didn’t need them anyway.” Anders looked down at his hands a moment, “I always want the promise to tell the truth.” He looked back up, “I want it even more now from you.”
          Douglas nodded with a small lopsided grin. “I will always be here for you, Anders.”
- 16
- 17
- 18
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Can't Let You Go