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Can't Let You Go	By : Ellynndaria Category: +A through F > Dragon Age (all) > Dragon Age (all) Views: 7633 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: We do not own Dragon Age, nor the characters from it. We do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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           Once inside his room, Anders closed his eyes, trying to banish any other thoughts from his mind. Douglas had occasionally stopped by during the work week, never staying the night or very long at all for that matter, always claiming he couldn’t sleep restfully anywhere besides his own bed, but Anders always felt Douglas was secretly embarrassed of falling for someone without money. It wasn’t the first time one of Anders’ lovers had felt that way. Anders could have money, he just chose not to, and if Douglas didn’t like that, well, fine with him. He turned to the other man who obviously felt Anders wasn’t good enough for them either and raised an eyebrow, “Well?”
            Fellon looked up, a hint of surprise flickering in his blue eyes. It was gone instantly, and Fellon gave a graceful little shrug with one muscled shoulder. “Whatever you like. I mean what I say. You can do… whatever you want with me.”
            Anders smirked and walked slowly toward the other man, close enough to feel his body heat seeping through the thin t-shirt. His lips hovered close to the others, his gaze completely focused on them and avoiding eye contact. “Whatever I want, huh?” A finger trailed over the hard muscled chest and abs before moving around, and Anders took tight hold on the firm backside. Fellon slowly nodded an affirmative, grunting softly at Anders’ unexpectedly strong grip but he stood passively, allowing Anders to do as he liked, as promised.
            The hand released its hold, moving lightly across the hip before trailing up across the front of the other man’s pants, finally splaying across the abs. His lips still were within a hair’s breadth of touching the others when he asked, “Well, all these clothes definitely won’t do then, now will they?” Anders took a large step back, reaffixing the raised eyebrow and smirk to his expression. He fully expected the other man to finally bolt for the front door, but Fellon shook his head with the same slow movements in answer, and his agile fingers slid his belt buckle loose, flicking open the button on his jeans.
Waist band loosened, Fellon pulled the hem of his t-shirt free of his jeans and slowly stripped the layer of cotton up over his head. His torso, however, was far from naked; on his left pectoral, over his heart, were three tattoos in black ink of characters in either Japanese or Chinese. From his shoulders to halfway down his biceps was a solid covering of tattoo art. Celtic knotwork decorated the skin along his collarbone, and it appeared the artwork continued onto his back.
            This was definitely a change of pace. Other than the large scar on Douglas’ chest, his skin was perfectly unmarred while Nate had a single tattoo himself across his heart. Anders’ eyes studied the artwork facing him on the living canvas, tilting his head and his gaze following the knot. His lips faintly ticked their approval at the freshly revealed muscles and tan skin. Fellon allowed Anders time to examine his extensive artwork, kicking out of his boots and socks while the eyes were distracted before his hands moved to his jeans, slowly dragging the zipper downward. With fluid, obviously well-practiced movements, Fellon easily slid the denim down his well-muscled legs, stepping out of them gracefully and showing that for one, he did not wear undergarments, and two, he was tanned everywhere. Anders allowed a smile to play across his lips a moment before his teeth scraped across his bottom lip. He walked slowly back toward the now naked man, running a hand along the hard muscles of his body with an appreciative hum. “That’s a lot better.”
            Fellon closed his eyes, shivering noticeably at Anders’ touch. He didn’t speak and kept his gaze carefully averted. Anders didn’t notice which way the blue eyes were looking; he was trying his damnedest not to look at them himself. They were too much like Douglas’, maybe a shade darker. He did notice the shudder, and he frowned, saying in obvious irritation, “I know… You think I’m not good enough for you…”He turned, walking over to his nightstand drawer and plucking the bottle of lubricant out before returning and making a show of tossing it on the end of the bed making sure the other man knew it was there.
            Fellon almost snapped a retort at Anders, eyes snapping upward and mouth opening, but his attention was instantly caught by the bottle bouncing onto the bed. His mouth closed and his eyes lowered once more, again standing passively.
            Anders stood close again, running his hands lightly up the muscled arms. “You’re arrogant enough to think he’s the only one in this room that is any good with his hands and mouth, aren’t you?” He used one finger, lightly running a circle over the right nipple with a finger. “You could find out…” His finger ran little light flourishes all across Fellon’s chest heading south. “Or since my sex life seems to be a topic of conversation in that house, you could just ask Douglas.” His hand came very close to brushing against Fellon’s length before working back up and running a circle around the left with the nipple ring. “Or Isabela.”
            Fellon gave a small smirk at Anders’ words. “I prefer the term ‘confidant.’” His chest and abs visibly tensed and quivered slightly under Anders’ light caresses, and the man’s last comment actually prompted a chuckle. “As for Bela, she’s been far too popular over the years to remember every cock she’s ridden, but I am intrigued.”
            Anders remained nonchalant by the obvious, but absolutely expected, insult, “Well, in that case, I suppose you’ll just have to find out for yourself.”
            “I suppose I will.” Taking a breath, Fellon stepped away from the door and stalked closer to the bed with careful, languid movements, eyes flicking ever so briefly, almost imperceptibly, toward the bottle of lubricant before glancing toward a still fully clothed Anders, wondering what his next move would be.
            Fellon wasn’t the only one intrigued; Anders had given this man several chances to leave and yet he was still here, standing stark naked next to his bed. Anders had to wonder why he was being so turned on by all this. Besides being obviously gorgeous, the masculinity was practically oozing from the other man, and he tried to banish the notation he was receiving a sick type of thrill of getting his ex lover back by sleeping with his brother. “I’m inclined to agree, the time for small talk is over.” He walked over to stand next to the bed too.
Fellon nodded once, offering Anders a smirk of invitation and waiting for instruction from the man in charge. Though he kept his breathing carefully controlled, his breath rate increased marginally.
“Well, I usually do this on the bed, so unless you have something else in mind…” Anders pointed to it, “There it is.”
            Fellon swallowed, and crawled up onto the bed, lips curled in a half-smile as he knelt in the middle of the mattress. “How do you want me?” he asked in a low and husky tone.
            “Usually, my answer to a question like that would be naked and begging for mercy, but you are already naked and proven quite skillful at begging… Shall we just work on the mercy part then? Where does that put you in that scenario?”
            Fellon’s eye twitched ever so slightly. For a moment, his surroundings faded away, and he wasn’t on a soft bed in a warm, inviting bedroom. He shook the images away, and his little half-smile was back on his face before his lapse could be noticed. He slowly lowered himself onto his hands and knees in the middle of the bed, folding his arms and resting his head against them, leaving his ass presented like an offering. The angle obscured the details of the intricate tattoo work that did, indeed, cover his back.
            Raising an eyebrow, Anders was a bit surprised at the positioning. This did not seem to be a man who would be on the bottom or at least not in his experience. He shook his head in confusion before disposing of his own clothes now that the back was turned and climbing on the bed also grabbing the bottle as he passed it. The top of the bottle announced its opening in the small room as Anders moved up behind Fellon, and he noticed the body faintly tense up in front of him at the popping sound which only added to his confusion. A man used to this would usually have a reaction of anticipation rather than apprehension.
            Anders instinctively reached out a soothing hand, about to tell Fellon he did not have to do this if he really didn’t want to. To assure the other man he was just as comfortable on the bottom, and in all honesty, that was how Anders had pictured all this going, why he was honestly so turned on in the first place, but when his hand touched the upturned backside, the other man jumped. Anders yanked back his hand, the words never coming out.
            Anders was growing more confused by the second. His eyes finally moving away from the offered well sculpted ass to the tattoos on the man’s back. Amber eyes automatically moved to the focal point, two hawks with brilliant blue eyes positioned around each other in a yin and yang design, and he reached out to run his hand to lightly touch the one that most likely represented Douglas. The shudder was expected this time, but the hand did not remove itself from Fellon’s back, registering what the tattoos were trying to cover up. Scars.
The light of the setting sun shone through the bedroom window, and now that Anders knew what to look for, he discovered the scars were all over Fellon’s back just like the tattoos and the hand moved lower to unobstructed the view of the two hawks the fingers running across several more scars. There was another smaller, almost pretty hawk, and Anders guessed it to represent their sister while the other designs seemed to be filler, or something that had some meaning to Fellon. He was about to remove his hand when his fingers brushed scars that seemed different than lash marks, more clustered together, shorter, thinner and pointing different directions. Anders leaned forward slightly due to their positioning to take a look, old script, carved into the lower back saying ‘BITCH’, and as he pulled away what looked to be fingernail scars on the his hips.
            Anders sat back on his heels in shock, looking at the man before him who clearly did not want to do this with what appeared to be with understandable reason, and yet there he was doing it anyway. Why? Anders started to go over the events of the evening, and the realization hit him like a ton of bricks and instantly felt disgusted with himself. “Fuck!” he shouted and flew off the bed, closing the bottle still in his hand and dropping it to floor like it had burned him. Grabbing up his pants and shoving himself into them with another “FUCK!” he faced the wall, not looking at Fellon, “You didn’t want this at all, did you? You thought you had to do this.” Anders thought he was going to be sick without even waiting for the answer, closing his eyes. “Why…? Why would you do this? I don’t understand.”
            Fellon listened to Anders rant for a moment before righting himself and moving to sit on the edge of the bed, leaning forward a bit and resting his forearms on his knees. He made no move to get dressed. “I told you I’d do this if you went to see Douglas. You said you’d go see him. I don’t go back on my word.” He made it sound like the simplest, most logical thing in the world.
            Anders started breathing frantically, “What?” almost turning to look at the other man before snapping his eyes back to the corner. “Are you… are you crazy? You were going to force yourself to sleep with me just so I would go see Douglas? I told you I would see him without this!” Anders braced an arm against the wall and leaned his head against it. “Just… wonderful… fucking wonderful…”
            “Apparently, what you think you were saying and what I was hearing were two different things.” Unperturbed, Fellon rose from the bed, calmly collecting his jeans and pulling them on. He was not particularly self-conscious, but Anders was definitely disturbed by his nudity, among other things, at the moment.
            Anders still couldn’t look at him although he could tell by the sounds being made the other man had at least put his pants back on. “Apparently…”
            “I’m not entirely sure what the conflict is, though. It was a business transaction. Personal feelings didn’t really filter into it…well, not beyond motive.”
            “The conflict is I’m still in love with your brother, and apparently you love him too beyond common misconceptions… Enough to do this to make sure I went to go talk to him! Ugh.” Anders sighed, “I still don’t get it.”
            “You’re still in love with him? Then why have you been such an asshole? I know you’re torn up over the whole Halloween clusterfuck… You’ve lost enough weight that even I can tell… Why let it come to this? You should have talked to him weeks ago, before -” Fellon cut himself off, grabbing his t-shirt off the floor and angrily yanking it on. He hissed slightly when the collar snagged the bandage on his cheek, ripping it off of the fresh wound. “Dammit…!”
            “Once again, how did this become all my fault? Of course, I’m torn up about it, you ass! I lost the man I love!” Anders finally looked at him, “And what the fuck happened to your face?!” Anders let out a loud, exasperated groan. “Follow me,” he demanded. Exiting the bedroom, he walked toward the kitchen where the blood wouldn’t drip on the carpet and the first aid kit was.
            “I got it in a gun fight.” Fellon called after Anders’ retreating back. Fellon almost chuckled at the other man’s attitude. Almost. Holding the torn bandage over his cheek to keep it from dripping, Fellon collected his socks and boots with his free hand and silently padded along after the doctor.
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Can't Let You Go